heavenonearth: ([end] .50)
ᴄᴀsᴛɪᴇʟ ([personal profile] heavenonearth) wrote in [community profile] driftfleet2016-03-21 01:52 am

i have become comfortably numb

Who: Castiel & You Poor Unfortunate Souls
Broadcast: Fleetwide
Action: Waystation
When: Todayish..?? From like the 19th through the 21st. Text post is on the 22nd. Also a warning that this post contains drug use/references, cursing, and potential Unhappy Talk about painful subjects/depression what have you.


[ it's easy, you know, to drown all of your shit out when you've got a bright, loud, roaring space station of extravagance, entertainment and debauchery to keep you occupied every moment of the day that isn't spent sleeping. good food, good drugs, good company - after living so long in a near-literal hellhole it'd been such an easy thing to give into temptation and drown his troubles in the usual ways, to have a good time, laugh and eat and distract himself with pretty lights and pretty people.

but space is quiet, once you're out in it, and soon enough they've drawn far away from the starlight and cas finds himself cut off from his sport. sure, he can still drink and get high, but that's not really the same, and without all the noise and bustle and activity of the station to drown out all of his thoughts it becomes.. more difficult to face certain realities that he's yet to come to terms with. dean's gone, probably dead back home, and cas hasn't stopped thinking about those crotes, about the hard bite of their teeth into his throat and their foul, suffocating breath. there's no going back home. not for him. and even if he could, there's nothing to go back to. it's all dead and gone, all his fault, and facing up to the hulking mountain of mistakes that his life has been, well -

- he's not strong enough. back home the weight of it was straining him, bending him, but then at least he had purpose, at least he had that thin sliver of hope. here? well, here it's a wash. here there's no more hope, and he's not bending, he's breaking.

so when that snap comes, he's gone from the red fish, disappearing to the waystation where he can blow all his newly acquired funds on booze and whatever cheap stuff is in these vending machines that will fuck him up properly. losing track of time is easy, days pass and he doesn't return to the ship, forgets to eat half the time, sleeps under benches, wanders aimlessly, but spends most of his time passed out beside one of the more remote vending machines, the lit cigarette loose in his hands burning down to his knuckles. ]

[ ooc; he's got some fellow shipmates coming to the rescue, so feel free to come across him any time, when he's relatively sober or less so, whatever's comfortable! he'll be there a couple days just moping about, so any time in that period is fine! ]


So tell me, what do you guys do for a bad hangover, eh? Gotta be some homespun remedies we've got access to, right? These protein solids really aren't doing the trick.
child_of_bhaal: (oh)

[personal profile] child_of_bhaal 2016-03-30 08:54 am (UTC)(link)
[Well. That'll stop her in her tracks, for a good heart beat. Hand holding is nice, hugs are great. She's even shared the same bed with people before, purely for sleeping purposes, but kissing, even in just a friendly fashion, is enough to get her to stop breathing for a moment.

In her way, she's probably as hungry for affection as he is. She's been touched in kindness more in the past year on the fleet than she has her entire remembered life. People offer their hands to her in greeting. She's been embraced and embraced others, when comfort was desperately needed. But kissing has not been among the things she's done. It's not a thing that had been ever done to her. Well, almost the once, back home, when Anomen had utterly misread their friendship as something more, but she had run away from that moment like a skittish colt with its tail on fire.

And now, she sits, and tries to remind herself she ought to blink. Or let the air out of her lungs that she's holding. She manages it after a few seconds, and she can feel her face warming. She must look pink from head to toe....if one could tell such a thing under all her clothes.

...it's what friends are for... Right?
child_of_bhaal: (Syeira)

[personal profile] child_of_bhaal 2016-03-30 09:17 am (UTC)(link)
[His easy way is helpful, lets her relax and let the tension go. It was a grateful gesture, and he only meant well by it, so she'll stop acting like a silly child. Yes? Surely, she will. Though it's hard to will away the blushing. Of course, she does that so often these days, certainly it must seem practically habitual for her.]

Well that's certainly not true. You seem quite adept to me.
child_of_bhaal: (hope)

[personal profile] child_of_bhaal 2016-04-01 05:13 am (UTC)(link)
When have you ever known me to get any rest?

[She squeezes his hand right back.]

You're the one who needs it anyway. And maybe someone to watch over you in case you get sick. So I think I'll stick around for a little while.

[It's not a request. Nor does she ask if it's alright with him. For some occasions, politeness only gets in the way.]
child_of_bhaal: icon made by Stick (But why?)

[personal profile] child_of_bhaal 2016-04-02 01:04 am (UTC)(link)
[She looks so confused by that.]

You're going to catch...??

No never mind. You sleep.

[She slides, literally, off the edge of his bed, and sits on the floor, leaning against it.]