[The thing is, Caesar doesn't want to be responsible. He's spent years being responsible, until the only way not to be responsible was to hurt people - people he just met, or himself, by throwing himself headlong down a path of revenge that he couldn't possibly walk alone. He was responsible by isolating himself, by working himself too hard every day, by holding himself to some standard that nobody else cared about.]
[He's not going to be responsible now. He actually doesn't care if the men outside find them. There are plenty of weapons to hand; he could dispatch them in five seconds and get back to kissing Joseph in six. That's not what he cares about.]
[What he cares about is that Joseph is holding him still, his breathing coming fast and rough, holding him still so he can kiss him again and again, and as much as he likes to tell himself that he hates being manhandled he doesn't mind this at all, doesn't mind being pushed back and claimed and kissed like their lives depend on it.]
[This wasn't how he was planning it. He wasn't planning it at all - was going to keep quiet and just let things be as they were and be content with that. But he isn't sorry, and he isn't going to be responsible, and he absolutely isn't going to stop this for something as stupid as talking. He wraps his arms around Joseph's neck instead and pulls him back against the door, kissing him hard and hungry, his fingers tangling in his hair again, running up and down the back of his neck.]
[If he was going to say one thing right now, it would be I love you. But even that - he can say it like this. So he keeps quiet and kisses Joseph breathless, and he doesn't regret a thing.]
no subject
[He's not going to be responsible now. He actually doesn't care if the men outside find them. There are plenty of weapons to hand; he could dispatch them in five seconds and get back to kissing Joseph in six. That's not what he cares about.]
[What he cares about is that Joseph is holding him still, his breathing coming fast and rough, holding him still so he can kiss him again and again, and as much as he likes to tell himself that he hates being manhandled he doesn't mind this at all, doesn't mind being pushed back and claimed and kissed like their lives depend on it.]
[This wasn't how he was planning it. He wasn't planning it at all - was going to keep quiet and just let things be as they were and be content with that. But he isn't sorry, and he isn't going to be responsible, and he absolutely isn't going to stop this for something as stupid as talking. He wraps his arms around Joseph's neck instead and pulls him back against the door, kissing him hard and hungry, his fingers tangling in his hair again, running up and down the back of his neck.]
[If he was going to say one thing right now, it would be I love you. But even that - he can say it like this. So he keeps quiet and kisses Joseph breathless, and he doesn't regret a thing.]