[It's a lot of feeling to process. She's used to keeping her own emotions at a distance, in a box. Irrelevant to most of the process of her life, only brought out to be used, occasionally to inform a decision. She isn't used to this, this weight. But she knows what loneliness is, and in pursuit of an answer, she can bear it. She knows what it means to be a monster, to truly be a monster. To let that word become a wall. It's almost more tolerable, once the weight reaches this point.]
[Her fingers twitch involuntarily on the books in her lap, and she faintly feels them constrict, creak, almost like they're covered. Gloves? She's beginning to have some idea whose mind she's in now, and feels as though she might be interrupting. Invading. Forcing her hands to move, she lifts the books, replacing them on the top of the stack, taking a deep breath in and releasing it slowly, waiting for the feeling to lift.]
no subject
[Her fingers twitch involuntarily on the books in her lap, and she faintly feels them constrict, creak, almost like they're covered. Gloves? She's beginning to have some idea whose mind she's in now, and feels as though she might be interrupting. Invading. Forcing her hands to move, she lifts the books, replacing them on the top of the stack, taking a deep breath in and releasing it slowly, waiting for the feeling to lift.]