[ zuko is silent as he absorbs that, and he draws in a breath before letting it out slowly -- a coping mechanism, to ease the pressure in his chest and in an effort to find peace within himself. but it doesn't seem to work, because they're harrowing in on something difficult.
azula doesn't love zuko. she doesn't care about zuko. when zuko defected, she wanted to kill him, and didn't seem to give half a damn if her brother fell off the face of the earth. she didn't miss him when he was exiled, she didn't jump to defend him when ozai attacked him, and she certainly didn't have a second thought in attempting to kill him during their agni kai. she wasn't sorry, and she never will be sorry, and if azula had been made an only child by ozai outright killing zuko for speaking out of turn, zuko is sure she would've preferred that over having an older brother as a risk to her throne.
and, honestly, if zuko were honest with himself, he can't really say he loves azula either. he doesn't hate her, but he also doesn't love her. he doesn't really want her to die, but he would kill her if it meant protecting the people he cares about. azula is everything he doesn't want to be, but she's just as much a product of their family as he is. zuko just chose to take a different path; azula chose to take their father's.
but when it came down to it, zuko spared her. he could've killed her, but he didn't. nobody had questioned him on it, and nobody had demanded her death. they let zuko make the decision, and he decided to spare her. because killing her was something ozai would have done, and zuko had stoutly refused to become his father.
but now that azula is here, like she used to be, and she has the opportunity to avoid all of that in the future, zuko is stuck between wanting to save her, and wanting her to go home and become what she should be, so he doesn't have to deal with it. he's stuck wanting to ensure his sister isn't murdered, and also planning on what the quickest way to kill her is should she elect to slip back into what he last saw her as. there's no middle ground with azula; there is only the inevitable, and that is that zuko and azula are never going to be anything more than at opposite ends of the spectrum. ]
1/2
azula doesn't love zuko. she doesn't care about zuko. when zuko defected, she wanted to kill him, and didn't seem to give half a damn if her brother fell off the face of the earth. she didn't miss him when he was exiled, she didn't jump to defend him when ozai attacked him, and she certainly didn't have a second thought in attempting to kill him during their agni kai. she wasn't sorry, and she never will be sorry, and if azula had been made an only child by ozai outright killing zuko for speaking out of turn, zuko is sure she would've preferred that over having an older brother as a risk to her throne.
and, honestly, if zuko were honest with himself, he can't really say he loves azula either. he doesn't hate her, but he also doesn't love her. he doesn't really want her to die, but he would kill her if it meant protecting the people he cares about. azula is everything he doesn't want to be, but she's just as much a product of their family as he is. zuko just chose to take a different path; azula chose to take their father's.
but when it came down to it, zuko spared her. he could've killed her, but he didn't. nobody had questioned him on it, and nobody had demanded her death. they let zuko make the decision, and he decided to spare her. because killing her was something ozai would have done, and zuko had stoutly refused to become his father.
but now that azula is here, like she used to be, and she has the opportunity to avoid all of that in the future, zuko is stuck between wanting to save her, and wanting her to go home and become what she should be, so he doesn't have to deal with it. he's stuck wanting to ensure his sister isn't murdered, and also planning on what the quickest way to kill her is should she elect to slip back into what he last saw her as. there's no middle ground with azula; there is only the inevitable, and that is that zuko and azula are never going to be anything more than at opposite ends of the spectrum. ]