[Her breath catches as he puts his arms around her. From the look on his face and the way he stood it should have been obvious, but it still came as a surprise to her. It takes another beat before she responds to it, wrapping her arms around him and hugging more tightly than she expected of herself especially with sore arms and she buries her face against him.
In the moment she gets the job done. She always has. She does it smoothly, efficiently and as compassionately as one can do that job while doing the other two things too. She'd even do it with witty banter sometimes. And she can't pretend she doesn't sometimes enjoy the art of a fight when her adrenaline is pumping. But the kill? She never enjoys the kill. And later when the battlefield's gone cold and she's as relatively safe as one can get that's when it comes back to her. When she feels the weight of it no matter how bad the bad guys were or how much it served the common good. It still adds to the burden of it all. More losses.
For all her talk of these people being dead she doesn't really know that for sure. Maybe they'll be able to figure it out more accurately or maybe they never will. But it was still a heavy night for her and while she wouldn't take hearing he thought she was wrong well, he doesn't say it. He gives her what she needed.]
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In the moment she gets the job done. She always has. She does it smoothly, efficiently and as compassionately as one can do that job while doing the other two things too. She'd even do it with witty banter sometimes. And she can't pretend she doesn't sometimes enjoy the art of a fight when her adrenaline is pumping. But the kill? She never enjoys the kill. And later when the battlefield's gone cold and she's as relatively safe as one can get that's when it comes back to her. When she feels the weight of it no matter how bad the bad guys were or how much it served the common good. It still adds to the burden of it all. More losses.
For all her talk of these people being dead she doesn't really know that for sure. Maybe they'll be able to figure it out more accurately or maybe they never will. But it was still a heavy night for her and while she wouldn't take hearing he thought she was wrong well, he doesn't say it. He gives her what she needed.]
Me too.