driftfleet | [Video/Action]

Entry tags:

[Video/Action]

Who: Kitty Pryde and You!
Broadcast: Video
Action: Twin Roses or the Malum on the Iskaulit
When: Now

I have some things I'm looking to send to good homes. There's a lot of men's clothing, some sewing materials, shaving supplies, and a few odds and ends. It's probably time they go to someone who can make use of them. [For anyone whose known her long enough this description might make it clear enough these are Winn's things.] It's been over two years. [She knows exactly how many days over—twenty.] That's probably long enough to hold on to them. [And maybe it will make room for new things.] I'll probably donate them at the next planet if no one is interested, but feel free to stop by the Twin Roses if you want to take a look.

Or stop by the Malum during my shift tonight and we'll pour one out to the people we're still missing. I mean, I'll charge you for the pour, so feel free to use your mouth for it. [She gives the screen a little smile.]

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[She nods to his first point feeling the same way about it and the logic behind it. For the next, however, she laughs to herself.] Yeah? I'm glad one of us knows what I'd pick. [It probably should be an easy choice. Maybe she should be worried that it's not.]

Have you and Wanda talked about it?

[His lips twitch up in a smile.] Ah, let me rephrase that. Do they send us home or the last place we were? Because I don't imagine you've a burning desire to return to Marina. Though I admit I could be wrong there.

[He shakes his head, the troubled look returning.] No. I should speak with the others from my world first and determine the situation there. I know they're further ahead than I am. [He hesitates.] I gather it's nothing good, but I may be needed.

I wasn't thinking about Marina. It's not a great place. Better than home in a lot of ways, and I do miss it. But it would feel like going backward. [And she doesn't know if Reid is still there and as much as she has moved on from him, she doesn't really want to live in a small bubble under the sea with him again.]

Just wondering about all the what ifs involved with going back. Do we go back as we are or as we were? [Memories or no? If she has memories then does she have a chance to change things? Can she save the world? Her X-Men family?]

It does seem like the more people remember from your world the less good it is. [She's noticed changes in Thor over time, but she doesn't know who is furthest along in their timelines.]

Better than your home is, I am afraid, a fairly low bar.

[And that's exactly his debate, so he nods.] If we have our memories, we can change the way things happen. I'm already aware we all come from different timelines, even those who seem to come from the same world. If I can change things for the better, I owe it to the people I love to try. Yet when I was gone from the Fleet, time passed at home with no memory of this place. If I cannot change things, then I would need to know more about what happens and my role in it.

[He exhales, annoyed.] And so once again we come down to information.

I can't believe you'd talk about my home that way. [Not even really making an attempt to sound serious in her joking.]

I'd have...seconds to save my life if I went back. Maybe less. [Less than seconds is not super heartening.] I'd need to remember and act quickly, but if I could then maybe the future Kurt told me about never happens. [Or maybe she lives and it happens anyway even if she tries to stop it.]

And we probably won't know for sure either way if we decide. I mean it's all far fetched and like I said, I don't trust our would be saviors much more than our captors. [Since they could all be the same people.]

I'd be concerned that the shock of all those new memories would prevent you from taking action. It--

[He grimaces, almost disbelieving that he's saying this.]

It would be an easier choice to make if one had come here after the moment of death. [And isn't that a terrible thought? He rubs the side of his head and is quiet for a moment.]

I've seen Thor's face when he looks at me, Kitty. He is not terribly skilled at concealing his emotions. How do I tell Wanda that?

[Her eyes widen when his subject shifts.]

Are you saying you think you're...? [She leans forward, placing a hand over Vision's.] Have you asked him? Do you know for sure?

Edited (That first icon was OVERKILL! Bad keywords! Not expressive enough!) 2019-06-07 02:40 (UTC)

[He exhales and squeezes her hand.]

I don't know for certain, no. But if I asked Natasha, she would tell me truthfully. Do I want to know?

Yes? I mean...I would. [She always wants to know. Good, bad, or ugly and to be honest it's only ever some combination of the last two.] I don't know what you want. I guess if you did you'd know already.

[He smiles a bit.]

No, you're right. It's better to know. It's one thing if the question is academic, but if it would inform my choices it would be irresponsible to ignore the information.

Though it wouldn't make a decision easier, I think. If going back would serve a good purpose, if it would save innocent lives, it wouldn't be a question at all. But if it would change nothing, it would be a needless sacrifice.

[But it's not likely to be that simple. Hell, even Kitty's isn't that simple, and she has at most a few seconds to act.]

It's a big "if" isn't it? [She knows that if well. So may ifs.] We have a lot of those between here and whatever is after here. If there is an after. [As much as she doubts the conventional wisdoms they drift around space with, that is something she does believe. That there will be an after. She just doesn't expect it to be of her own choosing. But she can hope. Dangerous, misleading, life-saving hope.]

It might be easier to know than to just worry anyway. About your situation at least. Even if it's hard to hear. And if it is especially bad I can give you some tips on effective break down strategies I used. Though they might not work if you can't get drunk.

Truly, it is. [And even more so because there's so little they can do to verify the information.

He exhales in a huff.]

Ah, no, I cannot become inebriated. I am prepared to face my destiny if I must.

[But it's clear from his expression that the idea is painful. And why shouldn't it be? He's been happy here. He has a home, friends. Family.

He's quiet for a bit.]

If you did stay, what would you do? Settle down on the planet? Take the ship and go exploring?

I knew a Destiny once. [Strictly speaking she really knew of her more so. But she was a precog, so pretty close to the concept of destiny? Maybe? But the comment is really not here nor there or very helpful. It's just some nonsense for a heavy subject.] It's a lot to be prepared for. It's okay if you're less prepared than you expected after. [She knows she was. Come hang out with her where the bar is super low!]

And if I stay... [A hard thing to picture even if it is the only sensible, life-affirming option available to her.] Exploring. Looking for Earth maybe. Whatever Earth might be out here.

We can prepare all we like, but I can't say how much it helps--if it helps at all.

[Morbid, so he's glad of the other subject and looks thoughtful.]

There must be one. I'm sure of it - look at all the references we've had. Even if it took a lifetime to find it again, it would be a journey worth going on.

I think it would feel better than settling here. ["Settling" isn't always a dirty word. Sometimes it sound nice with the right people...the right person. But it's hard to imagine even if the thought of going back to the hand-holding planet isn't the worst thing. She'd loved it there, but it might have been the company. It probably was.] Maybe that's just how I'm wired—always striving for some impossible goal or I don't know what to do with myself. With the highly unlikely end of one in sight already thinking of new ones.

What about you? Would you want to find Earth too?

[He smiles, his expression far off.]

I would like to settle somewhere. I find it unlikely, though. I have responsibilities on Earth. [Which is kind of an answer to both questions, really.]

But if I were truly free? I want a home.

It sounds appealing. [She's not sure if she believes in them anymore or if she's lousy with them.] What makes a home for you?

[He reaches over to give Kitty's arm a light squeeze.]

People are a large part of it. This ship has been a home to me, and it would not feel the same without people I care about on it.

[But it's not quite enough, and he pauses before continuing.]

I have also determined I prefer having enough room to fly, and I would like to stay in one place long enough for it to be familiar. So it would have all three: familiarity, room, people I care about. Having all three of them is a singularly uncommon experience in my life thus far.

[She gives him a little smile at the arm squeeze.]

It doesn't seem like it should be too much to ask for does it?

I think I'd just want it to last. [The last thing she'd ever expect it to do.] Okay, and the people too. [She doesn't know what home is except people anymore.]

One would hope. And yet, so it goes.

[He exhales and is quiet for a moment.]

The impermanence is by far the worst part of our current situation. I'd hardly mind traveling the galaxy, if I could count on my friends not disappearing at random.

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