driftfleet | food glorious food

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food glorious food

Who: Eugene Woods
Broadcast: Fleetwide video
Action: SS Vanquish
When: 7/6

[All right. Eugene guesses he's been here . . . man. Almost a month?

Wow, yeah. Time apparently flies when you're homesick, low-level angry, and relegated to a ship's kitchen.

He knows he has to crawl out of it sooner or later though. And since there's nothing he can do to find his people, or get himself back to him, he guesses it falls to just doing his job and figuring out this place he's stuck in. He's propped up his communicator to have a nice wide-angle view of the galley (let it never be said he doesn't have a sense for presentation when he puts his mind to it), where he's seated between the table and the workspace.]

Hi there everyone. For those of you I haven't met - i.e., most of you - I'm Eugene Woods. Cook of the good ship Vanquish. I know there are some talented engineers out there in the fleet, so if anyone's willing to take some commission work, I could use a few food-prep devices beyond what they give us. A basic dehydrator would open up a whole new world of edible protein options, for starters. And if anyone thinks they're up to slapping together a quick setup so I can start homebrewing? Even better. It's basic equipment, I promise, pretty DIY stuff. I'm just lacking the facilities here to sterilize everything. I don't have much more to trade than work and a portion of whatever I manage to make, but hey. Maybe we have some thirsty or snack-hungry inventors out there.

For everyone else-? Here. Toss out some recipe requests. I'll inflict the results upon my shipmates, or any lucky visitors, for your viewing pleasure. How's that for entertainment?

[Shipmates are, of course, welcome to come down to the kitchen. In addition to whatever the bored masses have been suggesting, Eugene's mixed up something vaguely resembling an udon soup with the dried fish, as well as some too-soft chili-peanut potato pancakes.]

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

[There are certain skills which an AI spending a large amount of time near Tony Stark acquires. Brewing techniques are among them, along with cheeseburger appreciation.]

I may be able to help. I'd guess brewer's yeast may be too much to ask, but what do you have in the way of raw food materials?

[His ship only has the protein gels, which are really not going to work for any kind of fermentation.]

Orange drink, potato flakes, white sugar.

[He half-smiles unrepentantly, shrugging a shoulder.]

Yeah, I know it's going to be prison hooch until I can get my hands on some real fruit or grain.

Depending on the starch quality of the potato flakes, an imitation vodka may be possible. Does your ship have a lab facility for potential distillation? If not, you could begin with a lower-content product.

We have a lab, but I'm not sure how distillation-ready it is.

[Even at his most sullen, Eugene drew the line at introductions to crewmates that amounted to hi there howyadon mind if I brew some moonshine in here.]

I'm assuming you're comfortable distilling, though. Because personally, I don't trust myself not to make people go blind with whatever I could put out there.

A lab facility would also be able to test the results of an experiment. One can never tell if the first batch will be drinkable by any means, but--yes, I am familiar with the theory.

I am also an engineer. A small-batch dehydrator would not be excessively difficult.

Small-batch, as in, could actually fit in the galley here? Because that would be great.

[Some things he's sure he'll want to work in large batches, especially if he's trading. But for pickier, more precise items, or even testing techniques? That sounds perfect.]

I believe so. It would make less than half a dozen servings, however. Anything larger would have to fit in a larger room, perhaps the cargo bay.

Hey, that's more than enough to test out recipes. I'm happy staying in the experimental stage until we iron the basics out.

[Dried food, vodka, whatever. Better not to pour all their effort into mass production until they had a better idea of what they were doing.]

Though I guess the basics include how I'm paying you back for all of this, huh.

Given the resources we have, we may be in that stage for some time. It's good to know you're willing.

[Pay back? The Vision smiles lightly.]

There is one thing. If you should ever find any onions, my captain would be most grateful.

[Funny request, but he obliges, albeit with a half-grin.]

Got it. Bulbs only, or is anything that tastes onion-y enough welcome?

[He shrugs.] She failed to clarify beyond "an onion", but I would imagine anything would be welcome. There isn't a terribly large variety available on our ship.

Good to see you're settling in.

[He smiles a bit, and the gap in his teeth shows.]

So uh... I might have something for you. You didn't commission it, but I like to make stuff, so I thought why not.

Oh- man, seriously?

[Premeditated gifting is something he's almost forgotten is a thing, was ever a thing - both because it usually involves available resources and the faith you'll be around whenever you plan on handing over the thing. Both of those are in rather shorter supply in the world post-civilization. He smiles uncertainly, slow in remembering how to respond to that.]

Thanks, that's - you really didn't have to.

Don't thank me just yet.

[He steps back so more of him is in view, along with the messy engine room and various projects. Hiccup gestures to a white sheet, then yanks it off to reveal--

-- what appears to be a prosthetic leg, complete with a supportive knee and a hookish foot for traction. The metal is a little discolored as it's made from scrap, yet polished. There are various gears and tiny pulleys visible in places. It's not quite real-looking, but this is still pretty advanced technology for a Viking. He's never made anything like this before.]

I'm going to have to make a few adjustments-- obviously-- since I didn't have the idea to take your measurements when we met.

...ohmigod.

[The response is very quiet, muffled behind the hand that Eugene's pressed to his face as he stares, disbelieving, at what's there on his communicator. Even on the tiny screen he can see that the thing is detailed, that there's more to the joints than just a hinge here or a spring there, and it's a few slow seconds before the first curl of his smile begins to overtake his fingers.]

You made that? Hiccup, that- damn, that's really impressive-

[And for him. An ankle and a knee and a shin and even a foot, after a fashion. for him, when by all rights he should be practically nobody to this guy.]

[Hiccup rubs at the back of his head. He's still going over the flaws in his head. He's already thinking he's going to have to tweak it more when Eugene actually gets fitted with it. The next one he makes will definitely be better.

Eugene saying his name brings his attention back to the screen.]

Really? I thought you would've had something more... high tech where you're from. This is probably nothing. Still-- I'm surrounded by stuff I've never seen before. I need to start learning.

[He smiles a bit.]

It's ready when you are. Actually-- I should probably come to you. The top part is adjustable for the thigh... I sorta eyeballed your height but I can mess with the screws down here [he gestures] to shorten or lengthen the leg.

Edited 2015-07-08 23:49 (UTC)

What? No! We can make it there, let me just- let me talk to the pilot as soon as he gets down here. Which ship are you on again?

[It's the most excited he's been since he got here, casting around the island for something to write on before he realizes that there isn't anything and looking back with a sheepish grin.]

We can be right over there. Soon as you're ready.

[He's going to make this happen. One way or another. Hiccup built a leg, the least he can do is twist the pilot's arm.]

The Bloodsport. Robin's the captain-- I'll let him know.

[He's excited, too. This is the first time he's ever made a prosthetic for someone who wasn't a dragon.]

I hope this works. I mean, it should, but you never know until you put it on.

[this guy, (tall, dark, and... actually really pale) is sitting in the captain's chair while he's scrolling through network posts--and this one's presented nice, and he likes a little challenge, so here he is!]

I'm going to guess without looking that someone's already jumped on the homebrewing setup... But I'd be happy to try the dehydrator. Anything to get a little more variety around here.

Sounds great, thanks! Cool air's preferable, but seriously. Anything that lets me start trying to fake some rice. I mean, who the hell stocks dried fish and no rice.

[boop! a video feed flicks on, and there's some pointy-eared kid's face smiling over it.]

Brewing? Like, for alcohol?

[And now an elf, apparently. With piercings. Bless the multiverse.]

That's the plan. Beer, wine, spirits if there's a way to do it and turn out a reasonably safe product. The sooner I can get my hands on some grain or fruit, the better.

What about, like... fruit-flavored stuff?

[he is obviously also a genius.]

[Eugene chuckles under his breath, canting an eyebrow.]

It might be awhile before our first space-daquiri, if that's what you're getting at.

[he mirrors the chuckle, a little awkwardly-- because yeah that already sounds smarter than what he'd actually meant.]

Well, like... you said you wanted fruit. And we don't have real fruit right now, I guess, but... we have fruit-flavored stuff...

[...and that's not the same, is it?]

Oh, like . . . the fruit drink?

[He looks doubtful, but does at least give the thing a moment's consideration. A very brief moment.]

I'm not sure exactly where that stuff comes from, but I'm pretty sure it's closer to a chemistry bench than a tree.

[he tried.]

Oh. Really?

...That's pretty gross.

[he's also taking that statement pretty literally. because hey, it might even be true.]

That's smart. I haven't really thought about kitchen gadgets.

[ and it sounds like it'd be something fun to tackle, if one is able to acquire the resources for them. ]

Let me know how the dehydrator works out for you?

Will do. It looks like the bright minds of the fleet are going to be working on kitchen-sized and large-batch models, so who knows. Maybe if that works out we'll really go crazy and start looking at food processors.

Food processors? I dunno, man, you might need to back up - you're dreaming a little big there, aren't you?

[ his shoulders shake with suppressed laughter. ]

Hey, hey. Today, shelf-stable noodles. Tomorrow- [He fans his hands out in an arc, like he's pitching a scheme that's just too grand to keep his elbows at his sides.] -smoothies.

I'll take on the mission of being a taste tester for all those recipes! My only condition is that I have the right to refuse it if it looks too sketchy.

[Shipmates they are, but Clay's not about to ruin his healthy eating habits too much for this very scientific experiment.]

Edited 2015-07-07 19:59 (UTC)

[Oh, hey, it's the . . . pilot. Right?]

I will be doing my best to keep the sketchiness to a minimum. And if you want to start early, I've already have some imitation udon and . . . basically African-inspired potato cakes?

[He turns the communicator to the offerings in question, the soup steaming on a low heat in its pot and the cakes plated as attractively as he can manage.]

. . . I'll be better at this once I get some actual spices, promise.

Oooh, those look good! So they're ready now? [Because Clay looks about ready to put the ship on auto-pilot and get him some of that stuff.]

Ready and still warm. Come down and let me know how it compares to the captain's cooking.

Noodles! You should make noodles! Spicy noodles!

[She likes noodles, okay?]

I have made some noodles, yeah! And there's a chili flavor, teriyaki, some peanut, and . . . chocolate? So I guess I'm faking something vaguely asian, kind-of satay, of mole-if-you-squint-just-right.

Peanut and chili is a great combination. Fusion cuisine is the best. As long as there are noodles.

There are indeed noodles. Are you coming over to sample? Or do I need to write up a review of my own cooking for you to read.

[It's gentle teasing, dry as it is, and he smirks mildly.]

Sure, I'd love to come over! I bet I can take a shuttle. I can drive anything just fine.

[Yay her new friend wants to hang out with her!]

I am partial to hot pies, myself! The sort you can hold in your hand and eat as you ride. Some are filled with meat and vegetables, but Yfandes always loved the ones with apples.

. . . pasties.

[The dawning understanding on his features gives way abruptly to a grin, and he nods, immediately in love with the idea.]

Why didn't I- absolutely! I'm sure I can hack a crust out of what we have here, and even if there's no fruit it's bound to be a better delivery method than- wow, how did I not think of that!

[Geez, years stuck in northern England and he'd practically forgotten pasties existed. Which probably said more about the state of post-civilization cooking than anything.]

_{[ He blinks, surprised at the other's enthusiasm for the idea, but he
could get behind it. He so did love hot pies. ]}

Well, such things are usually made for travel, so since we are rather stationary - while traveling, I know, but we are not wandering down a hot and dusty toad - it might not have come up as a concern.

Though I will happily volunteer as the taste tester when you have made your first batch!

[This gentleman is talking about Food. Jinx Approves of all conversations about Food.

Which is why she pops open a video window and stares out beseechingly at him. Let her be a part of your delicious world, good sir. She won't even sass you for the privilege. Food is even worthy of opening her mouth and trying Words.]

Crunch cubes.

[Like that flash-frozen fruit you could find back in NYC. Deliscious and tart. Lets get on this.]

Crunch cubes! Right.

[He claps his hands together and rubs them, slowing as his newfound food knowledge fails to pull up anything with that name.]

You're probably going to have to explain what those are.

[Okay, if he;s actually gonna try, she'll totally use words.]

Freeze-dried fruit.

[Yes, that may very well be the most syllables she has ever said to another person in the Fleet. Ratings spike anyone?]

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

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