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(no subject)

Who: Beverly Crusher and Friends!
Broadcast: No
Action: Blue Fish
When: October 13th

[Dr. Beverly Crusher, Personal Log, October 13, Seventh Month after arrival. Today is my birthday.

Theoretically.

With a sigh, Beverly stops typing. Normally, she is all about birthdays, both her own and everyone else's but today... frankly, today is weird. By her own calendar, her birthday should have been two months ago, yet time isn't flowing normally back home. Or time isn't flowing here normally. Or something. Damn alternate universes. And does it even matter when no one is aging anyway? She rubs her temples. This is too much to think about before breakfast (though admittedly, the vagaries of traveling through spacetime are better to focus on than the fact that there is no one from home to celebrate with in the first place).

Once she has some coffee in her, she comes to a decision. Real birthday or not, she's going to give herself a little holiday. Which means people aren't going to be seeing her around the dusty moon, or much at all really. After taking a nice long hot bath, and changing, for once, into something other than the fleet issued jumpsuits, she spends most of the day in her quarters, reading and listening to old letters on her tricorder. Even if she can't be with them today, she at least wants to hear Wesley and Jean-Luc and Deanna, surround herself with their voices. It doesn't make her as sad as it once did. Instead, she finds the recordings comforting, for the most part.

Late in the afternoon, however, she will emerge to set up shop in the kitchen where she's going to bake herself a cake! If anyone wants to find her (or that yummy smelling cake), that's where she'll be, humming a jazzy little tune as she cooks.]

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[Reaching across the table, Beverly takes Jennifer's hand in hers. This isn't exactly a revelation to Beverly, she's noticed Jennifer's tendency to keep to herself, but she never felt it was her place to say anything.]

It's tempting in a situation like this to shut yourself away. But I hope you know that you're always welcome here.

I appreciate that. I know at some point I'm just going to have to make myself do it. I miss my friends, but I've made new friends here- you, Wanda, Allen, my crewmates... you've all been wonderful.

Tell you what, next time I go to visit my friends on the Windrose, you should come with me! It wouldn't be anything too formal, probably just some drinks and card games.

I'd like that. I can even bring some of that cheap beer the sponsors gave me. [This is said with a wink.]

[She wrinkles her nose.]

I shouldn't speak for Natasha and Wrath, but as for myself, I think I'll pass on that offer.

Edited 2015-10-19 23:55 (UTC)

[She winked.]

It was worth a shot. Honestly, I should probably just get rid of it at this point. Maybe next time I'll actually get something useful.

I wouldn't count on it. In any case, there's something else I need some taste testers for, hopefully much better than Floot Beer, if you're interested...?

Absolutely. There a special occasion, or were you just in the mood for cake?

Ah... today is actually my birthday.

Well then, happy birthday. I wish I would have known! I would have gotten you something.

That's alright. It worked out anyway that you decided to visit today!

Well, next time we land on a planet, dinner's on me. I am glad I came over, though- I needed to stretch my legs a bit, so to speak. I love my ship and I get along with my crew, but sometimes getting away can help.

Mmm I know what you mean... these ships are so small. The Enterprise is home to over 1,000 people so sometimes I start feeling a little cramped in here.

Yeah, Atlantis was the same way. Even though it could fly, given enough power, it was still meant to be a city in and of itself. I miss having all that space, including in my infirmary. I'm not used to going it alone.

Me either. Today has been... an unusual birthday to say the least. The crew has been so sweet though, so that part is like home at least.

I'm glad. Even if you're not home, you're still surrounded by people who will support and celebrate with you. It's... a good feeling.

[Beverly doesn't answer, just smiles happily in response before getting up to cut Jennifer a slice of cake. It's a simple single layer yellow cake with homemade vanilla icing - though there's significantly less icing than she intended, given her and Sokka's competition earlier. Placing it on a plate, she brings it over to her friend.]

And thank goodness I'm surrounded by people more than happy to help me eat this thing.

There's that, too- thank you. Any occasion to have a cake is a good one. [She thought back to her sleeping/fainting spells and realized- she was surrounded by people who cared, too. Beverly, Steven, Davesprite, Wanda... and others.] Maybe if someone else comes to visit, I can get a start on this getting-to-know-people stuff, too.

I'm sure someone else will stop by... This kitchen attracts a lot of visitors it seems.

Then I'll stick around for a while. I'll figure things out yet... I'd just hoped that by now I'd know how to be social. But then, I didn't exactly have a normal childhood.

What do you mean?

[Her tone is curious, but not pressing.]

If it's alright to ask, I mean. I can't exactly say I like talking about mine either.

[Jennifer sighed a little and could feel herself going red.]

I was one of those genius kids. I skipped 3 grades in elementary school, was in college and had enough for a bachelor's degree before I was 18... so that left me in a weird position. I was a bit too young to relate to my classmates, but most people my age found it hard to relate to me. I never belonged anywhere, no matter where I ended up. I didn't have much of a social life 'til I was an adult and my friends on Atlantis made an effort to include me in things. So I guess I never learned how to be social, in a sense.

You sound like Wesley.

[She takes her seat again.]

I never worried about how he was doing in school or if he was getting into trouble... in fact, I worried he wasn't getting into enough trouble. He spent all his time alone, tinkering on some project or another, or with me or sometimes with some of the other senior officers, but rarely with kids his own age. I thought...

I thought I was partially to blame. I mean, having your mother as one of the senior officers, it's a little like being the principal's kid isn't it? But it wasn't that at all.

[Jennifer smiled softly.]

No, it wasn't you- any more than it was my parents who made me the way I am. When you're struggling to relate to people your own age but still at that stage where hanging out with adults is weird, sometimes it's hard to enjoy anyone's company but your own. Sometimes that's all you want. I mean, I hate to sound like a braggart, but really intelligent people tend to forget that not everyone sees things the same way or understands things as readily as they do. And when you're a child and even grown-ups can't follow you sometimes... [She shrugged.] Coupled with my aforementioned shyness, it made me stand out, not always in a good way. So I retreated in on myself a lot. It was easier than trying to talk to people.

[This makes a her a little sad to hear, not just for Jennifer, but for Wesley too. Even now, when he's found what he wants to be, where he belongs, he's still so isolated. Beverly reaches across the table for Jennifer's hand.] If it's any help, I don't know anyone else in the fleet I feel more at home with than you.