gotta get down for a mingle

[redactions]

Who: The crew of the SS Heron and visitors.
Broadcast: nope.
Action: Aboard the SS Heron.
When: After returning to the ship.

[ finally back on the right ship, except the corridors are all mysteriously cold and the ship seems smaller. Thanks, Atroma. New crew, visitors, starters in comments ]

Comments

[redactions]

[ Perhaps that one thing is Steve being found in her world, and Steve and her getting the life they deserve. Jim doesn't even hesitate. He scribbles latitude and longitude on a piece of paper and hands it to her. ]

Don't tell Steve. The other me, you can look for later. He'd agree.

[mucked]

[ she holds the paper between her fingertips. and she's ashamed to see it tremble -- it's a selfish request, but it's one she doesn't make lightly. peggy puts a crisp fold in the paper. she pockets it, and vows to herself that it is (at most) an insurance policy against the darkness. if the pressures of this new shield become too overwhelming, and she's forced to question her place at its head, then she'll have something she can trust in her back pocket. coordinated to be memorized.

a slow nod. ] Luckily, keeping secrets is a specialty of mine.

[ even with steve. ]

[redactions]

[ He moves towards her, his flesh hand curling lightly over her wrist. Soft, ]

You've waited long enough.

[mucked]

[ she swallows the greater portion of her emotion. and she doesn't pull away from her friend's touch -- these are the moments that keep her grounded, and which remind her of the stakes. the scale of it all.

peggy appreciates how she's never had to say the words out loud. jim already knows how fibre-deep her feelings have become for captain rogers. ]

Not as long as he has. [ she shakes her head. ] And then -- God, here he is.

[redactions]

[ Still soft, ]

You doin' all right?

[mucked]

I've been worse. [ and she can't precisely say she's been 'better'. that, there, is the rub. why should this place offer her so much when its premise is so rotten? ] I thought I was seeing things...back on the Marsiva. I want to say he hasn't changed a bit, but --

That's my sentimentality talking. And not my pragmatism.

[ there must be a change somewhere beneath all that familiarity. look at bucky; look how he's different. ]

[redactions]

We've all changed.

[ That's his sentimentality and pragmatism, but this isn't the time for nostalgia. ]

Somethin' you noticed about him, in particular?

[mucked]

[ a mild hum. she allows a mild shrug to infect her posture. ] He was always bold. But now? [ she won't be so crass as to explain the bewildering kiss in the hallway -- because explaining it would also require explaining the one she'd initiated before steve took to the valkyrie. and some moments are meant to stay private. ]

Bold, still, but of a different variety. A different breed of boldness.

[redactions]

[ might also make his little shipper heart explode, just saying. ]

Bold, huh?

[ Steve hadn't seemed bold at all — just more withdrawn, the walls around him higher and more difficult to scale. He puts this away to look at it later. ]

[mucked]

More hungry.

[ but her voice betrays nothing. that sort of boldness that's born in desperation. ]

[redactions]

[ This line of thinking is lost on him. Jim frowns. ]

Well. Guess we'll see just how much.

[mucked]

[ his frown (paradoxically) makes her smile. a quiet smile, edged with anticipation and just a hint of something...sweeter. were it any other topic, she might have put jim out of his curious misery and explained every tent-pole of her verdict. but, as it was...! he and steve are-were-could-be the dearest of friends, and she would not deprive the two boys of their friendly chatter. let steve tell him, she decides. if he wants to. ]

Oh, I hope so. And meanwhile I'll try not to be too pleased he's been shanghaied alongside the rest of us.

[redactions]

[ This is like some infuriating code he can't crack, and he'll just bother Steve about it later. ]

You'n me both.

[mucked]

Are we allowed our selfishness, you think? Just this once. [ or just this twice as she feels the weight of folded paper in her pocket. ]

[redactions]

[ He grumbles, and lets it go. ]

Just this once, Pegs.

[mucked]

[ -- something in his grumbling is a comfort. he is so one of the commandos; she can hear their set-upon humour in him. the long-suffering and the long-lasting. ]

He'll be joining you lot here on the Heron, won't he? [ she hasn't been told anything -- hasn't heard anything. she's merely guessing. assuming. ]

[redactions]

For visits. I think he's staying on the Bloodsport for now.

[mucked]

Hm. Unexpected. [ ... ] I thought he'd be chomping at the bit to be -- well, nearer. [ peggy doesn't hide the mental calculations behind her eyes. ] Is it because of the Winter Soldier?

[redactions]

No trouble in Paradise, you shouldn't worry.

[ His mouth quirks up reflexively, a consequence of her concern — even as she calculates visibly. ]

We're just working a few things out.

[mucked]

[ working things out... ]

Is that why he's billeting in the cargo bay?

[redactions]

What? No he just doesn't like the bunks. Bed's too soft, and it's cold.

[mucked]

[ bed's too soft... ]

He reminds me of a guard-dog, out there. Pacing the place with his gaze. Sentry duty.

[redactions]

Probably how he likes it.

[ We all want to be useful. ]

[mucked]

Oh, likely enough. [ in the wake of the war, she could be accused of the same desire to be precisely that: useful. it did (on occasion) get her into trouble. ]