preformthisneigh: (Sure I'll humour you)
Cheese Sandwich ([personal profile] preformthisneigh) wrote in [community profile] driftfleet2015-12-21 10:46 pm

003 - Weasel Stomping Day

Who: Cheese Sandwich and YOU
Broadcast: Fleetwide
Action: Bishop
When: Tonight!

[Cheese appears on the video feed, BEAMING excitedly. He's in the Bishop's cargo hold, which has been decorated with paper chains and vaguely Christmasy (but not TOO Christmasy) decorations, tinsel, little lights, you know the drill. There's also a single card behind him, because ALLEN remembered and now he is the best. Good job, Allen.]

Happy Hearthswarming Eve everypony! This is a special holiday where I come from where we celebrate the founding of our country. We have this big feast the day after and raise the flag of Equestria BUT tonight is even more important, because it's when we get together and have parents to tell the story. I'm the only pony here so ...uh you just got me, but hey, we work with what we got.



Okay! So a long, long time ago, the three pony tribes lived in an uneasy peace. None of them liked the others, but they had to work together to survive. The unicorns raised the sun and moon, the pegasi controlled the weather and the Earth ponies grew the crops. The unicorns and pegasi demanded more and more food from the Earth ponies for their services, more than the Earth ponies could afford to give without starving themselves, and so the three tribes started to bicker and fight over who had more right to the food.

[He grabs some cotton wool which make an interesting fake snow and starts spreading it about him.]

As they argued more and more, a magical storm started to gather. It got worse and worse, until they realised they had to hold a summit, to try and garner a peace between their tribes. The three leaders of the tribes got together, along with their three advisors.

[They all had names, but that's not important in the telling, not when he wants to make it easy for other species to understand.]

They didn't find peace, though, they only argued more, and it was decided that the three tribes would split up, and find their own land away from the others. And so, they all set off on a treacherous journey, and soon they escaped the deadly storm.

One day, they found a perfect place, good food, good water, it was the best possible land ever. Unfortunately they all found it at the same time, and as they fought over who got bagises on the new land, the magical storm came again, forcing them to all hide in a cave to avoid it. They kept fighting, and the storm followed them inside, freezing the three leaders in ice, and threatening to do the same to the advisors!

DUN DUN DUN! For the kids, don't worry, this is the scariest part. He picks up a stick, with a carboard cut-out of a strange horse-like creatures

One of the advisors suddenly realised what was causing the storm. Windigos! Magical creatures that thrived on hatred and anger! The three advisors huddled together and admitted they never disliked one another, and they would rather be friends and equals. The unicorn advisor suddenly let out a burst of magic, which formed a heart, we call it the Fire of Friendship. It shot the windigos away and as the three got closer and began to tell stories and sing song through the night, the snow and ice melted away.

Soon the three leaders melted, too, and learned what had caused the storm. They decided they were stronger together, and decided they would live in the new land equally. They called it Equestria and it still stands to this day.

And that's how Equestria came to be. Thank you, thank you, don't forget to tip your waiter.

[Bishop Crew]

Hey guys! Look under your beds and then come meet me in the cargo bay! Another tradition this time of year is that everypony living together that day puts their own little hoof-made doll of themselves on the hearth to signify togetherness and all that good stuff. We haven't got a hearth but hey, we can make do with some...boxes or something, right?

[And sure enough, under their beds will be a little crocheted doll of themselves. It's not a bad likeness actually.]
experiencepoints: (pic#9614691)

action

[personal profile] experiencepoints 2015-12-21 11:25 pm (UTC)(link)
[Nightingale is extremely confused by this, but she's still obediently reporting to the bay, doll in hand. It's a bit awkward after their last conversation, but she is at least trying to be civil.]

Not that I'm not flattered, but how did you make these with hooves...?

[... 'trying' being the key word.]
falconing: ( chewie ) (right hand wookiee.)

[personal profile] falconing 2015-12-21 11:26 pm (UTC)(link)
[ han has swindled half the galaxy and seen countless species aside from his own. hell, his best friend is a giant walking carpet. that being said, he's never been introduced to a talking pony, nor seen a talking pony, and -- ]

The Fire of Friendship?

[ SORRY THAT IS LITERALLY THE ONLY THING HE FINDS RIDICULOUS ]
experiencepoints: (Why no sir I have not seen a penis.)

[personal profile] experiencepoints 2015-12-21 11:36 pm (UTC)(link)
Oh, uh... Yeah. Happy Hearthswarming Eve. Is there some other traditional thing to say here or something?

[She questions everything, okay. At least she decides that she really doesn't want to know more on how the dolls were made, instead focusing on trying to do this right. She may not get along with Cheese, but she at least doesn't want to ruin his holiday for him.

She also hasn't quite noticed he actually used her name this time.]
falconing: (i'm trying to fucking fly here)

[personal profile] falconing 2015-12-21 11:38 pm (UTC)(link)
[ holy shit ]

Friendship is a magical force. That does... something.

[ holy shit han didn't think he could find something more ridiculous than the force but it has happened ]

You've got to be kidding me.
experiencepoints: (Same thing we do every night Pinky.)

[personal profile] experiencepoints 2015-12-21 11:54 pm (UTC)(link)
It's no problem. Just... Let me know how to do this? I'm pretty sure I've celebrated anything at all... once. In my life.
falconing: (captain han solo.)

[personal profile] falconing 2015-12-22 12:05 am (UTC)(link)
[ in fairness, it almost sounds like the force, but... friendship? as some kind of invisible force that can apparently kill you? maybe it's the name that has him stuck, but -- ]

... remind me to never go to the pony planet.

[ leia and luke are also banned from going there. ]

Can you use this ... magic friendship?

[ god this is so stupid can he lock this conversation what if leia or luke (or even worse, chewbacca) shows up and sees this stupidity ]
ishere: (59)

action

[personal profile] ishere 2015-12-22 12:07 am (UTC)(link)
[ omfg this actually looks like him. tadashi is wicked impressed as he wanders into the cargo bay. ]

You did a really great job with this.
unfulfilledpotential: (concerned here)

video

[personal profile] unfulfilledpotential 2015-12-22 02:06 am (UTC)(link)
Those poor Earth ponies.

[Because clearly that was the real takeaway message from this story.... He's been here long enough to not be concerned by talking horses, but dear GOD those poor Earth ponies.]

But uh, thanks for sharing your holiday with us. Is there anything we can do tomorrow to help?
kill_switch: (how every single word you spoke)

video

[personal profile] kill_switch 2015-12-22 04:41 am (UTC)(link)
[She gives Cheese an odd smile, at the same time perplexed and saddened.] What a world, where actual love wins wars.

[It's a fleeting moment, though, and she's back to something a little more pragmatic, if no less nostalgic.] Your story reminds me of the History Men and Women of my world.
experiencepoints: (Just imagine Sieg and Hana's baby.)

[personal profile] experiencepoints 2015-12-22 05:54 am (UTC)(link)
Like this?

[She just levitates her doll over to sit next to Cheese's.]
dancingmd: (smile)

text??? sort of?

[personal profile] dancingmd 2015-12-22 02:56 pm (UTC)(link)
[Since she never got Cheese's birthday out of him... well, this is clearly an important holiday for his people, so he will find a little chocolate cake for him in the fridge, along with a simple, but elegant card:]

To: Cheese Sandwich
From: Beverly

Happy Hearthswarming!
actsmagnificent: (shoulder)

action

[personal profile] actsmagnificent 2015-12-22 08:47 pm (UTC)(link)
[ It took a while, but Haruka's doll has appeared on some boxes in the cargo bay! And there is some motion in the doorway, as if someone just came in here for something and now is trying to leave without being seen.

Whoever could it be?? ]
falconing: ( chewie ) (right hand wookiee.)

[personal profile] falconing 2015-12-23 12:11 am (UTC)(link)
[ elements of harmony.

god, han wishes luke were here, because then han could prove why the force initially sounded so goddamn ridiculous. ]


So you're ruled over by these pony things that can kill you with friendship and some of you can't even fight back with the same thing?

[ DIDN'T HE LITERALLY JUST GO THROUGH A TRILOGY ABOUT THIS ]

That sounds like a crock, kid.

[ are you a kid. are you like 1,000 years old. what are you, actually. ]
incousinswithyou: right here. these two fingers. (I got what you want)

action

[personal profile] incousinswithyou 2015-12-23 05:07 am (UTC)(link)
[here's Michiru poking her head into the cargo bay]

Happy Hearthswarming Eve. [at least she is capable of playing nice. Even if she's hoping he put those there before bedtime, and not in the middle of the night. She's not sure she wants to explain the level of 'snuggling' involved between her and Haruka.]

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