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Who: Celeste Blackwell and anyone!
Broadcast: Fleetwide
Action: SS Golden, p much the most aimless of wandering
When: Day(?)break Jan 10

[Celeste's arrival a day earlier was essentially passed in a whirlwind of cold shock. Everything was so wrong, so alien, and she was already riding a wave of grief following her departure from Eudio; she expected to see her dorm room, the not exactly welcoming but familiar walls of BIAPA, and instead she found a bloody spaceship.

She also found the truth, thanks to it being broadcast in a loop until she could hear the sound ringing through her head even as she tried to sleep, but it wouldn't sink in. This was wrong. It was either a mistake or a betrayal. By the time she was being swept off once again, apparently assigned to a more permanent lodging, she'd come to a decision: Eudio had until the next morning to correct this. If she didn't wake up back in the city or in England, then she had been betrayed and used and lived over half a year of her life in service of a lie.

She woke up (apparently she did sleep, although it felt like it couldn't have been more than a minute or two) in space. And that's when she broke.

Fellow members of the SS Golden can find her wandering the ship, but she doesn't look like she's getting her bearings: her shuffling around is more ghostlike, lost and distant, eyes perpetually red and swollen whether she's crying in that exact moment or not. Sometimes she'll open her mouth as though she's about to start a rant, anger flashing across her face, but then she'll just look helpless again a second later. She's lost so much, two entire lives, for nothing, and now she honestly can't find her way into starting this one. She doesn't know what any of it means.]

[Eventually, Celeste finds her words and settles on an emotion to guide her as she addresses the entire fleet. Her eyes are still rimmed with red, her face a bit puffy from crying, but her expression is hard and ice cold and her stare is furious.]

I've got one thing to tell you lot, and one thing only. [A quiet voice accented with the sound of middle-class London, rubbed raw from crying but taut with rage yet to explode.] If you're ever approached by someone offering a wish - I don't care if a genie pops out of a bottle or a fairy godmother appears in a shower of sparkles or a star comes right out of the sky or it's just two civil servant sorts in smart suits, any sort of person - if they tell you that you can make things right, you can fix all your cock-ups and get your life on a proper track - even if there's a cost, no matter if the cost seems reasonable and this all feels like a very fair exchange -

[The icy mask over her features slips for a second, and it looks like she might be back on her way to tears, but then it's back.]

- no matter how bad it is, and how desperately you want to believe - trust your gut. Wishes like that don't come true. There's no correcting what's already happened. You don't get that sort of second chance, not from anyone, for anything.

It if sounds too good to be true, it is. Don't let any false promise convince you otherwise, or you deserve what you get.

[She sniffles, then looks rather annoyed with herself at having given away even that much and closes things off:]

That's it. That's all I have to say.

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[It's a look that would've appealed to her immediately, back in Eudio, all the markers of rebellion and power wrapped into one image. But she's far from looking at anyone with interest right now, with things as they are.]

I don't mince words when it's important. [That's razor-sharp, but a second later, she looks to be falling apart - it's that wording. What'd you lose. What didn't she lose?]

I lost - everything. But it was supposed to be the means to an end, and it became all I wanted. Now I don't even have the end.

[Robin, on the other hand, is very interested. he's not even trying to make things worse, necessarily, it's just that... in a sense, he's a sculptor, and someone's just handed him a lump of wet clay.]

And what the fuck are you supposed to do with a ruined past and a missing future, right? I get it.

[he shrugs a little, sounding pretty calm compared to her mess of emotions.]

I mean, I know it doesn't amount to much from a total stranger, but you're at least not the only one who's made a shitty decision to try and fix old mistakes. It's messy and awful.

[A ruined past and a missing future. His words are still cutting right through her, leaving her resolve to appear furious and defiant in ribbons.]

And a sweet dream right in the middle that seems to mean nothing now.

[There's a long moment where she hides her face in her hands, shoulders shaking a bit, but her eyes are like black marbles despite the puffy redness around them when she uncovers it. She obviously has endless reserves of fight in her, even as she's breaking down.]

At least it was my decision. The first I ever made completely and totally for myself, without anyone else's sway. That's still got to count for something. [And her lips start to tremble again.] Even if I appear to be right back to being dragged about by the currents of other peoples' decisions again. I made one choice for myself.

[he waits patiently while she holds her face in her hands, letting her come back up for air all on her own. he listens, thinks for a moment, and nods.]

It counts for a lot. You're stronger now than you were before, right?

[he gestures as if laying out a point in front of them.]

And even the biggest mistakes can have value, if you learn how to use them. This place isn't very... direct or fast-paced, so you've got time to figure out what to do next.

[She thinks of all the people who told her she was going to be alright no matter what happened. Caleb. Jem. Bliss. And the fact that she has that reserve of memory, all those people fighting in her corner no matter what universe they're in, proves him right.]

You're bloody well right I am. [There's a more quiet strength in that, less like she has to tell herself as much as him.]

Well, that's something, at least. I'm quite used to that. Or rather, that's how it started out in Eudio as well - I was more busy than I could've imagined when I left. But I've got the knack of figuring out how to make a life for myself now.

[and that makes him smile. what good eyes she has; she's staring to remind him of one of his sisters, what with the simmering fury that fueled pretty much everything she ever did.]

There you go. I think you're gonna be all right.

[he leans back, waves his hand casually.] So with all that, you eaten anything yet? The protein machines ain't thrilling, but they'll keep you from falling over.

[Eaten. God. What a perfectly normal thing to do, which makes it sound almost surreal in this new context. But then, just as she's settling into the normalcy: protein machines.]

Oh fucking hell, what are they passing off as food here? "Protein machines" tells me far too much and not nearly enough all at once.

[crying is all well and good, but hard-learned lessons and life philosophy are no replacement for food and water! with a laugh:]

Welcome to the great mystery. I got a friend who jokes that it's made of recycled passengers or something, [EYEROLL.] but he's a fuckhead. It's just a bunch of basic nutrients put into a bland semi-solid. Kind of like...

[he... looks to the side as he tries to remember that that's called. he hasn't had it in years...] ...Tofu? Have you ever had tofu?

That's just what this place needs, Soylent Green. It really puts a bow on the entire package.

[Her nose wrinkles a little at the comparison, because that's about what she was thinking, sadly.]

Yes, of course I've had tofu, but generally... prepared. Dressed up somehow. You don't just serve a block of plain tofu.

I don't get that reference, but I'm sure it was hilarious.

[which he has gotten very used to saying over the last year or so. you people and your Earth nonsense...]

Anyway, if you don't like the plain stuff, you're always welcome to try the flavors... Peanut butter is awful and the cheddar's just atrocious, but the bacon flavor has been growing on me.

Oh, it's just one of those film spoilers that's so well known that people are born with the knowledge after awhile, you needn't even see the film itself. Rosebud is his sled, Tyler Durden isn't real, Verbal Kint is Keyser Soze, Soylent Green is people. I wouldn't actually watch Soylent Green yourself if you ever got the chance, it looks absurd.

[And consider that his warning not to get her started on movies or pop culture, one he should definitely heed.]

I'm not sure which is worse, no flavour or artificial flavour. I'll consider myself warned on peanut butter and cheddar, though. [And then she blinks, looking a bit startled, and snaps back to the previous conversation.] Fucking hell, I'd completely forgotten people can come from different eras in these sorts of places. I've ruined some brilliant films for anyone from the same Earth who might be listening.

Edited 2016-02-07 18:36 (UTC)

[oh, but. he looks so delighted at the topic of movies. he came across the Rosebud thing once! it didn't make much sense without context, but he likes being able to recognize these things all the same...

and her sudden realization has him laughing, and he says as if to a larger audience:] Everyone stop watching this conversation, she's ruining everything... Culture and cinematic history right out the window.

[and unfortunately he will not heed this warning. at all.]

Media from Earth does keep popping up around here, so maybe that's a legitimate concern. Meanwhile, I haven't seen a scrap of Gratian fiction since I got here... [shrugs, smiiiles.] So Avistal was crazy the whole time, the airship was actually a metaphor for artificially enforced social status, and "Astern" was the name of the town where she grew up.

You don't understand, The Usual Suspects is - god, there's never been a better twist ending, not in any universe! I could cut out my tongue for that, and maybe I'd better before I spoil The Sixth Sense or bloody Titanic or something by accident.

[Hey. There were people on Earth who were genuinely shocked by the Titanic sinking in that film. If someone from another universe stumbled across it and had already heard, the whole thing would seem pointless, and it's one of the very few romantic movies that's ever reduced Celeste to tears. Not one to miss.]

Oh, that is a shame. Eudio was very Earth-dominated that way as well, it's such a waste to have people from all these universes about and none of their media for us to experience. Of course, even if I did find any of yours, you've clearly ruined the best bits for me now anyway - but turnabout is fair play.

[This is fun. She's actually having so much fun. All the panic, the rage, the betrayal... they're not gone, of course, but they've been put on the backburner to simmer for now. The power of a kindred spirit.]

[that's him. he's a helper. and he really does think he's found a nice one here; they're probably more alike than she realizes.]

Truly menaces, aren't we? The network will never be safe again.

[which he says in jest, of course, before leaning forward and propping his chin on his hand to say something a little more important.]

Especially if you're this sharp after a bad day. Bet you knock 'em dead on a full night's sleep. Got a name I can call you?

I do like to keep on my toes, and do the same for others.

[She's got a warm smile for him at that, though, because he's really helped to jolly her out of her panic for the time being. Perfectly, as if he knew her much better than anyone ever could at this point. She's not the type to let that kind of instant familiarity go too far, but it is a comfort.]

I've been called all manner of names, but I prefer Celeste. And you?

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