driftfleet | (no subject)

Who: Obi-Wan Kenobi
Broadcast: Text
Action: Iskaulit
When: Jan 30th

A: TEXT

I think it's time I retire from teaching for a while.

I don't suppose anyone knows a decent way to pass the time?

B: ACTION

[ When Stefan announced the prayer room, a quiet place for meditation, Obi-Wan had been thrilled. While he enjoyed and cared for the Huntress, quiet is not something they are known for. After talking to Anakin, he knew he was in dire need of quiet and inner peace

He does not regret ( he can not regret )

And yet.

In a way he had envisioned as a child, it had always been Master and Padawan, together. Even when separate, they fought together, learned together, believed in each other. But Qui-Gon died all too soon, and for so long, Obi-Wan threw his hands up against tradition. When Yoda told him to be Anakin's master, he chose to be Anakin's friend. He did not caution against attachment, only warned where it might lead.

He breathes heavily, his legs folded on the mat. It's not working. The Force is still too quiet, too alien at this moment. It doesn't understand his sorrow.

Obi-Wan chuckles, opening his eyes and pushing his hair back. It should be used to that by now.

Looking down at his hands, he's quiet when he speaks. ]

Please help me.

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I'm sorry to hear it.

[So she'll ask about the Force some other time. That's...probably for the best.]

There's someone in the Fleet trying to collect books. That might be a useful direction to put your energies.

I'm afraid I lack confidence in my teachings of late.

Collecting books? Yes, I believe I had heard that somewhere. Do you know who it is?

I don't know if it's any comfort, but having seen what you did for Luke, I think they must still have value.

He said his name was Sam. Let me see if I can find the announcement he made.

[A few minutes later, she sends him the link.]

[Allen didn't draw attention to it, but he was a regular visitor to the prayer room. He had been the one that pointed Stefan in the direction of building one, after all. This place certainly wasn't the Order, but it helped ease those pangs of illness for a home long gone for Allen.]

[Truthfully, Allen had been aware of Obi-wan's presence the whole time, but he had made sure not to disturb him - opting to sit in a corner where his own presence was not disruptive. It was utterly rude to disturb someone in the middle of prayer or meditation, after all. Only when he speaks up, clearly having a crisis of pain, does Allen decide that perhaps it'd be best to say something.]

What troubles you, sir?

. . . Thank you, Leia. I'm glad I could do something for Luke. And you.

I remember him. It shouldn't be a problem to contact him.

[ His expression is unguarded and he struggles to push his feelings down. But then, it's a little late for such things.

Obi-Wan relaxes, albeit, a little. ]

A great many things, I'm afraid. Did I disturb you?

What you did for us, you did for the whole galaxy.

If I think of anything else, I'll let you know, but keeping busy hasn't been my strong suit here.

And if you do change your mind in the future--about teaching, that is--please let me know.

-- What are your feelings on cryptic crosswords?

[ Suddenly he felt very silly. Here are people who looked up to him, and he was behaving . . . childishly. He promised Luke he would train him. He cannot balk now from a little pain.

This was no different from promising Qui-Gon. Teaching was a privilege. And he was naught but someone to pass it along. ]

Leia. I would be honoured to take you as a student. But as a teacher, I feel I must better myself until I am ready to honour you.

I need to be better.

I can't say I have a lot of experience with those.

An ideal new hobby, then.

I suppose one must start somewhere.

Where would I procure them?

[Ahsoka is heading silently into the prayer room for some meditation herself when she spots Obi-Wan in front of her... and hears those words coming from his mouth. She stops a few metres behind him, frozen in place.

She's almost certain those words are not directed at her. Which means she's stumbled on to a private moment between Obi-Wan and the Force. Immediately, she feels like an intruder. She should go.

But if Obi-Wan is having some sort of crisis, if he needs someone to talk to... shouldn't she offer to be there for him? Won't he feel worse, if he senses her here and then she runs away? But then, what if she's the last person he wants to speak to? And honestly, what could she possibly say that would help? Obi-Wan is a Jedi Master. She's only a padawan. An ex-padawan. It's presumptuous to think that she knows better than him.

All this races through Ahsoka's head in an instant, but she still dithers. Hesitation and compassion in equal measures waver around her in the Force like a beacon.]

I've a book of them. I could copy a few out for you, if you like. All it'll cost you is an introduction.

[ she lies (a little) but when first meeting someone, it's best not to boast about creating your own crypic crosswords. ]

[ Audio on her end, but she won't mind receiving text from Obi-Wan's side. ]

...Sometimes I draw to pass the time.

I couldn't ask you to do anything except what you felt was best, General. I trust that you'll know when the time is right.

[Considering her ambivalence towards the Force, she doesn't strictly mind waiting.

And then, as explanation:]

I was going to ask Luke, but I can't feel his presence anymore.

[ It chimes, like bells in the wind. Ahsoka was here. Equal parts of shame and bitterness course through him for appearing in such a state, but he dismisses it. This was Ahsoka. She had seen him in far worse situations.

He takes a few seconds to use his breathing techniques. When a brief calm washes over him, Obi-Wan turns to her with a brief smile that doesn't reach his eyes. ]

You might as well come over.

[ Whelp. He pauses in his reply to reach into the Force . . . nothing. And that was strange for someone as powerful as Luke. Was he planet-side? ]

I do not sense him either. Should we search for him?

I'd be happy to oblige.

My name is Obi-Wan Kenobi. I'm a Jedi. And who might I be addressing?

We should, but I'm not sure it'll make much difference.

[She has a feeling he's gone--and if Luke could advise her, she thinks he'd tell her to trust it.]

Peggy Carter. First mate over on the Starstruck. It's a pleasure, Mister Kenobi.

[ Does Luke have a habit of vanishing?

Well. He is a Jedi Master, of sorts. ]

I'll keep an eye out anyway. To see it through.

Are you all right?

[ Ah, it was the little girl who wanted to meditate. And was going through her own pain. He puts aside his own feelings for now, and obliges her with a voice message in turn.

It was only polite. ]

What do you like to draw?

Not at all.

[He shakes his head and offers a smile.]

Back home I lived with the church for some time, so I just like coming here when I feel a little homesick. [In other words, he wasn't in the middle of prayer or meditation]

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