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(no subject)

Who: Everybody who hates this moon! And a few that don't!
Broadcast: Nope
Action: The Good Ship Iskaulit
When: Throughout the Toxic Moon event

[Y'all, Misty can't be the only one who hates this place, so let's all gather on the Iskaulit, safe from all that dark and rot down on the polluted moon and have ourselves a good time!

(Or at least, a pollution-free time).

A list of establishments on the Iskaulit can be found here!]

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So, she's selfish and doesn't play well with others? [It's not the worst thing. Probably. Though she could understand where it would be especially hard on people who need her like Rogue and Kurt. She's not sure that's all there is to it, but a place to start maybe.]

[Uh... maybe. If you took that to an extreme and like... amplified the extreme.

And then amplified that...

Yeah, she can't think of a kinder solution, not without digging deep into wounds she's not ready to lay bare. She shuts her eyes.]

More like... she looks at everyone as tools in the light of some undefined goal. You remember how I told ya we were fightin' Apocalypse back home?

[She pauses for a moment just looking at her.] Rogue, are you about to tell me she works for Apocalypse? [She doesn't want to feel anything about anything until she knows. Just waiting.]

I'm tellin' you she works for herself, even if it looks like she's workin' for someone else. [Straightening up, Rogue looks directly at Kitty.] An' I'm the one they used ta wake him up.

[Just - get the hard part over with first. Yes, brainwashed, she knows, she knows, but that didn't change the fact that she'd been used to go against people she trusted, people who trusted her, who'd looked out for her and accepted her and not only stolen their powers against their will, but fed them to the insane ancient mutant who wanted to rule the world.]

Rogue. [Voice softer and eyes worried.] I'm sorry. [If she expected any anger or resentment she won't find it. Rogue said "used" and she's taking her at that word.]

[What can she do but shrug at that. She had to get through this now, tell Kitty the whole thing, let her make up her own mind.]

She made it happen when my mental defenses were next ta nothin'. I don't know if she broke them down on purpose, or if it was just coincidence, but she outright handed me ta Mesmero. I was under his control for days. [A muscle in her cheek twitches.] Had me attack the X-Men, the Brotherhood, an' Acolytes... don't know how many more if Magneto hadn't caught the attack on tape. Then they brought me to Tibet, woke him up...

[She shuddered. She couldn't help it. The violation she'd felt as Apocalypse had ripped through her brain, absorbing those psyches she'd gathered for himself...] ...an' he ripped them right back out of me. Went from almost a mummy ta a superpower right in front of my eyes, an' I couldn't stop it.

[She exhaled through her nose, her body tense and ready to spring out and do -- something. But there wasn't anything she could do. Not about this. And not about any of the even more personal betrayals Mystique had found a way to do over and over again.]

[She can't quite place Mesmero, but from the codename and context it's easy enough to figure out what he was doing. She watches Rogue with concerned eyes, but her body is tensing. How could Mystique do that? The woman could be ruthless, sure. It was a pretty common trait back home. You had to be to survive even if the last year has helped to curb some of those tendencies in Kitty. She could almost understand her using someone this way if it was to stop Apocalypse, but to wake him? And with her own daughter? Does Kurt know?]

That's awful and not your fault.

[She reaches a gloved hand out to place over Rogue's wondering if it will even make contact. It's not always easy to accept comfort. One of the last moments she shared with her own Rogue was phasing when the woman tried to touch her after her students died.]

Trust me, I know whose fault it is.

[Her tone was dark and wry, but she allowed the touch, if only for a space of heartbeats before shifting her hand away.

It was Mystique's fault.

But if she hadn't been born this way, it wouldn't have happened.

So. There was that.]

So, ya can imagine how thrilled I am she's here.

I'm guessing you want to throw her out of the nearest airlock. [She felt that way about Beast and he didn't even deserve it. But he was also nothing to her. This woman raised her at least in part.]

Yes'n no. [She looks straight ahead.] Matricide's kinda a hard thing ta live with.

[She would know.]

[Kitty nods.] You still care about her too? [Only half a question. She assumes she does.]

Not that simple. [She glances away. She continues almost in spite of herself.] I grew up with a lie. I care for that person, but she never really existed. [Where does that leave her?] Doesn't change the fact that Mystique was still the actor.

...You're sure it was all a lie? [Kitty has to wonder because she was from a world where those feelings were genuine. At least she had every indication they were.]

[Rogue slowly slid her gaze to look at Kitty. She didn't say anything. This was not an area where trespassing was welcome, nor was it an area she felt comfortable in offering any explanation; her reasons were too personal, too painful, too deep.

It might have been too complicated for a simple yes or no answer, but the complications didn't matter. Actions mattered. Mystique's actions had proven any care she'd demonstrated for the eight years of Rogue's life where Mystique had been Rogue's sole caregiver to be exactly the kind of care one gives an asset or a... particularly well-tended plant. The sort of plant you intend to enter into a competition; a blue ribbon plant. There may be some affection there, but a plant is still a plant.

Rogue outgrew her roots.]

Okay. [Getting that she reached the wall there and she needed to read the no trespassing sign and take heed.]

Have you...shared any of this with Kurt? [Because he should know and it's not her place.] Mine.

[Rogue is relieved Kitty didn't pursue that thread of conversation. She didn't want to have to shut down any more firmly, but she would have if it came to it. Sometimes an important part of listening was knowing when to let things go, and she was glad Kitty had that skill.]

We talked a bit. [In the land of unfinished threads, vague responses are king.] I've told him she's mine an' ta watch his back.

He's pretty close to our version. [This is going to be hard on both of them in different ways. She wants to be here for both of them.] How does your Kurt deal with it?

[Her Kurt.

Oh Gawd.

Rogue's eyes widened for a moment before she turned away, propped her elbows on her knees and covered her face with her gloved hands as she groaned.

This was going to suck so bad.]

That well? [She really wants to just hug her, but that doesn't seem like it would go over well. Maybe nothing would, but she still tries a hand on the shoulder.]

[Would it be better just to say it? It was pretty... big. Or would it be better just to sort of dance around it?]

See, the thing is, 'bout my Kurt [Rogue said into her hands without shaking off Kitty's touch] is he wasn't raised by Mystique. He was raised by two good people who loved him. Really loved him. An' so, findin' out Mystique's his mom... he was curious, but he was also... determined. To see the good in her. The best. He was... just convinced that she was -- misled. She just needed to give up her anger an' chose ta do right and everything would be okay.

[She straightened abruptly, as if hearing the words out loud for the first time shook something lose.] As if Mystique could give up her anger 'bout anything. I thought Sabertooth was mad, but he is nothin' to how angry she is.

[This... was a lot more than she usually spoke about anyone else. But it was easier, so much easier, then saying again what had happened.

She'd regret taking this way out to buy herself some time later, but for now, she wasn't even thinking of it. Saying this, actually sharing her opinion on Mystique and Kurt and the rest, felt really good.]

[~~Kurt is Luke Skywalker!~~]

[Kitty listens intently and her heart breaks a little for both of them. Kurt for wanting to see good where maybe there just is none to see and Rogue for all the lies and deception and betrayal she's been through from the very beginning and both of them for feeling so differently about it that they didn't even have each other to rely on and support one another. She lets her hand slide off when Rogue straightens up.]

You deserved better. [Kitty knows no one ever gets what they deserve. That's not how it works, but she still feels like it's worth saying. To let Rogue know that she should have had people to love her and be honest with her back then as much as she should have it now.

It's also hard to miss just how angry Rogue is while talking about Mystique's anger. Just cycling through.]

Doesn't everybody? [Her voice is tired, and Rogue rakes one gloved hand through her hair. Life wasn't about what they deserved, unfortunately, it was about what they did with the hand they were dealt.

It never made it sting any less. This had been wrong.]

...but I've done my share of slippin' off the side of the angels. It - wasn't good, after we were done, Kitty. What I did after that wasn't right. [An exhale through her nose.] An' I ain't a hundred percent sure I regret it, all the same.

At least everyone I know.

[Doing something you know is wrong and not fully regretting it? Kitty can understand that. It's also the kind of thing that makes it hard to trust yourself sometimes. At least it has been in her experience.] What did you do?

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