video/optional action

[dontthinkaboutelephants]

Who: Arthur
Broadcast: Video, fleetwide
Action: Optional; Red fish
When: Now is good

Hey! [Arthur waves at the camera, he's wearing some of his new clothes that are more utilitarian than his usual style (Yes, he keeps blowing his money on clothes. Hush.)] So I have all the preliminary sketches done. If you asked me to draw you something, you should come on over to the Red Fish to see them and tell me if I need to change anything.

I'm also working on a research project with Ms. Carter. If you could answer with some of these preliminary questions I threw together, I'd be most appreciative. Keep in mind that you don't have to answer all of them, especially if they make you uncomfortable, and that these results may be available to anyone on the ship.

attachement: surveypt1.docx

We may have some more questions in the future.

[He picks up and fiddles with a pencil, needing to do something with his hands.]

Has anyone here... lost someone close to them? How do you deal with that, especially if you maybe could have stopped them dying, if you had known something was wrong?

Comments

[ private / video ]

[beardstrokes]

[ Does he want to answer this? Those are questions that had plagued Obi-Wan for many years before he let them subside. They still come to him in his darker moments when he doesn't have an answer.

And the Force never has one for him. ]

I have.

[ private / video ]

[dontthinkaboutelephants]

[He hesitates, fiddling with the pencil some more.]

You've lost someone?

[He hesitates again.] How would someone get over something like that?

Re: [ private / video ]

[beardstrokes]

There is very rarely a how when it comes to dealing with grief. There is no neat and tidy solution to loss. Either you move on from it or you let it destroy you.

[ And grief, though not lauded as a Sith problem, is still dangerous. Still deadly. Jedi are luminous beings. Loss should not bleed them dry. ]

[dontthinkaboutelephants]

I was afraid of that, [he answers with a grim smile.] I almost watched it destroy a man. But I think he might be okay now. He has his children at least.

[He hums once, deep in his throat.] I don't think I'm going to be able to move on.

[beardstrokes]

Everyone I have ever loved has died.

[ And died so close, with Obi-Wan's arms around them as if he could shelter them from this one inescapable truth. ]

But you do not simply stop loving and living.

[dontthinkaboutelephants]

[Oh... Obi-Wan, man... He blinks in surprise.] I'm so sorry.

[He thinks about this with a frown.] Easier said than done.

[Because that's how he's been living. Not letting anyone else in. He doesn't even understand how Obi-Wan is even functioning right now.]

[beardstrokes]

[ Obi-Wan's life is the Force's favourite drama. ]

Aren't you doing it now?

[dontthinkaboutelephants]

I am, I suppose, but it feels like a reckless thing to do with my heart.

[beardstrokes]

Is it reckless? Or are you simply playing it a little too safe?

[dontthinkaboutelephants]

[His lips twitch, wanting to turn up into a smile.] That could be possible.

[Pause.] What keeps you going, if you don't mind me asking?

[beardstrokes]

[ That part is easier to answer, though Obi-Wan doesn't have a complete one. ]

The Force does, to some extent. Being part of a bigger picture keeps me going.

[ If he was more aware of it, Obi-Wan would just say he doesn't know how to stop. Even when the Force had been suppressed on Zigoola, or when he was being tortured, he simply cannot give up. ]

[dontthinkaboutelephants]

What is the Force? Hm... part of a bigger picture?

[Does the inception job count?? Working, being part of a team, does seem to help.]

[beardstrokes]

The Force is a mystical energy field. It surrounds us, influences us and propels us forward.

[ He pauses briefly. ]

Being part of the Jedi means I'm dedicated to helping the galaxy.

[dontthinkaboutelephants]

Huh. [He's not sure what else to say to that explanation.]

The Jedi are a group?

[beardstrokes]

An Order of people who are trained in the ways of the Force.