driftfleet | Eighth Transmutation [Video]

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Eighth Transmutation [Video]

Who: Alphonse Elric and YOU
Broadcast: Fleetwide
Action: N/A
When: Right now!

[As the video feed turns on, Al is digging wrapped candy bars out of a crate addressed to the crew of the SS Vanquish, looking very confused.]

Uhm... can someone tell me what a "cheese puff" is? And why there's a candy bar flavored like them?

[MASS SPONSOR DROP TIME! Your character may have received from the sponsors some Kit Kats- excuse me, Floot Brand Wafer Bars - in wacky flavors. Want some inspiration? Take a look here or Google "Japanese Kit Kats" for more. Feel free to threadjack in this post too, idc.]

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[God, what is with them getting the useless drops]

I'd, uh, probably not eat that if I were you.

I can't imagine sweet cheese would taste very good, no...

Cheese puffs are like... puffed up tastelessness covered in cheese powder to cover up the tastelessness. So, no, it wouldn't taste very good.

[WHY CAN'T THEY GET VISORS AGAIN oh wait they still have like a box full of them]

Cheese powder? If that's anything like the cheese gel Atroma gives us... that doesn't sound good at all. But enough people must like it if they make a candy bar that tastes like it.

I dunno, you know how Atroma is with their drop offs. What other flavors do they have?

True. I'm remembering the time they gave me food samples back when I couldn't even eat.

[He shuffled through the crate.]

Uhm, let's see... melon and cheese? Strawberries and cream... blueberry cheesecake... red bean paste...

... Huh. Some of those actually don't sound too bad.

[Too bad he only likes candy in small doses]

I'll be there in a minute or two, all right? [He wants to see these for himself and all]

Okay! I'm in the cargo bay.

[And indeed, Al was seated on an empty box, munching on the blueberry cheesecake-flavored bar.]

[And so, Clay comes ambling in, squinting a bit at the crate they received. Seriously, always the useless stuff. He gives Al a wave and a grin, then tilts his head in a gesture to the candy - ]

Is that the cheese one? [It's blue.]

Nah, this is blueberry. It's actually pretty good- and Pinkie Pie offered to take the cheese-flavored one off my hands.

Good. We really don't need any more cheese flavored things here.

[Cheese itself? Great! Cheese flavor? Especially cheese puff? Nooo no no. Clay gives Alphonse a ruffle of his hair once he's close enough, then leans over to look inside the crate.]

Floot Brand Wafer Bars? They could've been more creative with their naming. [Like, oh, I don't know, Kit Kats.]

[Al smiled at the hair ruffle- it was definitely something Ed would do. Or Sig, if he didn't give a bone-crushing hug first.]

I'll take real cheese any day. [He then squinted at the name.] Floot Brand, huh? That seems to be a common sponsor brand. I guess they're Atroma manufacture.

They've just gotta slap their name on everything, huh?

[He moves a few boxes aside, then frowns at some of the names he finds underneath them.]

Soy sauce flavored? Sports drink?

Gotta make sure the audience knows where to buy their contestant-endorsed products, after all.

[Al squinted.]

Hey, maybe the soy sauce one will taste good with this chicken flavor.

[Clay squints in return, looking more grossed out than anything.]

Ew, no. There are some things that should not be made into a candy flavor.

[These flavors can rot. He pushes those aside, and... ooh, hmm.]

Mitarashi dango flavored?

I've never heard of that before.

Oh my gosh there's a candy bar that tastes like cheese puffs?!

[Yeeeees!]

[Al laughed, after the initial shock of "whoa there's a bubblegum pink pony talking to me".]

You can have it if you want!

Really?! You're sure?!

[Ooh, Cheese Sandwich for sure's gonna love these!]

Hey, it's better than letting it go to waste.

Yeeees thank you thank you thank whatever-your-name-is~

I'm Alphonse. And you're...?

I'm Pinkie Pie! Eeeee lucky~! How often do you guys get those sponsor drop thingies, I want one!

[Meanwhile, behind the fourth wall, the mun is rubbing her hands and chuckling in a villainous manner at Pinkie's wishful thinking.]

Edited 2016-05-23 19:48 (UTC)

Nice to meet you!

I've gotten something once every couple of months since I got here. It's never anything particularly useful, though.

What are you talking about, there's ALWAYS a use for candy!

[Al laughed.]

Candy is always good, yes- but I got a bunch of refrigerator magnets once, too. All with sponsor logos on them.

Ooooooh I LOVE fridge magnets too! Especially the one with the letters and words and the smiley faces and hearts!

You're welcome to some of those, too, if you'd like! I don't thinkt here are any hearts or smiley faces, though...

Oh my gosh, you're so nice, Alphonse!

[Such a nice human, giving her all this stuff just because she's excited about it!]

Well, thanks for saying so. I just hope you end up liking what I give you.

Oh, I KNOW I will! Thank you~!

Your enthusiasm is very catchy.

Huh. Don't have cheesepuffs where you're from, kid?

Where I'm come from at least, it's cheese-flavored snack food. Think it's actually made out of corn.

[He shrugs.]

Can't say I'd ever want to have a candy bar flavored like it.

No- I'd never heard of some junk foods before I came here, in fact. We just had fruit and veggies and stuff for snacks.

[He nodded.]

Cheese is supposed to be savory. I don't think it's going to be a good candy, but hey, someone might be bored or daring enough to eat it, too.

Then you're probably healthier than a lot of us.

[He raises an eyebrow.]

Guess you haven't tried your sponsor drop then? Going to leave it up to some over-eager volunteer?

I do work out a lot, too.

[Al shuffles through the crate.]

Well, a few of them do have pretty normal-looking flavors. Chocolate and blueberry pie and... fruit rocks? [aka Floot Brand fruity pebbles.]

[He makes a face at the last one—a deep, quizzical frown.]</small? ...Fruit rocks. Not sure I'd want to bother with that one either.

I'd hope they wouldn't literally put fruit-flavored rocks inside a candy bar, but then again, they DID put cheese into one.

Wouldn't put it past this place. [He rolls his eyes.] It's part of the charm.

Yeah, exactly... they never give you anything useful, just mundane things that are a little off. I wonder if the audience finds this funny or charming?

Depends on just who or what is watching us. Would you?

[Might not even be human for all he knows.

He shrugs.]

As long as our pay goes up, it's all the same to me. Not that I'm fond of the idea of having my life recorded.

See, I wouldn't- but I've never really understood the appeal of or point of this whole "show" in the first place. We haven't developed television yet where I come from, so the idea that someone finds everything I do to be that entertaining doesn't make much sense to me.

[Al nodded.]

I don't like being watched, but at least they do give us something in return.

I've yet to see the point in them, and I'm more used to the idea of them than you probably are. But drama sells. It's a continuous real-life play, more or less. People get invested in the lives of people they'll never know.

[His brows crease.]

Though I can't say we kidnap our reality show participants.

Yeah... one of the sponsors sent me a package saying my backstory made me have a lot of audience appeal, so I guess they do get invested. I personally don't see what the big deal it, but maybe from an outsider's perspective, it's differen.t

That's one of the things I don't get. I'm sure they'd find dozens of willing participants if they can take people across time and space, so why abduct us?

[So a tragic backstory, maybe? Kids always do tug on people's heartstrings. Still, he's not about to pry.

He shrugs.]

Your guess is as good as mine. Entertainment value? I wonder if even the main viewership are even aware that we're not exactly here 'cause we want to be.

I doubt they know- otherwise I doubt the show would be nearly as popular. And if they edit everything before the audience sees it, it'd be really simple for them to just not show anything that paints them in a bad light.

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Eighth Transmutation [Video]

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