(no subject)

[flickerflash]

Who: Katie and anyone!
Broadcast: Yes
Action: Vanquish
When: Today!

[So ever since a couple of weeks ago when she spent a couple nights off ship (for reasons she still hasn't explained), Katie has remained basically shut up in the personnel office instead of getting underfoot or sticking her nose out of the ship and making faces at the moon, a quieter shadow of herself. She's hiding. She also feels guilty for hiding, because she wasn't raised to hide, but she's at a complete loss of what to do about what, to her, is a critical and terrifying problem. What she'd really like to do is just tell an adult about what she saw, because that would be the simplest and wisest thing for any other child. There's something terrible. Make it go away. But with how much honesty would have to be involved she'd be a wreck on the floor within minutes.

There's a brief few days in there where her mind shies around the idea that she may have to kill someone on the Fleet. Which makes her shut down on multiple levels, because she's just a kid and kids shouldn't have to think about that, and it's a horrible act, and nobody would understand at all why she did it, and on a very base level she doesn't want to, she's not made that way. But not going through with it just means she's letting the problem roam free and he's hurting people just by existing. Any older fae would have dealt with this by now. Ignoring the problem is equally a terrible option.

So there's a third choice. She's just terrified of making that one, too. It's never ended well for anyone. Sam and her mother are testament to that.

In short, Katie is hiding because she can't make a choice and getting more and more frazzled and withdrawn because in not taking action she's letting things get worse and this suuucks--

Sometimes it might be nice just to be, in fact, a little girl.]

---------

[By the second week she starts making dolls. Simplistic blue yarn dolls at the base. It's just something to do with her hands and mind at first. Then she makes one in which her blue wool is dipped sporadically into black ink as she makes it, so the doll looks rather like it got thrown in a tar puddle when she's done. She attaches five or six pieces of loose, spattered wool to its shoulders, closes her eyes, and blows gently on its darkened face.

Don't ask why she does creepy things.

Then she stares at her little collection, swallows... and goes to watch Princess Bride instead.  It's video courage!  (Which small children have to make do with instead of liquid courage.)  Which leads to this post on the network twenty minutes in, very grumpily:]

[Video]

If we're in space and everything's so very future and all, why don't we even have television? [Petulant, pale child alert. Please ignore the spattered bits of ink on her chin.] Aren't we allowed to watch alien TV?

...I don't suppose anyone can make a TV with magic, can they? I don't think you should have to watch movies on this thing. [She taps the screen and accidentally turns it off. OH WELL. Question stands.

...but now that it's off, after a few minutes there comes an addition in text:]

[Text]

If it would make everything better, would you do something terrible so that nobody else had to?

[Hopefully, that part's anonymous. Right?]

Comments

[kickingand]

because most people dont.

and sure but sometimes solving a problem isnt as easy as it might look at the start. sometimes someone who sees a problem shouldnt be the one who has to fix it

[flickerflash]

most people are sensible

[...nng. This is the problem with being cursed never to tell the truth. Her post is growing more frustrating than helpful. After a few moments:]

what if you can't tell anyone what's wrong so you have no choice

[On the other hand phrasing things as questions is a nice loophole.]

[kickingand]

[ kiddo, only asking questions here is not going to help the situation either. ]

depends on why you cant tell

[flickerflash]

[True, that. How far can she push it...]

cursed by a witch. she didn't like how honest i was about how ugly she was

[kickingand]

leave it to a witch. [ GOD HE HATES WITCHES. they're so gross. ]

so you cant even ask someone to help?

[flickerflash]

[Oh hey, he just rolled with that. Interesting.]

I'm sure I could ask
but how would I say what I need help with?
I don't want to get anyone else in trouble either.

[kickingand]

yeah well some people are always in trouble

[flickerflash]

so should I find someone to help whos already in trouble then?

[kickingand]

you should find somebody to help who wont mind the trouble

[flickerflash]

[...]

what if it involved killing the trouble?

[kickingand]

you the only person who knows what they did?

[flickerflash]

yes

[It's technically a lie. It's not a case of doing anything. It's a case of killing by merely existing.]

[kickingand]

and you cant tell anyone why they deserve it

[flickerflash]

not even them
though I suppose he knows already

[kickingand]

so hes biding his time

[flickerflash]

yes

[Well. He's doing harm just by existing. Biding his time is technically all he has to do.]

[kickingand]

still might wanna think about getting someone to do the deed for you

[flickerflash]

did you have any suggestions?

[kickingand]

you got anyone in mind? anyone at all?

[flickerflash]

[Yeah. Someone offered to help. Problem is communicating that. This'd be so much easier if she had Sam to translate.]

I think so
they haven't offered to help but I bet they would if I asked
if I can make them understand me anyway it's hard

[kickingand]

because of the witch.

you want it enough, youll figure it out

[flickerflash]

witches are annoying
do you know much about them?

[She's just curious, now.]

[kickingand]

i know enough

[flickerflash]

are you secretly a witch

[SHE DOUBTS IT.]

[kickingand]

[ HOW RUDE ]

if i told you it wouldnt be a secret would it

but no