03 - video

[winn]

Who: Winn Schott, Cisco Ramon, and you!
Broadcast: yes!
Action: Iskaulit
When: now!

[ Today, Winn's broadcast comes live -- from in front of a door. it's a plain door, one of the Iskaulit's, as it happens - and on it is a plaque reading 'Discovery 1'. He clears his throat and offers the camera a little wave ]

Greetings, fellow Fleeters! Did -- we decide on Fleeters? [ He mimes at someone off screen, frowning at whatever reply he gets ]

Drifters, we said - Drifters. Drifting in Spacer. Oh! Wait for it - wait for it - Realitynauts. You know because we’re reality show starts and astro - never mind.

[ Cisco Ramon’s face, no longer a girl, is shoved inside the frame. He is clearly talking while eating some version of space sandwich ]

Is this thing recording? Hi guys.

[ Winn scrunches his nose at the terms ] Dude, ‘Drifters’ makes us sound like a New Age boyband. [ He shakes his head and looks back at the camera - oh yeah, it’s rolling. ] You’d think I’d learn to rehearse first by now -- hi, whatever we call ourselves! If you’re new, that’s Cisco, I’m Winn, and we are proud to finally open the Iskaulit’s brand new lecture hall for business!

[ Hold on hold on he prepared for this - he pulls a party popper out of his pocket, and pops it at the camera!! Colorful confetti everywhere! ]

Dude my hair - anyway, we will be adding a document of the lectures to come and we want to remind a few unruly members of the Realitynauts - I’m looking at you Hank - to give us the titles for your lectures. Pronto. ASAP or I’ll be forced to tell awkward stories about you to the whole network even if they’re not true!

You really have a fixation on ~nauts, you know that? [ It never sounds good. Ever. Especially now, when he’s bringing it up. Why did he bring it up? He’s regretting all his life choices. ]

Anyway yeah, hurry up and tell us what you’re talking about, and if you weren’t around for it last time and wanna sign up you’re always welcome to, just hit up either Cisco or myself, and we’ll work it out! Lectures are gonna be Every Thursday at 8 PM, because of a very scientific selection process - but if our kindly lecturers are up for it - we were hoping people working on series will continue them on a day and time of their choosing so people don’t have to wait too long between installments. Admittance is first come first serve, but don’t worry - everything is gonna be filmed and uploaded for you!

Oh my God, do you get the paradox of us filming ourselves while we’re already being filmed by tacky aliens? It’ll break your brain if you try to figure it out. Anyway, to more important business.

[ Have a line face, network ]

It has come to my attention that different people here on the fleet are trying to convince others in various, unholy ways that their world makes the best pizza. Which is a crime since everyone knows Central City has the best pizza of the entire multiverse.

No one knows that because it’s a dirty heinous lie - National City pride!! [ Winn pumps a fist in the air; completely invested in this fight. If you’ve never met him, you might think he really is treating it like a life-or-death issue. ]

As you can see, this disagreement risks friendships and lives and so we have decided to solve this once and for all. Since we can’t actually have any world’s version of pizza here because space sucks, we are going to do battle, the winner will win everlasting honor for his city as the city where the best pizza of the multiverse can be found. And since we’re nerds we have decided the battle shall be based on -

[ wait for it ]

Song. Yes, you heard it! We are going head to head in the ultimate karaokebowl! Winn. Show them the machine.

[ Winn pulls what appears to be a small screen on a tripod into the camera’s view. Holding it in one hand, he gestures towards the various parts of it as he speaks in a Shopping Network voice. ] This is a state-of-the-art Winsco original Sound Weaver 9001 [ Because of course it had to be OVER 9000!!!! ] with a sound quality you have to hear to believe! Easy to connect to with all your network communicators or bluetooth devices!

The perfect war machine of our ultimate-once-in-a-lifetime-karaokebowl in the name of Pizza, the Flash and heroics. And just to give you a little example of what’s going to happen, me and Winn the Traitor here are going to do the first round using a song we found on the comms which is only the most please-get-out-of-my-head song. So, karaokebowl first round, Cisco Ramon representing Team Flash and Central City against -

[ Winn unzips his hoodie to reveal his custom made t-shirt underneath ] Winn Schott, representing Team Supergirl and National City!

[ Hitting the play button, the music starts playing ]

[ enjoy, Space, as you view the surprisingly-good-voice-wise-but-otherwise-absurd karaoke version of Let it Go by these two morons, complete with Cisco untying his hair dramatically in the middle. When it ends and just before the feed ends too, he will lean close to the camera ]

Pause for applause - other pretenders to the throne of the best pizza of the mutltiverse, you have been challenged!

[ Winn points to his eyes - and then points to the camera before ending the feed. As promised, the broadcast has a text attachment at the bottom with the lecture schedule:

2016: A Space-Time Odyssey Lecture Schedule

1. Loki - The Golden Skein - the science of magic
2. Tyrion Lannister - Follow up lecture on Westeros (1 of 2)
3. Beverly Crusher - Adjusting to Life in Space (1st in a series of medicine related lectures)
4. Maglor - a Concert
5. Winn Schott - Byte me: the Digital Age Unveiled
6. Jim Kirk - Self Defense (1st in a series)
7. Cisco Ramon - The Amazing, Awesome, Absolutely Terrifying Physics of the Multiverse
8. Hermione Granger - Home World/ Life in Another Pocket Dimension/ Magic
9. Kara Danvers - A Brief History of Earth Feminism
10. Hank McCoy - genetics
11. Kitty Pryde - Genocide (Spoiler alert: It's bad)
12. Charles Xavier - TBD - offering history, biology, chemistry, genetics, English literature - cast your vote maybe he’ll make a decision!
* Online Only Lecture - nightingale - what you need to know about the fleet - Unbound to schedule ]

Comments

[brainiest]

Honestly, 'Life in another Pocket Dimension' sounds far more exciting than anything I would be able to come up with.

[ And she can't think of a title that might be particularly complimentary to the Drabwurld, considering. ]

I'll just split it into two parts and do the Drabwurld and then some magic. It'll be fun!

[winn]

I tried. [ putting a hand to his heart and nodding appreciatively, thank you for appreciating his titling sense. he's worked so hard on his own title, it's a little heartbreaking it's been so gloriously overshadowed by his and cisco's impressions of a disney queen. ]

That sounds amazing, I'm looking forward to it!

[brainiest]

[ She fights back a laugh, shaking her head and grinning. ]

I appreciate it. I'm glad someone here has a creative bone.

[ Still, she looks a little sheepish, almost nervous. ]

I've never given a lecture before.

[winn]

That's ok, neither have I. Charles did say people who are nervous about it are welcome to come to him for advice - if there're enough of us, he might be willing to workshop it. And we have the space for it now -

[brainiest]

- and Charles is probably the best person to ask, considering. [ He was a Professor, once, of course, and she knows that he's also good and patient and - well, she could spend a long time complimenting Charles Xavier. ] I might send him a message, just to see. I've taught people before, but teaching people to conjure a patronus and actually standing teaching for a long time are a bit different.

[winn]

If you guys are workshopping, let me know, I should get in on that.

[ but one-on-one time with charles is a little uncomfortable for him, considering how his brain can't seem to stop yelling his worst fears around him. ]

[brainiest]

I'll make sure you're top of the list, Winn, don't worry.

[ It's easier for Hermione; she knew him in another world and it makes understanding him easier. She opens her mind to him without hesitation and lets him step inside because her trust has already been earned, time and time again. ]

Maybe I should do a mini lecture on 'how to handle knowing people from other worlds that don't remember you in this one'.

[winn]

Thanks, Hermione.

[ he smiles gratefully. losing his mind is his biggest fear, has been for most of his life. letting someone else in there is a horrifying concept for him. if there's someone else around, if they're talking about how to pass a lecture...maybe he could be calm and only psychically yell excitement. ]

Yeah - I bet that'd be good for a lot of people.

[brainiest]

Of course.

[ It's not something she can really understand - Charles was close to her, ridiculously so, and this new Charles is him but different, even if she's still learning - but she can wrap her mind around other people's apprehension. ]

It'd be good for me, too, honestly.

[winn]

Cathartic, in a way?

[ this is his first cross dimensional experience and so far, all the people he cares about stayed put, but he sees how it affects other people. just the thought of a kara who doesn't know him is enough to break his heart. why is he thinking about it? he's decided to make this a happy day! no more sad thoughts! ]

You wanna open with that?

[ if it'll help her, he's more than willing to accommodate ] I can trade slots with you if you want, or you can grab the lecture hall off-schedule - we don't really have plans for it the rest of the time.

[brainiest]

Just a little bit. It's nice that some people understand, but - it can explode in my face sometimes.

[ Literally. She's still trying to get over the breakdown she had with Robb, knowing too much about him and not being able to express it. Now, she just has to... Survive it, somehow, and that's the difficult part. ]

No, it's fine, I'll have to figure it out at some point. I'm not even sure what I'd say, yet, and I'll probably have to talk to other people about it, make sure I can actually. Handle it.

[winn]

Hey -- I know I said it last time, but - if you ever need to talk, my offer always stands. And -- if you wanna have some fun, we got that karaoke machine -

[ because if she doesn't want to talk - which he understands, pretty much everyone is trying to get him to talk and he struggles greatly with it - she should at least have some cheer. ]

[brainiest]

I really, really can't sing.

[ She does manage to laugh, though, and she bites her lip. ]

Maybe I'll come and watch you two, though.

[winn]

That's not a requirement for karaoke.

[ he nods, but smiles ]

You're always welcome as audience though! Especially if you vote for me.

[brainiest]

I'll end up sounding like a mandrake.

[ Not that Winn probably knows what that is, but - ]

I feel like Cisco has my vote by virtue of how much he flatters me...

[winn]

Hey, what about virtue of effort! I made this t-shirt! And talent! And I can flatter you too, it'd be really easy cuz there's plenty to flatter - but you know, I respect you too much to try and buy your vote so cheaply, and to cheapen the very honest compliments by tying them into a bribe.

[brainiest]

[ Plenty to flatter - Hermione flushes, and it colours over the silver of her scar, leaving her to shift awkwardly. ]

I feel like I'm going to be to be stuck between a rock and a hard place here.

[winn]

[ he's gonna smile as charmingly as he can manage - it mostly comes out cute. ]

Vote with your heart - and your ears. I believe in you, I know you'll do the right thing.

[ so that's a pretty accurate assessment there. ]

[brainiest]

[ That's not fair! They're both cute - even if she has a soft spot for Cisco that she might never mention to anyone, ever. ]

My heart and my ears. Let's hope they don't bleed too badly, then.

[ Haha.mp3. She's hilarious. ]

[winn]

[ seize the day, hermione! his nerd bro is the best. ]

I'll to keep Cisco off the mic.

[ nodding, he's just as hilarious. ]

[brainiest]

I should say there's nothing wrong with Cisco's voice, but I've only ever heard him speak, really. I don't think that actually counts.

[ Because while 'Let it Go' was beautiful, she's sure he could do better and astound her. ]

[winn]

...is that your way of saying what we did doesn't count as singing?

[brainiest]

I was thinking more... I needed to hear you both sing independently to get a good idea?

[winn]

[ mm-hmm. both of them, sure. ]

We got a lot of music here, and I'm willing to accommodate such a lovely and scientific minded judge.

[brainiest]

[ What are you implying!! ]

I can't be the only judge though. I'm sure others have commented on your singing here too.