fourth; text/action

[eyeforaneye]

Who: Uchiha Sasuke + You
Broadcast: Fleetwide text
Action: SS Huntress
When: Right here, right now

[ Waking up somewhere unusual isn't the strange part; that's something he's grown depressingly used to in his sorry excuse for a life. But waking up in a place that isn't Konoha, isn't his world, and is instead an uncomfortably familiar confined technological nightmare of a ship with the distinct feeling that something is off is outside his limited comfort zone.

He gets his bearings first before going for his communicator, head further dizzied by a displayed date that doesn't match up with what he remembers. ]

I have a gap in my memory. Is this a normal occurrence here?

[ And that's it, that's his whole message after being absent for who knows how long. How quintessentially Sasuke. how much did he drink ]

Comments

video, because fuck ur texts

[ino]

Oh hey, you're awake ...!

[ Look who's noticeably a couple of years older than she was when you went to sleep, Sasuke. ]

how dare you, madam 1/2

[eyeforaneye]

...

[ a pause for that to sink in ]

[eyeforaneye]

What happened?

[ WHY ]

[ino]

[ She's trying very hard not to grin. ]

You've been asleep for a long time.

[eyeforaneye]

I can see that. However... [ He's visibly looking over his own hand, specifically avoiding the left -- that's another conversation entirely and he hasn't gotten accustomed to using it much yet. ]

My body remains unchanged.

[ino]

[ Okay, okay ... she feels a little bad. ]

You had a different kind of nap than I did. There's the augment induced coma, and then there's the augment induced coma with bonus going-home-and-getting-memories-without-really-leaving.

[eyeforaneye]

[ The pause is weightier this time. ]

You returned to our world? [ He has a lot of questions but he also knows Ino is intelligent enough to be able to guess them, expecting them to be pre-empted. ]

[ino]

Uh-huh.

[ She can guess, but first, she puts her chin in her palm, staring at him in the camera with some level of amusement. ]

You know what's amazing? You have this innate ability to somehow cause trouble without even being anywhere nearby. It's actually impressive.

[eyeforaneye]

[ This is not a good way to wake up, Ino, for the love of god. ]

Should I take that to mean that you now have full knowledge of the war and its repercussions?

[ino]

Oh, yeah, the war's long over now.

[ She's curious, though: ]

You know a Kido? Tsumiki Kido?

[eyeforaneye]

"Tsumiki"... I know the name, but not the individual personally. He came up when I was researching Danzou, though I didn't have much time to go in depth in that study. [ Because he had to kill Danzou quickly. No regrets, really. ]

Is he related to this?

[ino]

Huh.

[ She was sure he would have at least known Sasuke a little, to get close enough to ... ]

Well, apparently he knew you pretty well. He was collecting your dead skin and hair.

[eyeforaneye]

[ Okay. Back up. ]

My skin and hair. [ He repeats it back more slowly as if allowing Ino to retract that insane statement. ]

That's impossible unless he acquired my clothing or looted battlefields of mine. That, or he went by a pseudonym when I encountered him.

[ino]

[ She shrugs. ]

I thought it was kind of weird, too. We didn't find out how he got a hold of it.

But, he had enough to perfectly imitate your chakra signature. He was running around as you, asking shinobi from other villages for help destroying Konoha, and then killing them if they refused to cooperate.

[eyeforaneye]

Sounds like it'd cause an inconvenient misunderstanding.

[ Do you hear this blasé reaction? This is how Kido got away with it for so long, because Sasuke clearly had other priorities. ]

I'm assuming you stopped him, then.

[ino]

Not really. Everyone knew it wasn't actually you. But then he kidnapped Sakura, trying to get your attention.

[ Is she judging you? Yes. She is definitely judging you. ]

And then you didn't even show. Sai and I had to take care of things.

[eyeforaneye]

[ Allow him a moment to read that extremely obvious tone. ]

... you're judging me. [ genius ]

For something I haven't even done.

[ino]

Unless you come from an alternate universe where you're not an oblivious dick, I'm judging you for something you will do in the future.

[eyeforaneye]

... Sakura is not the only person in the world that needs assistance. I'll make the objective judgment call when I have to; she can take care of herself.

[ Yeah, he is absolutely going to do it in the future. ]

[ino]

[ THE MOST EXASPERATED SIGH IN THE WORLD. ]

You're totally missing the point.

[eyeforaneye]

This conversation has visited several.

State your point clearly, then.

[ino]

She misses you, Sasuke. In the "sigh loudly and stare off into the distance all the time" kind of way. You've been gone since the war ended, pretty much.

My point is that I think she'd appreciate it if you stopped by sometime in the near future and said hello.

[ Among other things. ]

[eyeforaneye]

[ ... ]

So it's like that. [ Yeah. ]

I'm not unaware of her feelings, Ino, but I also have things I need to do. You're her friend so your bias is inevitable, but I trust she understands the situation.

[ino]

[ She looks very unimpressed with that answer, but there's nothing much she can do about it. After all, it's not like he'll remember this conversation when he goes home. ]

Well, other than that little incident ... the moon almost crashed into the Earth. That was annoying.

[eyeforaneye]

[ Look, I know my love life is a doomed mess; what are you expecting from me. ]

I'll assume I didn't ignore that one. [ How fucking jaded are we to weird shit happening by now? This jaded. ]

Who was responsible?