driftfleet | [video/Action]

Entry tags:

[video/Action]

Who: Kitty Pryde and everyone who tags!
Broadcast: Yep!
Action: Planet fun! Or Windrose maybe. I'm flexible.
When: Now or nowish. Definitely now-adjacent.

[Broadcast]
I have an important request. I need someone who can make cheese. Do cheese makers have an old timey name like cobblers and haberdashers or are those only for clothes? Anyway, calling all of those.

Cheese doesn't seem to be a thing here from what I can tell, but we're just one ingredient away from some really great pizza. I have no idea what cheese requires other than cows or goats or something. I grew up so close to Wisconsin, but I feel like I learned so little.

I would also accept alternative cheese. I know there were vegan kinds made out of hopes and dreams or something I assume. I can pay you or share the finished pizza or do something in trade if I had skills. I could beat someone up for you maybe. [She's not going to do that. Probably.] We'll work it out.

[Action]
[She's on the planet doing all of these things and more but this post won't get to CAPTCHA! You might find her on the Windrose veeeery rarely!]

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

So only ser Winn can touch your teats... A pity. My lady wife told me many times I am rather good with her teats. [His shoulders slump a little after he has said that.] I am truly in my cups...

[Robb rubs his eyes and turns to focus on the words she is saying.]

Of course, I do not want you to betray the one you love. I would not...I would not want to betray Jeyne either. [Robb shakes his head and frowns.]

But Jeyne cannot love a corpse, she can only mourn. [Finally he tries to stand, holding on to the bar. This was all a very bad idea.] Tell me if your love wishes to share your teats. I will gladly... [And then the world spins around him and his knees start to give in.]

You'll be the first to know. [Neither she nor Winn would ever be okay with sharing, thanks.]

[If she never hears "teats" again it will still be too soon. But we're about to solve that mystery from before. Would she catch him if he started to topple? Yes, apparently she would. She braces herself and grabs for Robb to keep him steady. She's stronger than she looks and she knows how to position herself to make the most of it, but drunk people can be difficult. Especially if he becomes dead weight. No passing out, Robb!]

Hey, hey, stay with me, Stark.

[When Kitty catches him he starts to laugh all of a sudden. He remembers something funny and starts to snicker in a most dumb way possible, completely forgotten Kitty’s tits or whatever other body part of her he wants to get his hands on.]

Once I told... [He leans on the barstool and squints at Kitty.] ...I told the lady Riona she should not turn to drinking because it...you will say things you do not want to say. Well...look at this!

Or waking up in unfamiliar beds. [Which is actually something she managed after getting very drunk once she learned she was dead. Nothing happened. Well, some kissing.] Getting sick. Falling and hurting yourself. Racking up a bill. All kinds of fun side effects.

[Sighing. How did she become his baby sitter? And yet she doesn't want to just leave him this way.] Where are you staying?

I would bloody murder for waking up in a strange bed close to a warm body of a lovely woman. [Normally Robb would not even voice such urges, but everything went so easy after drinking a significant amount of sweet red wine.] Just once. [Normally he should not even consider wanting another when Jeyne is still waiting for him.]

Here... [He points at the ground while looking at her.] I stay here...inside this building. [In a room.] I do not know where...but here...

Okay, well, don't murder for that. You'll end up with a cold body. [And she does understand the sentiment. She needs touch and affection and doesn't do so great without it especially if it stretches on.]

Come on, I'll get you to bed.

Well...I am a cold body... It is not much of a difference. Only to the maid I might bed.

[He still leans against her.] I wish you to join me...but I know you cannot. [Finally he sighs and moves a hand through his hair.]

Maybe I need to sleep over this. ...Sleep this over...

You're warm and alive here, Robb even if that's cold comfort. [Sometimes you just have to wallow for awhile. Grieve your own loss before you remember you're lucky to be alive.]

Sleep is a good plan. [She'll shift, trying to gently pull him along with her so she can find his room to deposit him in. On the plus side, he'll have an excellent view of her cleavage as she tries to rescue him from himself.]

[Robb laughs at her answer. Of course, it is said in kindness but it does not mean anything to him. It feels like being treated on a large, delicious pie while having a very painful stomach ache.]

The gods all laugh at me, my lady. I am their most funny jape.

[He allows himself to be pulled up and enjoys the pleasant view of her cleavage.] It is unfair you grant me such a view, my lady. It makes me miss all of that even more.

Yeah, well, I'm cruel and you don't actually have to stare. [But she's not going to be that bothered if he does as long as he keeps his hands and other assorted parts to himself. She just wants to get him someplace he'll be safe and where he won't hit on any less equipped women.

And maybe, just maybe some part of her does enjoy the attention and compliments even if they are crude and he's completely out of it and she doesn't like that this is a little true, so no admitting of that! She blames it on the fact he's cute and usually seems a decent fellow who Tyrion speaks well enough of.]

[Robb does keep his hands to himself. Yet his eyes are an entirely different matter. He is practically undressing her with them, imagining how she'd look without those clothes.

Would it mean he is married here as well? While Jeyne is out there and he would never see her anymore?]

I am doomed... [He murmurs softly.] ...doomed with nights of me alone with my right hand and my imagination. [Then he laughs too loud.]

Woe is me. [A sigh before he leans a bit more against her.] Let us find my chambers.

[The gaze is practically melting her clothes right off!] You're going to find love again. Probably when you least expect or want it. Love's tricky that way.

[She moves him along hopefully in the right direction.]

[Robb has no idea where his room is. All he remembers were blue blankets but they all had blue blankets, not?]

I do not think so. [He shakes his head and sighs...] I do not think...it would not be right to betray Jeyne...even if I will never see her again. Even when you look lovely.

If I were not wed I could love you. [He smiles a stupid drunken smile.]

[She'll just deposit him in the first unoccupied room unless he says it's definitely not his.]

Oh, Robb... [The L-word, really? Admiring her body and hitting on her is one thing. Don't bring hearts into this especially when it feels insincere under the circumstances.]

I don't know what kind of oath you take, but where I'm from it's til death do you part and I figure this is close enough to death.

[Robb would probably be unable to tell his room from another room at this point.]

Isn’t death going to part us? I told you. Death is going to part us. [He wants to murmur some more before he can feel his stomach protest against everything he has been drinking today.

At the least he realizes that he should move away. Quickly he turns, using one arm to push her away a little, and after that he hunches down to vomit on the floor.

Like a king.]

[Ew. Okay, she's not holding your hair back. She's been through enough tonight.]

No, that's way better than waiting for a bathroom, sure. I'll let them know there's clean up on aisle one while you...finish. [Then she'll just ask the shopkeeper which room is his. Simplify this situation down. And hopefully after he gets some sleep—okay, a lot of sleep and fluids—he'll feel better...about being dead and missing his wife and letting his kingdom down. Cheerful things.]

[Robb wipes his mouth when he is done and stand still to look at what is there. Quite some, actually. Still, he has no idea what those chunks are. Had he been eating something?]

I think I am done... [He nods.] ...Let us go. I crave a bed where I can dream of your teats.

[OOC: end it here?]

["Dream of your teats." If she had a nickel for every time a king told her that... Time to get him off to bed.]

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Yep!