driftfleet | (no subject)

Entry tags:

(no subject)

Who: Renart
Broadcast: Text fleetwide
Action: Planetside
When: Post-shuffle

[Text]

[Renart does not want to be here. Sure, being out in space has to be a step up from that post-apocalyptic wasteland. Space is one of the few places she's never actually been to before, and since she's always wanted to she should be thrilled.

But there are important people back in that stupid wasteland. Ones that are liable to get into dangerous, possibly deadly situations without her there to keep them safe. She's hoping they've been pulled here too. Finding out is her main priority as she fiddles with her communicator, eventually figuring out how to send a quick message to the network at large.]

Since I happen to be completely mundane
Absolutely unremarkable
And entirely forgettable
Why don't you tell me about yourselves?

Where are you from? What is your home like?

I'll let you know when you can stop talking ฅ(^･ω･^ฅ)

[At the very least, maybe she can hunt down a few of them. Or people who know them.]

Oh, and does there happen to be a curated list of every individual who has been pulled here?

[Action]

[After she's demolished those pudding deserts and figured out how to get down to the actual planet she'll be doing just that in hopes of finding someone familiar. Thankfully no one seems to care too much about her ears and tail which means she doesn't bother hiding them - though, having to contend with such an affectionate civilization quickly wears thin and after several hours of searching she takes a break, making her way to the edge of the forests. For an animal Fairy Tale such as herself it's more relaxing, even if she doubts she's likely to find anyone important away from the hustle and bustle of the markets. Sadly, the friends she has in mind don't entirely share her preference for nature. They're all human, or were human, or are human-y. Not animals, basically.

Still, it doesn't mean she can't enjoy herself for a little while before she resumes searching. She'll keep her messenger bag (and her Story) close as she wanders through the trees, ears twitching in response to every subtle noise in the vicinity.]

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

I think that is fair, if you start

Sure thing! What kind of story do you want?

How about one that involves the protagonist being exceptionally clever?

Ooh, OOH! I could tell you about the first Hearth's Warming!

Alright, go for it

Okay so a looooong time ago in Equestria, there were three pony tribes, and they ONLY cared about their own tribe! In fact, they even... HATED each other!

[Oooooh so spoopy!]

[Extremely spooky!

... Renart does not see why that's a big deal, hate is normal. But she'll play along.]

Oh my!

[Sheee'll see why as the story goes on.]

Yeah, it was REALLY bad back then. The pegasi controlled the weather, but demanded food grown by the earth ponies in return. And the unicorns asked for food too, but THEY were in charge of raising the sun and the moon.

One day, though, a straaange blizzard started to snow all over the land. No matter how hard they tried, the earth ponies couldn't grow anything, and the pegasi couldn't clear it away, so everypony was freezing and hungry!

[If all that is true then her world must be pretty interesting.... She's met the unicorn in her own world once or twice, but it was always very flighty. A whole world of them and other magic equine is an fun thought.

So yes, her interest in the story is growing.]

I'm guessing they needed someone or several someones who were exceedingly clever to find a solution

They sure did! Unfortunately, when the leaders of the three tribes met to solve it, all they did was argue! Commander Hurricane of the Pegasi demanded why Chancellor Puddinghead was hogging all the food. SHE said she shouldn't feed pegasi who were making it snow all the time when she had freezing earth ponies to feed. Hurricane said SHE was innocent, it HAD to be the unicorns casting some weird spell! Princess Platinum was offended at her magic being called weird, AND being accused of wanting to freeze her subjects!

So all three of the leaders went back home, madder than ever and traveling through even harder snowfall.

Even though they disagreed at the meeting, once they got home and consulted their advisors Private Pansy, Smart Cookie, and Clover the Clever, they all agreed on one thing: finding a new home was the best solution. The journeys they went on were long and hard (especially for the advisors), but eventually they each found someplace perfect for their tribe. Commander Hurricane and Private Pansy saw clear blue skies with big, fluffy clouds for them to rest on, and called their new home Pegasopolis. Princess Platinum and Clover the Clever found gorgeous mountain with tons of gems, and called their new home Unicornia. Chancellor Puddinghead and Smart Cookie came across a place with fresh air, huge trees, and fertile soil, and called their new home Dirtville (but then decided Earth would be better).

It was mission accomplished: until they all spotted each other again.

[Those are some exceptionally silly names.

She likes them, especially Clover the Clever, for obvious reasons.]

I think Dirtville has a charming ring to it
Earth was probably better, though

Anyways, what happened next?
More fighting?

Oh, yeah. ALL the leaders were calling for war while Smart Cookie, Private Pansy, and Clover the Clever tried to calm them down. Just as the bickering reached a peak, though... snow started falling again.

Oh my
I would have loved to see their expressions when they saw the snow

Oh, yeah, everypony was REALLY surprised! And they were even more surprised when they found the only shelter around was a single cave that they all had to share.

Arguing got even WORSE in the caves. The leaders asked their advisors to draw and erase boundary lines, they fought over rocks, it was SO bad that they almost didn't notice the wind starting to reach into the cave!

I'm sure it would have been disastrous if it had gone completely unnoticed
Who caught it first?

Clover, of course! The leaders were too busy arguing, but the others felt the winds blow, and Clover saw the ice cake the walls, and the entrance to the cave freezing over. Eventually the ice made it down to the floor, and encasing the leaders, still spewing hatred until the slick, clear ice swallowed the three of them whole!

That's what you get for not being clever◝(´◝ω◜｀)◜

[Now now, be nice. Story's not over yet.]

Clover, Pansy, and Smart Cookie ended up huddled together in the middle of the cave out of fear, trying to avoid the ice. When they looked up, that's when they saw... the WINDIGOS! Clover told the others they were REALLY strong winter spirits that feed off of hatred and fighting! That's when they realized they'd brought this on themselves, and that they were all going to be frozen together...

But that's ALSO when they realized they DIDN'T hate each other.

[... Windigos. That's funny. Also not the wendigos that she's used to, but still interesting.

She's going to hold off on any responses, so that Pinkie can wrap the story up without any more of her interruptions.]

[Let's see if the mun can pull this off without her fingers dying!]

But it's ALSO when they realized that... they didn't really hate each other at all. They were more annoyed with their own leaders, and then they just really really really really really disliked them, not hated them. That got a little giggle out of them... and the windigos eyes flared with anger.

They huddled closer together as the ice began to cover them up too, declaring that if they were going to go, they didn't mind doing it together at all. And just when they were almost completely covered... a bright fire lit up from Clover's horn, driving the windigos away and freeing them from the icy prison. It was the Fire of Friendship, totally new magic too, formed from them putting aside their hate for understanding each other!

So the three ponies kept the Fire going through the night by telling stories and songs. And as their friendship grew, the warmer it got. Soon the ice covering the cave melted, the leaders were freed, and even the snow outside melted away! So the three tribes decided to come together and share the new land! They raised their new flag and called it Equestria!

And that's how my country was founded, and how the first Hearth's Warming happened!

[Being an avid reader, Renart is more than happy to read through the rest of the story quickly. A little sappy with that whole fire of friendship thing, but it really does remind her of a fairy tale. She likes that.]

That was a wonderful story
And a very good way to found a country
Humans could learn a thing or two from you ponies

[Maybe be more clever instead of brutishly violent.]

Do you still celebrate Hearth's Warming today?

Aw, thanks! And yup, we celebrate it every winter!

[Although her family's celebrations are very... rock themed. Comes from living on a rock farm.]

How?

[She knows of several human holidays, but pony ones? Nope.]

Oh, we all spend time with our friends and families, and a lot of the stories and songs Pansy and Cookie and Clover told each other are carols now! And a lot of places hold a pageant every year to retell the story! My friends and I got to perform in the one in Canterlot one year! I was Chancellor Puddinghead!

Every family celebrates it a little differently though! My family and I have LOTS of rock soup for dinner when we first get together, and then we carve dolls to put over the fireplace every year! And then we have a HUGE scavenger hunt to figure out who gets to raise the flag that year, and we hide presents for each other to find too!

That sounds a bit like Christmas
A winter holiday centered around family and friends, with pageants and carols

Rock soup and scavenger hunts aren't generally part of it, though