catching up with friends

[outstandingbalance]

Who: Natasha + Wanda, Natasha + You
Broadcast: Nope
Action: SS Starstruck, SS Vanquish, Iskaulit
When: Now-ish?

Starstruck

[With Pietro showing up, it seemed like the thing to do to check in on Wanda. Natasha had kept an eye open for the girl, but unsurprisingly their paths hadn't crossed by accident since then. She could have sent a private message—maybe should have—but the kind of distance that talking to someone through a screen would hide clues to Wanda's emotional state that Natasha would rather not miss.

It made the most sense to drop in. Have surprise on her side. See Wanda face to face.

That's how Natasha found herself on the SS Starstruck, standing outside her younger teammate's door like she belonged there and knocking confidently. Will Wanda even be in? On the other hand, would Natasha be here if she weren't?]


Starstruck - later

[It's a less confident Natasha who slips off of the ship after her meeting with Wanda, a Natasha with new memories and nursing a stabbing headache. She'd just as soon sneak off the ship without running into anyone else at this point; she could use a little time to herself to recover and regroup.

Even a spy might have a hard escaping a spaceship unnoticed, though.]


Vanquish

[Back on her own ship, Natasha retreats to her bunk almost immediately. She lays down for a bit—but she doesn't stay down long. After enough time to push aside the worst of her nagging headache, she throws herself into activity. Nothing useful. Nothing that takes focus. But empty action, something to work off a little energy while her thoughts are elsewhere. Pushups. Sit ups. Lunges. Whatever she can do with the space she has.

Eventually, the workout might spill out into the corridor...]


Iskaulit

[But after that, her workout will take her to a real gym, somewhere she can actually open up. Anyone who finds her here might run into Natasha taping up her hands before laying into a heavy bag. Or they might run into her working her frustration off on the bag itself. Spectators might be impressed—if they don't know her, and if they don't know people with superpowers. She's stronger than most people take her for, though, and her form is more or less flawless, if you notice those things.

She stays in the gym for a long while, until she feels herself back on top of her emotions. All of her reactions have been identified, categorized and compartmentalized.

That's when she she finally wanders over to one of the bars.

She's earned a drink.]

Comments

starstruck;

[uprightness]

[ it's an almost ordinary day aboard the starstruck, steve spends his time at the weaponry, checking that everything is functioning and numbered, that nothing is missing. he is filling up spare time, really, between this and some sketching and anything else he can think about. idleness breeds eternal misery, doesn't it?

he's heading out of the weaponry and towards the kitchen when he catches sight of her. ]

-- hey. been visiting?

[outstandingbalance]

[Natasha's smile when she sees him doesn't quite reach her eyes. Could be because of new memories, but more likely it's because he head feels like it was split open.

Either way, she makes the attempt. That has to be worth something, right?]

Something like that. Checking how Wanda was doing.

[Then, clearing her throat:]

She didn't entirely approve of me babysitting.

[uprightness]

Well, she hardly appreciates any of us doing that. She'll come around.

[ and then, with a concerned tilt of his head: ]

Hey - you ok?

[outstandingbalance]

[If they had the chance. Natasha doesn't say that, though. She knows herself well enough to know that response is emotional, and not particularly productive.

Natasha always prides herself on being able to keep her perspective.]

When am I not? [She answers his question without actually answering it. Then adds, because this is Steve:] There was a thing, with the augment. I'm fine, but that will give you a splitting headache, won't it?

[uprightness]

Then - come on, sit down for a minute. I can get you some water.

[ evidently worried now, he takes a step towards her. anything that has to do with augments has him on alert since the incident with Winter. ]

What happened?

[outstandingbalance]

It really is fine.

[She will let him herd her into taking a seat, though. Both because she might have stood up too quickly when she left, and because she knows what he's thinking. She wouldn't have to know Steve to guess, but as it is? There's no question.]

No violent outbursts, no losing memories, and I was already female, so...

[It's a weak joke, and it sidesteps the fact that there were effects.]

[uprightness]

If they'd turn you into a man, I could at least give you some clothes.

[ he smiles and goes over to get her a glass of cold water. ]

Here.

[ he'll give her a minute before - ]

Think you'll be alright? want me to walk you?

[outstandingbalance]

[She might say that it's fine, but when he offers her a glass of water, she takes it. After taking a small sip, she presses the glass to her temple.]

Are you really that worried?

[She sighs after she says it. The cool glass does feel good. Maybe sitting a moment longer wouldn't be a terrible idea.]

[uprightness]

Yeah.

[ honestly. Maybe it's because he's used to see Natasha the exact same way he sees Peggy, tough as nails or as the more modern folks say, badass ( steve still thinks it's a crude way to describe a person ) but seeing her like this does tug worry out of him. ]

You shouldn't go into the shuttle if you're feeling sick, you can stay a bit.

[outstandingbalance]

Steve, you've seen me bleeding out. I can handle a migraine.

[Despite eveything—including the fact that he's not the first person she'd really like to see right now—Natasha manages a smile for him. Hard to stay mad when he was a friend and he was fussing.]

Space might be turning you into a worried grandma.

[uprightness]

Doesn't mean I have to like it.

[ thank you very much. he does smile a bit at her comment. ]

You haven't been talking to Peggy, have you?

[ because she did call him a nursemaid. ]

[outstandingbalance]

Not about you. [Tony may have mentioned something about being treated like an invalid, but that is not a name Natasha is inclined to bring up now.

She gives a little sigh.]

I could probably sit a minute longer, though. If it'll make you happy.

[uprightness]

[ and thank god for that. ]

Well, if you don't mind the company.

[ he takes a seat next to her. ]

Did you see or hear anything when the augment went off?

[outstandingbalance]

I'm on your boat...

[Which isn't exactly the same as saying she wants company, but she's not going to turn it down when she's the one visiting.

Her expression falls a little at his question.]

Yeah.

[For a moment then she wonders if she should lie, or hedge. It won't do anything to help them in the long run.]

Yeah, memories. Mine and Wanda's both.

[uprightness]

[ he looks at her for a moment and gives them both another moment of comfortable silence. Natasha has her secrets, it's something Steve has learned to accept and trust her to be his friend, anyway. at times, he would have liked to ease her burdens but Natasha, while easygoing and quick to try and set him up with dates, was also guarded about other things and he gave her this space.

after all, he was too, about certain matters. ]

Not good ones.

[ her expression says it all. ]

[outstandingbalance]

Not really, no.

[There were times that she appreciated the fact Steve had got to know her well enough to see that. It was rare for her that people looked past the cultivated surface, and even more rare she trusted them with what they'd see there.

Today, she can't help but feel it would be easier if he didn't know her as well as he did.]

[uprightness]

I'm sorry.

[ it's a gentle offer. he won't pry. the future is something they'll all have to deal with, either through memories or through going back home. he won't press Natasha when the memories are clearly enough to shake her otherwise calm front. ]

You know, I won't ever ask, but if you will ever wanna talk about it, you know where I live.

[outstandingbalance]

I know you won't. [Not for the personal details at least.

Natasha sighs.]

It's fine. Mostly this is the headache—and Wanda.

[That's a lie, but not so much of one that Natasha can't rationalize it. Especially when she'd rather deny that she's affected by the memories themselves.]

I figure I just caught up with Barnes now.

[uprightness]

I guess I'm behind all of you, huh.

[ it seems as if it's more of a blessing than a curse. he can't bring himself to be sorry for all those absent memories. he shifts, puts a hand over her arm. ]

we're going to get through this. we always do.

[outstandingbalance]

You say that now.

[She doesn't shrug him off, though. The contact is comforting, whether or not she wants to admit it.]

It shouldn't matter much here, though. No reason to borrow trouble.

[That sounds very reasonable, right. The kind of thing that makes sense to a spy.]

[uprightness]

It's ok if it does, for a while. I guess whatever happened, we'll have to deal with it and solve it as best as we can here. I guess we'll have to try and minimize the damage as much as we can.

[ it's easier for him, he's well aware, he doesn't know and hasn't lived through whatever it is that happened. ]

we've had bad before.

[outstandingbalance]

Bad's not the problem. We can handle bad.

[Natasha sighs, considering how much to tell him, how much he knows. She'd rather not tell him more if she can avoid it. She'd rather not explain how when things really head south, it's on the heels of Peggy's funeral. She doesn't want to give him a psychological evaluation based on actions he doesn't remember.

She doesn't want to strain their friendship here.]

It's more like we can't handle each other. That's always been our weak spot, hasn't it? The Avengers together are volatile.

Even when we're on the same side.

[uprightness]

We're all opinionated people.

[ he'll agree with her on that. there has always been strains. He'll admit he and Tony hasn't always seen eye to eye and the clashes have came and gone more often than not. ]

But when push comes to shove, when it'll go bad, we'll be able to put them aside for what really matters.

[ or at least that's what he hopes. whatever rift that has occurred, the world matters more. He just hopes they'll remember that. ]

[outstandingbalance]

The problem with that is that we're not really a team if we're only a team when the world's about to end.

[Natasha takes a deep breath and straightens, visibly pushing back the pain in her head and the emotions she'd rather not reveal. She's shown more than she's comfortable with already, even with Steve.]

Maybe that's just the way it's going to have to be.

[uprightness]

We can't give up hope, not on anyone.

[ he gives her shoulder a little squeeze ]

especially not on each other. Whatever it is that happened, I have your back. I'll always trust you to have mine.