003. text + action.

[astrobleme]

[network.]

[Shinji isn't mincing words today:]

This is totally outrageous.

I got a ticket from the local police for going 'too fast,' even though it was only - only!!! - by an infinitesimal amount. Literally a couple zeroes after the decimal point right here. I'm not a great pilot, I'll just say that, but there's no way I should be getting ticketed for this freaking crap. [Freaking crap. That's how you know he's really annoyed.]

So the other pilots should be aware that these so-called police are more interested in filling quotas for speeding tickets instead of actually protecting people. Whatever.


[action, aboard various ships in the Fleet.]

[Shinji and his bad mood can be found on the Red Fish, standing outside Asuka's room; on the Vanquish, in search of Kaworu; and on the Heron, his home ship, where he's trying to nurse a bruised ego with the coffee maker in the kitchen.]

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[mortalcoil]

[welcome to the rather dungeon-like Red Fish, friend. the hallways are sort of dark, there is an uncommon amount of skulls quietly painted on things, and some of the occupants tend to lurk around rather than act like normal, pleasant human beings.

case in point being the one-eyed boy with a face full of scars who appears at the end of the corridor, just kind of silently watching when he spots Shinji there. and it may be a trick of the light, but it sure seems like his grey eye is dimly glowing. nothing strange about this at all.]

[astrobleme]

[Shinji has visited the Red Fish in the past, including a few nights of staying over with Asuka when drama elsewhere drove him to it. He's seen so much weird shit in his life that he doesn't even bat an eyelash at the décor. Meeting up with Asuka and complaining about his speeding ticket is more so what he's--

Huh.

With a slight tilt of his head, he looks down the corridor at the person who's watching him (?). That's kind of weird, but like he wrote in his post: Whatever. He has more important things to worry about.]

[mortalcoil]

[this is what Coil gets for spending as little time on the ship as possible, whenever he can get away with it, and not caring about the majority of his crew's lives enough to keep track of who they have visiting. if he'd ever been in Shinji's vicinity before, he hadn't noticed or cared.

now he cares, though.

he doesn't say anything, but he answers the head-tilt with a questioning (maybe slightly judgemental) lift of his chin.]

[astrobleme]

[Interpreting body language isn't exactly one of Shinji's strong points. He stares in Coil's direction for a couple more seconds, his mouth a flat line, before looking at Asuka's unremarkable door. Then he looks back down the hall again, since he doesn't want any trouble from the locals.]

Just waiting for my friend, [he says, somehow curt in spite of a soft voice. His eyebrows scrunch inward and downward, just a little, too.]

[mortalcoil]

[ah, and that's enough to confirm it... because, as far as he knows, Asuka only has one other friend.

so, he unconsciously matches the way Shinji's mouth flattens out, and he heads down the hall toward him--approaching to a more conversational distance without getting close enough to be perceived as friendly.

he points at him, and regardless of the fact that the other boy probably doesn't know any sign language, he fingerspells Shinji's name.]

[astrobleme]

[Shinji's confusion can't compete with his bad mood. He waits impatiently for this guy to finish up the incomprehensible gesturing, and then he says,]

I have no idea what you're trying to say.

[Silly? Stupid? Mute? All of the above? Whatever.]

Write it down or something.

[mortalcoil]

[that impatience certainly isn't winning him any points. Coil frowns at the tone, as if he'd been willing to judge this kid favorably before, at all.

as he fishes out a pen and small, rumpled notepad from his sweatshirt pocket, he sets his jaw against the nagging feeling of weight in his head. it's how Shinji's name had felt as it had rolled from Asuka's thoughts to his, in front of that tree. too heavy, too important--and this is the person behind it?

after scrawling out a little note, he holds the notepad up so Shinji can read 'NOT HOME', and he points at Asuka's door.]

[astrobleme]

[Shinji is debating whether or not to read this note--for real, he's getting a bad vibe--but he decides what the heck. A touch condescending, he lowers the sunglasses he's wearing to check out the notepad. (His eyes are a vivid blood-red, completely alien.)]

Yeah, [he replies,] I know she isn't here. I'm waiting to meet her. I'm-- [He exhales randomly.] I'm her friend, Shinji. I doubt she's mentioned me ever, but she knows me.

[mortalcoil]

[those eyes, especially after what he'd been allowed to see behind Asuka's eyepatch, set him further on edge. he shouldn't meddle, he should leave these two to whatever business they have together... but he can't quite let it go.

maybe chalk it up to the huge, unsettling ripples that have been sent through his world lately. one friend's mind corrupting and then nearly killing him, another actually being killed, then getting stuck to the inner workings of another's mind--he is not feeling very tolerant of having something else wriggle between him and a thing that he wants to keep just the way it is.

'WHY' comes the next note, with a demanding angle to the writing.]

[astrobleme]

[For the most part, Shinji has cordoned himself off in his own little bubble. He hangs out with his closest friends from home... and maybe every once in a while, he'll talk to the other people assigned to his ship. So, it's pretty awkward to be confronted (?) (is that what this is?) by someone he's never even seen before. It's pushing his bad mood into uglier, more troubled territory.]

I'm sorry, but I don't know why that's any of your business.

[mortalcoil]

[it's a perpetual-motion-machine of ugly moods. Coil has had quite a few of those brewing lately (festering, really) and this is turning into a likely outlet for all of the nasty things he hasn't been able to let out anywhere else.

to answer, he points around at the ship surrounding them, and then points at himself. this is his ship, so that makes it his business.]

[astrobleme]

[The silent answer does little and less to impress Shinji, judging by the twisting critique of his lips. He nudges the sunglasses back into place with a sense of a finality. On his tongue, in his mouth, there's a rancid flavor that he can't seem to swallow.]

I'm waiting for my friend. Shouldn't be that complicated.

[mortalcoil]

[that snide spark is just what was needed for the messy tinderbox that his mind has become, lately.

this is who Asuka had been thinking about? this is who her whole being has been hung up on?

he doesn't deserve it. and he doesn't deserve to be taking up space on his ship--this place that has come to mean safe things for him, housing the select group of people and objects that he allows into his sphere of concern.

before he can really think about the irrationality of this burn in his blood, it pushes him forward, putting a shoulder between Shinji and Asuka's door. coming dangerously close to glaring right up in the other boy's face, and regardless of the fact that the meaning will be lost on him, he signs at him again.

'you don't belong here.']

[astrobleme]

[On a normal day, Coil's assertiveness would probably be enough to intimidate Shinji. Confrontation with a stranger often leads to Shinji backing off, apologizing profusely; he'll do everything he can to avoid making things worse. But today isn't a normal day. It hasn't been a normal day for a while, even without him being in a bad mood. He has his own litany of issues to deal with. He can't say he's interested in coddling someone else's.

So he doesn't back away from Coil, and he doesn't make excuses for himself. He doesn't turn his head to avoid the lopsided glowering. Even though his eyes are hidden, it isn't difficult to imagine he has one hell of a death stare.]

Write it down, [he says, painstakingly crisp.]

[mortalcoil]

[the muscles in Coil's jaw work as he clenches his teeth, like he actually has words to bite back. and while he might have begrudgingly written out something he'd wanted to communicate on any other day, "normal" really did lose its hold on either one of them some time ago.

so, he defies the instruction and steps forward--right into Shinji's chest if he has to--and throws his arm out to the side to point back down the hall, toward the door.

hopefully Shinji can figure out the meaning of that one.]

[astrobleme]

[Awkward. Shinji is refusing to go anywhere, so when Coil gets up close and personal, the disparity between their heights becomes even more apparent. Shinji has to be nearly half a foot shorter than Coil, so he's left staring at clothing instead of a disapproving face. All the same, he doesn't move at all other than to say,] Can you get off of me? [And he says that like he just stepped in a pile of dog shit.

Any half-baked ideas Shinji had about requesting a transfer to this ship--well, they're all but obliterated now. He prefers the Heron's resident would-be mass killer to this undeserved, inexplicable mess.]

[mortalcoil]

[undeserved and inexplicable it might be, but it apparently makes enough sense in Coil's head to keep him from backing down. if he steps away now, what would that make him? he'd trip over his own lack of logic if he stopped to think about it for more than a second, but like hell he's going to do that now.

he's already too high on the rush of maybe venting some of the poison he's been carrying around lately. Shinji's too soft a target to not want to hurt.

still, he's exercising a considerable amount of restraint when he goes to grab the other boy's collar with one hand, tugging up and shaking him a little, trying to get him to look up at his face. look him in his one angry eye and get the message that he needs to leave.

he points again with his free arm, tries to turn Shinji that way like he's going to escort a petulant toddler.]

[astrobleme]

[Here, finally, Shinji does something different: he turns his head to the side and averts his gaze. But it isn't out of shame. It isn't fearfulness, or whatever borders on a crying fit. He's doing this on purpose to prevent a bully from getting any satisfaction out of harassing him. Needless to say, he's having flashbacks to the kids at school who were ten times more menacing and equally pathetic. A testament to humanity's ugliness.

Any twisting and turning on Coil's part is mildly successful, but that's because Shinji shows no signs of fighting back. If anything, he's hanging more loosely, even closing his eyes. He won't walk anywhere under his own power.]

Mm, you people are all the same, [he mutters.] I don't know why I expected any better.

[mortalcoil]

[something clicks while Shinji hangs there without fight. Coil gets a good, close look at someone suffering without argument, detached while some other bigger, stronger force batters them around.

it's strikingly familiar. but he's not usually on this side of it.

something in him twists and curls up away from the thought, and his mouth tastes bitter. it's suddenly hard to shake the image of what would happen if the other boy's throat was struck hard enough with something, in just the right way. it would be easy--a broken hyoid bone, flattened windpipe--that would really get him squirming.

"you people," Shinji says. the phrase is a deep, insulting cut. it doesn't matter who or what Shinji is talking about, Coil is nothing like them.

he's standing tall on ego that isn't his, looming over something too familiar--and just as deserving of what it gets--that it's hard not to so something worse. the urge is right there, so when he drags Shinji to the side to start bodily walking him toward the exit, he's not only just kicking someone off of his ship. he's outrunning quite a few things before he has the chance to recognize himself even less than he already does.]

[astrobleme]

[In truth, Shinji has a tolerance for pain so high that it might seem unrealistic for someone as frail and unremarkable as him. Strangulation can't really compare to being incinerated by an Angel's laser beam... or the other unrelenting horrors of being an Eva pilot. There's something comfortingly mundane about this ungainly escort down the hallway, presumably towards the shuttle bay. He goes limp and lifeless, from his scalp to his toes; he could be playing dead; he's more of a rag doll than Asuka's recently reclaimed friend. (He's reminded of when he was under arrest for defying his father.)

There's so much that Shinji could say, too, about this, but he doesn't bother. He just laughs. Off-kilter, barely audible, he has laughter trickling out through his teeth.]

[mortalcoil]

[he hates it. he hates that sound.

this whole thing is backwards, and some part of him is horrified at his own anger. he'd let it get so far under his skin, it's out of control now, and he wants Shinji off the ship as much for his own peace of mind as he does out of fear that someone might see him fallen so far out of character.

hate. that's the only word to sum it all up.

hate. hate. hate.

Coil punches the controls to open the hatch when he drags the other boy's lifeless corpse that far. he can't eject him from this space fast enough.]