007 - Text

[onlyanapple]

Who: Crowley and you!
Broadcast: Fleetwide
Action: Málum
When: Right now!

Well, as pleasant as this star system is, and as much as I don't want to say the 'B' word and incite horrible things upon us, I feel the need to fill my time a little bit. So I've decided to stretch your minds a little bit with some riddles. Because why the hell not. Answer as many or as few as you like.

RIDDLE THE FIRST:

There was once a wealthy old man with three sons. He was coming to the end of his life and instead of dividing his money up equally amongst them like a normal person would, he decided to set his sons a task. He gave them each a paltry sum of coins, and told them to buy something to fill a room with. (Before you ask, the room is the same one each time)

The first son bought some bales of hay, but he didn't have enough to fill the room with. The second bought a bunch of rock, but these, too, failed to fill the room. The third son bought two things with his coins, and together, they filled the room and he inherited his father's fortune.

What did he buy?

RIDDLE THE SECOND:

There is a dead man in the centre of a field. He carried with him an unopened package. Before he got into the field, he knew he was going to die. How?

RIDDLE THE THIRD (spoilers: this one is the easy one):

I'm at the end of time and space, at the beginning of the end, and at the end of life. What am I?

Comments

[onlyanapple]

It genuinely worries me there were more than the ones in the world I was trapped in.

[robitussin]

what can i say the multiverse is an asshole

on a scale of one to ten how bullshit was yours

[onlyanapple]

Eighty five. Every month, or every other month, something ridiculous would happen. Even the harmless shit turned out to be humiliating- and the not-harmless stuff was deadly.

Paradisa was a little bitch.

[robitussin]

man

someday i'm going to hear about one of these places that isn't completely bullshit

[onlyanapple]

What, like there might be one out there that's not terrible in every conceivable way? Big ask, that.

[robitussin]

maybe there's one that's like an eternal tea party

you never know man

[onlyanapple]

I would want to go there only if we could put booze in our teas. Otherwise, no sale.

[robitussin]

i mean

it's not like this place is a beacon of excitement and entertainment

[onlyanapple]

Right now. On occasion it does. When Atroma want us to be more entertaining.

[robitussin]

so i should be looking forward to bullshit is what you're saying

[onlyanapple]

That's exactly what I'm saying, yep.

[robitussin]

awesome i'm so excited about that

wanna give me details about what's happened in the past

[onlyanapple]

Sure, why not.

Though I should warn you, I've found stuff happening here tends to be more...individual. Augment glitches.

[robitussin]

gotcha

i still want deets

[onlyanapple]

Sure, okay then.

People get turned into animals, little kids. Sometimes they even switch bodies which is confusing.

[robitussin]

ughhhh not the body switching

that's the worst

[onlyanapple]

Ugh I know. It's just complicated and stupid. I don't even know who finds it funny.

[robitussin]

the same people who get their kicks from witnessing a prolonged kidnapping?

[onlyanapple]

...

You have me there.