driftfleet | (no subject)

Entry tags:

(no subject)

Who: Everyone messed up by the dragon plot, and visitors
Broadcast: N/A
Action: Blue Fish's clinic!
When: All throughout the Solrius dragon plot and through the space flight to the next destination.

[So several RPG characters, a dragon, and two messianic figures walk into a planet.

Everything is suffering and tears, there's a lot of dead people, there's no punchline. But, hey, for the survivors, the Blue Fish's clinic is treating wounds and generally being a decent place to rest and recover and pray you don't see a dragon again. And for those who weren't involved, there's enough people bedridden here that there may just be someone you want to visit.]

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... I know I kind of blew it already, but... If you ever want to talk, or just need to get something off your chest, you can always talk to me, okay? I'll try to be more patient in helping.

[He nods absently, rubbing at his forehead until he comes back to himself and offers her a smile, though thin and weak.]

You didn't blow anything. Even if you had, I'm the last person who would keep track. [Leans forward to pat the edge of her mattress gratefully.] I appreciate it.

[She just shakes her head.]

Don't worry about it.

And... One more thing? If you have trouble sleeping with this, there's some tea I got from Ino to help for a dreamless sleep. I can lend you some.

[since she wouldn't be surprised if he had horrible nightmares after this.]

I- [Looks up at her in surprise.] I might actually take you up on that. If it won't deplete your supply too badly.

If I run too low, I'll just ask Ino for more. It's no problem.

Okay.

Let me know if there's anything I can do to help replenish her supply though. Like...I dunno, ground up herbs or something. [look he never made tea gramps did that]

...Nightingale? That thing you were talking about, where you'd done something worse before? What did you do after?

I'll ask her.

[she has to think. What did she do? Besides cry a lot.]

... For a long time, all I did was hate myself. You remember how I was when you first met me, right? [with the malevolence that terrified him and Mikleo. ] That was after a lot of help and recovery. For a long time, I just wanted to go to sleep and never wake up again. I even tried to, so my team could get a new teammate, who wouldn't betray them.

But... It wasn't possible. So instead, I tried to devote myself to my team. I thought I had to make it up to them- especially Bluebird. I.... Did some more stupid shit, but that isn't important.

All you can do is try to make it up to the people you hurt. And if those people tell you it's okay and forgive you, believe them. Don't run yourself into the ground to try to fix what can't be fixed.

[She goes quiet for a moment, before adding in a softer voice.]

You may never forgive yourself. That's where I am. But in your case, remember what did all of that isn't you. You're a better person than that. Just.... Talk to those you're close to or who have gone through similar things. Don't bottle it up. Face up to what you did, accept it, and resolve that you'll never repeat that.

I see.

[It sounds good. It sounds like good advice. And it's similar to what he's been hearing from Lailah and Zaveid, but putting it into practice is just so...]

...Thanks. For sharing. And I- I hope you get there, someday. You deserve to get there.

I should say that to you. You deserve it more than me, even. Since the one doing everything there wasn't you.

[That's a dangerous thing to repeat to himself, especially since it was his own negligence that lead him to it. But...

This... isn't you...

Maybe that's what she needs to hear more right now. Him punishing himself isn't going to help her in the least. Or him, really.]

Yeah. You're right. At least- it's not what I've ever wanted to be.

[But hellions and humans are two sides of the same coin. And he would do well to remember that.

He stands and leans over to pat her hand.] I'll have my comm on me if you need something.

Damn right I am.

[She manages to keep her face straight when he touches her hand, but internally, she winces a bit. Her arms still hurt, but Sorey doesn't need the guilt trip of that added onto everything else.]

Same to you. If you ever need to talk or ask me anything... I'm here. Always.

Edited 2016-09-18 03:15 (UTC)

Mm. [He nods.] Same to you.

[He doesn't exactly feel lighter after seeing Nightingale, but he does feel...less cramped. Like he's got a little more room to breathe. Seeing her awake and relatively well didn't hurt either. At least she's okay.]

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