driftfleet | ᴛʜᴇʏ'ʟʟ ɴᴀᴍᴇ ᴀ ᴄɪᴛʏ ᴀғᴛᴇʀ ᴜs ( ᴏᴘᴇɴ )

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ᴛʜᴇʏ'ʟʟ ɴᴀᴍᴇ ᴀ ᴄɪᴛʏ ᴀғᴛᴇʀ ᴜs ( ᴏᴘᴇɴ )

Who: steve rogers circa civil war + you, yes you
Broadcast: nope
Action: various;
When: throughout january

[ new year, new memories and what begins as one monstrous headache.

it takes a couple of hours to sort through everything that's new, to make sense of a kaleidoscope of memories, images and sounds. at first, he starts writing it all down, lagos, the sokovia accords, the UN, black panther.

Only the dry details and nothing of what starts to weight down on his shoulders, faces and names that inspire a heavy, intimate, terrible sort of pain.

And so an avoidance of a sort begins that lasts through the two days the new year. Hours upon hours spend on the library aboard the Iskaulit, reading books and making nothing of them. It's an odd sight, Steve Rogers in one of the corners of the room, staring at a book and randomly picking up a notepad and writing something down ( another detail that comes up, scott lang or spiderman ) and then staring at the notepad only to go back and stare at the book.

He might also be found at odd hours at the gym; evidently, taking out his burdens on a punching bag, seemingly lost in thought even as takes out what seems to be a world of trouble on the thing.

It will take these two days of isolation before those of the fleet start seeing steve rogers off the Iskaulit. He'll make a return to the Starkstruck, though this return, too, will be a reclusive matter one will have to actively seek him to find him in the weaponry or otherwise, in his room. ]

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[ at once, he feels terrible. he forgets, sometimes, how clearly she can sense other people's thoughts. he worries, terribly, of putting more distance between them, scaring her away. it was all that much easier before these new memories rolled in. ]

Seems like the Atroma are playing with all our memories lately.

[Steve's choice of wording naturally catches her ear.]

"Our" memories?

[That's what he had said. Not her memories -- they're already been over that -- but our memories.]

You remembered more, once. Things that happened at home.

[ he's tired, terribly tired, of keeping things from her. He's not even sure what it all means, really. The Atroma have taken her memories and maybe Steve is tired of playing along. ]

They changed it. I don't know why.

[She watches his face, reading each and every emotion big and small that crosses it. Suddenly, she feels very empty. Like she just now noticed that something important to her is missing. It causes her breath to catch for a moment, and she struggles to respond right away. She shakes her head, clears her throat, and tries to keep the conversation going.]

Events a year into our future, right? When I woke up here, Agent Romanoff told me... she, Vision, a "Winter Soldier," all were from that time. She'd said you were not. That we both remember more or less up to the same point. You're saying, I've lost the memories. That the "Atroma" took them.

[She'd already been told by multiple people here that she had apparently been in this fleet before as well for a fairly long time. She'd thought that perhaps her loss of memories were confined to just those of this place. It seemed, however, there was in fact far more missing. Yet, she could not say that some small part of her didn't suspect as much.]

Edited 2017-01-01 20:06 (UTC)

Yeah, they did.

[ he nods, catches her gaze and holds it. ]

I wasn't from the time. Natasha and Vision and Bucky, they all remembers things I didn't; tony, too - but he's gone home now.

[ and there's a surge of sadness, he almost wants to apologize to her for how keenly she must be feeling these turmoils. ]

They gave me all those memories two days ago, maybe it means yours will come back, too.

[The name Bucky sounds familiar in an almost eery way that Wanda has started to become accustomed to. And when she hears Stark's her brow narrows a little bit, but she doesn't press on either.]

So, that's it then. Your memories... you remember now everything about a year into the future. I'm the only one who still doesn't.

[This feeling of loss -- right now, it's more prominent than it ever was before. Having her brother around again was more important to her than anything. Perhaps losing her memories of the future had been the price she paid to be able to spend time with him again? If that was the case, then Wanda had resolved herself that it was a trade she'd gladly make. But now, for the first time since she's woken up, she seemed to be missing something she doesn't even remember losing.]

You will.

[ he can't know for sure but what drives him is his knowledge of the Atroma's nature and also his infamous conviction that this will turn out alright. he sighs and adds, after a moment: ]

and if not, I'll tell you everything, everything that happened. We'll make new memories. The Atroma can't beat that.

[The sincerity of Steve's words and gesture catch Wanda slightly off guard. Again, it seemed he was willing to show a kind of kindness towards her that, from her current perspective, Wanda's not sure she fully deserves. It makes it hard for her to meet his eyes. She smiles thinly in response. Her thoughts then drift back to her interaction with Agent Romanoff soon after Wanda awoke three weeks ago. About what the events a year in her future may be -- if they were something worth remembering.]

Everything... you think it's best I know everything?

I think you deserve to.

[ know. keeping secrets is what landed her where she was when he broke her out. it was his own fault that this happened, that they were played as much as they had been. had he told tony to begin with, none of this would have happened.

he's not about to make the same mistake twice. ]

I will tell you as much as you'd like to hear.

[She studies his face, evaluating his offer to tell her everything.]

Why did you leave? You disappeared for three days. I'm guessing it has to due with whatever you remembered. So, why did it make you want to leave?

I guess it took me by surprise. I knew from the way Natasha and Vision used to talk about it that it was bad.

[ he never asked, however, figured he would live through it anyway and so there was no point in causing them anymore grief. he doesn't regret it now, not one bit. ]

Guess I've never imagined it all to be like this.

[At the mention of Vision's name, a kind of pained look flashes across Wanda's expression, but it's gone in an instant, likely leaving Steve to wonder if it had been made on purpose or without even Wanda's own recognition.]

[Her curiosity, and just overall feeling of being fed up with feeling left out in not knowing, finally get the better of her.]

What is it? What is this thing that happens that everyone wants to keep from me? That would apparently mean just bringing new trouble here? What?!

It's not just one thing.

[ would that it all could be this simple, that it would be about just one thing. most of what went wrong he blames himself for and it's not something that he'll hide from her. ]

It was - a chain of mistakes, mostly made by me. An OP gone wrong in Lagos that got the world to be a little less - enthusiastic about the Avengers.

[She almost snorts at that last part. "The world less enthusiastic about the Avengers." She'd hate to break it to Steve, but the Avengers were not exactly looked well upon by anyone in Sokovia while they were growing up. Those people were few and far between, and usually kept any praise they had to themselves. Though, Wanda's fairly certain he already knows this considering their history of confrontations with each other before becoming allies. Her next words are venomous, a product of her built-up frustration and anger over this past month spilling over.]

So what? Stark had his turn with Ultron, and you wanted to see if you could do him one better?

[As soon as the words leave her mouth, Wanda regrets saying them. She bites the inside of her lip, and her gaze turns down and away. The anger that was there previously dissolves away into regret. After a moment, she adds:]

I am sorry. That was not fair of me.

[She knows better than anyone who really was to blame for how close Ultron came to ending the world. She thinks of saying something further, but she can't think of anything that can take back that barb a second ago.]

[She briefly considers leaving, feeling too much shame over her behavior. She even turns slightly, making a sign as if to say "I'll leave now if you want me to."]

Edited (sorry, so many edits to fix my grammar ;_:) 2017-01-10 15:06 (UTC)

You're not wrong.

[ it hurts, of course it does, her words meet their mark and they sting harshly enough that he has to turn his head from her for a moment, take a moment to swallow against the tightness in his throat. ]

I'm sorry, Wanda.

[ it's quiet and remorseful. ]

Lots of things I told Tony not to do - I ended up doing myself.

[ share with the team, he implored him after Ultron but he never told him the truth and when it came, it ripped them all apart. ]

In the end, at least he learned from his mistakes.

[ steve rogers went and made new ones and split his team in half in the process. ]

You trusted me to be better than this.

[ that is perhaps the part that stings most. he and wanda understood each other from early on, had something a tad different than what she had with the rest of the team.

and now perhaps that's ruined, too. ]

I'm sorry. I never meant to make you regret that.

[ and at home, he fears, most of all, that she does. ]

[The moment hangs there. As he was speaking, Wanda's turned, facing the door. She now stands with her back to Steve. Looking like she's about to leave after all, but, in fact, she's not moving. She just stands there, facing the door.]

[Her shoulders start to shake softly. There's a sharp intake of breath. And then her shoulders start shaking more notably. It's likely obvious to Steve even with her back turned to him -- she's silently sobbing.]

[Why? Why did she say those words? Steve had been the first of the Avengers to give her and Pietro a chance. He extended them trust when it should have been handcuffs for what they'd done. He'd been the one to convince the other Avengers to let them fight alongside the others against Ultron, a chance to redeem themselves that they did not deserve. And after it all, he convinced them to take her in. Not as a criminal, but as a part of the team. Give her a new home, a new family. He was the one training her to live up to that Avenger title.]

[He was the one who came to her room after the tragedy in Lagos. He was the one who had thought to see if she was okay, to take the time to talk to her. He tried her like a person, an actual human being and not as the weapon Hydra tried to make her into. He was the one she come to the defense of when Stark and Vision had wanted her to instead stay confined to the compound. He was the one for whom she'd willingly given herself over to be imprisoned to give him a chance to save the world when everyone else refused to see the danger, the truth that there were other Winter Soldiers out there. He was the one who had come back for her. For all of them. He broke them free again.]

[Why? Why had she said --]

[The thought cuts itself off in her mind. Her crying suddenly quiets. Realization kicks in. That, all of that... everything that had just flashed through her head... was that? She turns to look back at Steve.]

[But she does not even get a second to speak. Instead, a sudden spark of crimson-red energy suddenly flies through her entire self. Her body spasms. She cries out in pain. It feels like her head is splitting open. Her hands fly up, pressing against her temples. The pain is unbearable. The blinding white light of it, however, starts to turn to black at the edges of her vision. She totters, stumbles, and then starts to fall forwards, passing out.]

Wanda -

[ he's quicker than any other human being; not as her brother but quick, still, to rush across the room and wrap his arms around her, picking her up, scooping her close. he knows what this has, what this has to be, it must be the atroma, but it's beyond him what they're doing to her. he doesn't think of her energy, of the damage her powers can cause in her distress, he holds her close, cradles her in his arms. ]

Wanda, wake up. Focus.

[She doesn't stir. Not at first. Instead, the scarlet-red luminescence of her powers begins to swirl around her. It grows, encircling Steve within, too. However, unlike the bolt that flew through Wanda a moment ago, this manifestation is more quiet, more almost comforting. As Steve embraces Wanda, it is like her powers are embracing him back. Holding the two of them in a kind of a cloud of protection and peace. There's a slight static feel to it, maybe making the hair on Steve's arms stand up, but it is an otherwise completely comfortable feeling.]

[The energy swirls about the two of them for a few minutes, and then it slowly begins to dissolve and recede back into Wanda. Although she'd been breathing steadily the whole time, she suddenly takes a deep inhale of breath. She lets it out slowly. Her eyelids then flitter for a moment, and then slowly open. Wanda looks up at Steve, blinking blankly at him a few times. Her eyes are still red, and there's still some moisture on her cheeks from the tears. But then, a soft smile finds its way to her lips. There's a life and recognition to her eyes and her smile that was not there before. In fact, they'd been rarely seen at all the past month.]

Steve.

[Not Captain America, not Captain Rogers, not even just Rogers. No, she called him "Steve." Another thing that'd been long absent from her behavior. She continues to smile up at him for another second or two... before realizing how this whole scene would likely look to a third party. A distinct shade of pink finds its way to her cheeks, and she clears her throat, now very embarrassed. She sits up out of his arms, not quite looking at him as she tries to think of something to say to diffuse the immense awkwardness she's suddenly feeling en mass.]

Peggy's going to kill me...

[ it's a leap of faith. wanda, at first, hated others proximity and their touch and it had taken quite a long while for steve to take her hand in his, to try and offer her half-embraces of comfort.

wanda's stronger than him but an attack doesn't come. when she regains her senses, he's frowning down at her, entirely concerned but she's smiling and that's all he knows for a moment, she's smiling and she's saying his name and he thinks, she remembers and out of one grace or another, she doesn't seem as crossed as she seemed before. ]

Peggy? what for? hey - take it easy.

[She shakes her head. Of course Steve doesn't realize how awkward that might have looked to Peggy had she walked in and seen him holding her in his arms like that. She giggles softly at that, the kind smile returns to her face. She turns her head to look back at him.]

I'm all right. I just...

[She blinks for a moment, trying to put into words what exactly that had all felt like.]

I just needed to process... everything... Over two years of memories, from here and back home, that's a lot all at once.

[Her smile dips slightly.]

Sorry for the trouble I've caused.

It's ok. None of it was your fault.

[ it's all the atroma, it's their game and their rules and they play them all like pieces and steve really wants to hit something but he holds the anger back, doesn't want to upset her further. he jumps to his feet and offers her a hand. ]

It's good to have you back.

[She smiles in response, though it looks a little sad. Her apology... had she meant it to be for her behavior over this past month in the fleet? Or was it for something else? Lagos... the Sokovia Accords... Needless to say, she couldn't say that she quite feels "back to normal." She hadn't really gone anywhere this past month, so she had to reconcile that now with all her returned memories of home -- and the emotions that come with those. Needless to say, her head was still throbbing. And her heart hurt, too.]

I- I think there are some others I need to apologize to...

It could not have been easy. Feeling as though you've suddenly been forgotten by a familiar face...

[Wanda sighs. Her memories of home, of the Sokovia Accords, now having returned to her... she feels like all she's done recently has been cause problems. For Steve especially. She doesn't know if this is a conversation for another time, but she feels like she needs to say something to Steve about it now.]

Steve, about home... [She almost repeats her apology from a moment ago, but instead her mouth closes. A passing troubled look before she gives him another small smile and decides on something else.] Thank you for coming for me.

You and I, we're a team.

[ in a very personal way. they understand each other, they know each other's worries and fears and Steve values that, the trust she gave him, the way she confides at him, even now. ]

I'll never leave you alone, no matter what.

[Her smile brightens a little at that. She's truly grateful to Steve. He's done so much to help her, make her feel part of a team, a family -- both here in the Fleet and back home. She wonders if she'll ever be able to repay him for all he's done for her, or if she'll ever be able to fully express her gratitude. Perhaps the smile on her face is, at the very barest minimum, a start.]

So... what happens now? Everyone here in the Fleet from home, we all remember, but... does that change anything?

[Wanda's thoughts turn to Natasha. At the moment, she was the only one here who had not sided with Steve. Or at least, not right away. Still, Wanda's not sure where that leaves them all.]

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ᴛʜᴇʏ'ʟʟ ɴᴀᴍᴇ ᴀ ᴄɪᴛʏ ᴀғᴛᴇʀ ᴜs ( ᴏᴘᴇɴ )

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