sᴛᴇᴠᴇ ʀᴏɢᴇʀs ✮ ᴄᴀᴘᴛᴀɪɴ ᴀᴍᴇʀɪᴄᴀ (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
uprightness) wrote in ![[community profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/community.png)
driftfleet2017-01-01 06:41 pm
uprightness) wrote in driftfleet2017-01-01 06:41 pm
ᴛʜᴇʏ'ʟʟ ɴᴀᴍᴇ ᴀ ᴄɪᴛʏ ᴀғᴛᴇʀ ᴜs ( ᴏᴘᴇɴ )
Who: steve rogers circa civil war + you, yes you
Broadcast: nope
Action: various;
When: throughout january
[ new year, new memories and what begins as one monstrous headache.
it takes a couple of hours to sort through everything that's new, to make sense of a kaleidoscope of memories, images and sounds. at first, he starts writing it all down, lagos, the sokovia accords, the UN, black panther.
Only the dry details and nothing of what starts to weight down on his shoulders, faces and names that inspire a heavy, intimate, terrible sort of pain.
And so an avoidance of a sort begins that lasts through the two days the new year. Hours upon hours spend on the library aboard the Iskaulit, reading books and making nothing of them. It's an odd sight, Steve Rogers in one of the corners of the room, staring at a book and randomly picking up a notepad and writing something down ( another detail that comes up, scott lang or spiderman ) and then staring at the notepad only to go back and stare at the book.
He might also be found at odd hours at the gym; evidently, taking out his burdens on a punching bag, seemingly lost in thought even as takes out what seems to be a world of trouble on the thing.
It will take these two days of isolation before those of the fleet start seeing steve rogers off the Iskaulit. He'll make a return to the Starkstruck, though this return, too, will be a reclusive matter one will have to actively seek him to find him in the weaponry or otherwise, in his room. ]
Broadcast: nope
Action: various;
When: throughout january
[ new year, new memories and what begins as one monstrous headache.
it takes a couple of hours to sort through everything that's new, to make sense of a kaleidoscope of memories, images and sounds. at first, he starts writing it all down, lagos, the sokovia accords, the UN, black panther.
Only the dry details and nothing of what starts to weight down on his shoulders, faces and names that inspire a heavy, intimate, terrible sort of pain.
And so an avoidance of a sort begins that lasts through the two days the new year. Hours upon hours spend on the library aboard the Iskaulit, reading books and making nothing of them. It's an odd sight, Steve Rogers in one of the corners of the room, staring at a book and randomly picking up a notepad and writing something down ( another detail that comes up, scott lang or spiderman ) and then staring at the notepad only to go back and stare at the book.
He might also be found at odd hours at the gym; evidently, taking out his burdens on a punching bag, seemingly lost in thought even as takes out what seems to be a world of trouble on the thing.
It will take these two days of isolation before those of the fleet start seeing steve rogers off the Iskaulit. He'll make a return to the Starkstruck, though this return, too, will be a reclusive matter one will have to actively seek him to find him in the weaponry or otherwise, in his room. ]
no subject
[Also, you've been in a funk, that much is clear to him.
Which is why he's going to meddle in his own ways.]
I must admit, I've grown irrevocably tired of coffee, but I think you'll forgive me when you take into account the amount of coffee I have to prepare for Mr. Stark. Besides, I... may enjoy iced tea, from time to time.
[HE SOUNDS LIKE HE'S BETRAYED HIS COUNTRY.]
If it's all the same to you as well, don't tell Carter. She will give me a look and maybe even put her hands on her hips at me.
no subject
I know what you mean. the look.
[ terrifying, even if you're captain America. ]
Don't worry, your secret's safe with me.
no subject
The look! Terrible attack, the Look.
[Truly, but it's good that Jarvis has to deal with Looks from many of Howard's scorned ladies so many times. Peggy knows his resilience well, she's seen him pretty much assaulted by said ladies of wrath. The dry wit is mostly him trying to cheer poor Steve up, but he is kind of also being sincere. He stands straight and shifty-eyed.]
I fear it's too late. She's a creature of stealth; she may yet know. My apologies, Mr. Rogers, this may be my final delivery of iced tea. You'll find the next will be a cup with an ominous note written in the finest lipstick.
no subject
Let me guess - 'let it serve as a lesson for the next time you'd fancy gossiping like two old busybodies.'
[ it's said with an aloof, classic sort of scorn that highly resembles the subject of their conversation. ]
no subject
You'll be fiery and British in no time with that practice.
[He sits against the nearest sturdy surface, attentive and interested.]
... I had been surprised to learn you both have all been here for such a lengthy period of time. Though...
How are you, Mr. Rogers? You've seemed troubled recently.
no subject
[ he's willing to admit to that. there's little sense in trying to deny what most people can probably deduce from his lack of presence on the starstruck as of late. there is no use of worrying anyone else, however and he leans back on his infamous determination to remain optimistic and adds: ]
It'll get better. I guess I just needed a few days to resort some thoughts.
no subject
He's only been here for a short time, he really shouldn't put his nose in anyone's business. At the same time, Miss Carter is more familiar with his nosy behaviors when it comes to people who try to balance whole worlds on their shoulders.]
I don't doubt that it will.
[A pause.]
... I know it's not my place, but you should take care not to sort thoughts entirely on your own.
It's rather... self-tormenting.
no subject
and yet, he's still here. ]
I guess I don't really know what's to do yet. This all used to be much easier.
[ would have been, too, if he would have stayed in his right place and time. ]
no subject
[He observes Steve with some empathy. It must be a rough existence, going from one world to another. He sighs softly.]
I can't begin to completely understand the whiplash. Running from Europe to the United States has probably been the closest — until... now, I guess. [He had Ana, though. And Mr. Stark. Small mercies.] It's hardly comparable.
But — I'm more than happy to help sort your thoughts in any way I can.
Sometimes having more than just your own voice helps.
[Sometimes having just yours hinders you entirely.]
no subject
[ another sip of iced tea, another moment to think about how to shape his concerns into words. ]
When I woke up in 2012 they set my room to look like it was still the 40s, SSR shirt, an old radio. They had an agent on stand by - God knows how long. She had curled hair - women don't do that anymore.
[ she was dressed the same way Peggy did in the day, dark curls and dark red lipstick; it only annoys him more in retrospect. ]
They almost got everything right except the game on radio. It was 1941. It made the whole thing - it wasn't a really soft landing.
no subject
But oh, how silly he had been, and how much he learned working for that man.
That man with so little integrity or common decency - who had been in charge of so many. It was a travesty. Playing nice at first, but turning into a foul creature the moment someone needed a helping hand, needed something that didn't benefit him.
It is also how he learned Howard Stark was not entirely as he seemed at first glance.
He thins his lips, unhappy.]
A cruel trick, more like. I hardly see how giving you false hope helps.
no subject
[ as if there is an easier way being told of seventy-years of sleep and a whole life being stolen away in a blink of an eye. The truth is, even years after, he is still processing the entire matter, the sense of longing to people who have been dead for years, to a world that exists now only in the history books. ]
Didn't really work out.
no subject
[Listen to him getting all Britishly bothered on your behalf.
H U F F ! But he will reign himself back in. Look at him with some concern.]
I imagine assimilating was a challenge. I imagine... it still must surely be.
no subject
[ what you're used to, because steve understands that the man he's speaking to is another memory from a time gone by, one that he cannot hope to belong to once more. ]
The world is different, people are different.
[ but that sounds far too pessimistic and he adds, a moment later, ]
Some things don't change, though.
no subject
Jarvis smiles a bit.]
There are still good people in the world.
no subject
[ and it's what guides and motivates him most of all. even when faced with threats of alien invasion, HYDRA or Ultron, there were still values that people shared. ]
Many of them. They take risks every day for the sake of others.
no subject
[He nods, looking aside to the other man.]
But I imagine the good people aren't the root cause of your solemn contemplation here.
no subject
[ that's the real tragedy of it all, isn't it? in the end, good people fought good people because of the whims of one man fueled by hate. and the worst thing is, steve's reluctance to tell tony the truth had become weapon in the hands of zemo.
a pawn in a much larger game. this is HYDRA inside SHIELD, Zola's speech all over again. ]
I guess I want to do the right thing; but for a while now, I'm not sure what it is.
[ not anymore. ]
no subject
That the right thing is hard to identify.