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Who: Jade Harley
Broadcast: Fleetwide.
Action: n/a
When: 2/28

[ she's been pretty reclusive, but it's been hard to muster motivation for much. part of her has been hoping that maybe, if she's listless enough, she'll bore the powers that be into sending her back again. so far, no luck. ]

hey, so this probably sounds really weird
but make sure to bring a bunch of dirt back with you from the planets, ok??
i can grow veggies and flowers and stuff with them
but i need a lot of dirt to do it

who knows how long itll be before we see real land again, right?

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oh... thats very sweet, but its just an emoticon
anyone can make them
it doesnt necessarily imply kindness :(

Did you send it with the intent to hurt me? I don't think that you did. Because of that, I think you're kind after all.
That's my impression.

well, you must be very kind then, too
not everyone sees things like that, i think

That's all right. I'd like to learn more about how other people see things, too. There's something special about a multitude.
I would not say that I am kind, necessarily, but I like many things, which makes living easier.

thats a strange way of putting it
do you have a lot of experience with not living

[Well,]

A bit of it.
But what I mean to say is that one feels less like not living when one finds more to enjoy in life.

thats pretty sad actually
what happens when someone just runs out of things to enjoy

Living grows very difficult indeed.
But there is fortune to be found: no difficulty can eliminate hope. When one thinks one will never find enjoyment again, one may discover a thing which one had never known, nor even thought to imagine. No matter how much you know about the world, there is something special which eludes you, and it's there for you to pursue.

:)

[ it's a long few minutes before she actually responds to this. ]

who are you

[His own response is smooth and swift as all prior, as if she hadn't paused at all.]

I'm Kaworu Nagisa. You can call me Kaworu if you like. I'm an individual here, as anyone else is.

[ and then, abruptly, the feed switches to video. jade's expression seems to suggest that she's openly startled. ]

Kaworu?

[ not the same exact iteration of the one she knew, of course - but jarring, nonetheless. ]

[He accommodates her and uses video in response, so here is his face, likely similar to what she remembers, if perhaps with hair in need of trimming. But he's wearing an expression characteristic of himself—pacific, and fond, with eyes older than his teenaged face. His eyebrows are raised, though. Her surprise seems to come from recognition, but he's not sure what that means.]

Yes, I'm Kaworu. This is me.

[ she's been doing this song and dance for so long that it should be old hat by now, but it isn't. it's impossible to simply get used to running into people that you used to know like this. out of all of the billions and billions of people across all the worlds and dimensions, how did the same folks get dragged in over and over? ]

I knew you before. I mean - there was a version of you that'd been brought to another place I was in. Like the Fleet, except it was Asgard - oh, I'm not making sense, but it's nice to see you, even if you don't remember me.

[ and she means it. ]

Edited 2017-03-01 07:02 (UTC)

[There's a crinkle at his brow. This is the first time Kaworu has dealt with being recognized by anyone, and he hasn't heard much about it from other passengers, so it's very...

It doesn't feel right.] It's nice that it's nice for you to see me, [he says slowly. He's clearly trying to figure things out, including how best to word his conclusions.] But I'm not certain this could be sure. I am the only one who has Kaworu Nagisa's soul, and I know all the places it's been.

[That's... vague and surely unhelpful, but... for him, "alternate universes" shouldn't be an explanation, since he... frequently moves into alternate universes. In a case like that, he should remember. Shouldn't he?]

[ huh. the excitement on her expression flags slightly - not because she's disappointed, but because she's a little embarrassed. right. sometimes people don't want to hear this kind of thing. it can be overwhelming if you haven't been bouncing between place to place for years. ]

Well --

[ she stalls, fumbles, and then smiles again. ]

Asgard kind of exists outside time. Maybe you just haven't been there yet.

[There's no way for him to dispute her without giving up some catastrophic secrets, and Kaworu is someone who has needed to learn to choose his battles. So he doesn't say, I am already outside of time; I have already been here and there; I cannot go anywhere after this. I absolutely cannot do that. There must not be another attempt at any other lifetime.

He's quite gentle, at least in tone, when he asks,] What was that individual like? Do you know what colors it preferred?

I don't remember that much, I'm afraid.

[ existing outside of time, or outside of existence entirely-- she Feels U, bro. ]

He always tried to make Shinji be nicer to me. It never worked.

[He has a particularly frigid feeling about this.]

Shinji-kun didn't like you?

[ mostly jade just wishes she remembered more. ]

He warmed up to me eventually. Sort of.

I see.

[It's alarming, because not only does he not know which Kaworu that was supposed to be, he also doesn't know... which Shinji...

Although a prickly, lukewarm Shinji sounds familiar. That familiarity is, perhaps, what scares Kaworu so much.

...]

I'm sorry. It's difficult when others don't remember the things you do. It would be a relief if I could share in that with you.

It's alright. It's - you know.

[ she falters again here, because she really isn't sure how to vocalize what she wants to communicate. so she sort of just flaps her hand dismissively in the air and shrugs with a smile meant to be genial. ]

I'm used to it.

Yes, [and once more he is quite gentle,] but that gets exhausting.

[Anyway. While he isn't dismissive of her plight, he's wholly dismissive of his own, so he's not going to linger there. Instead:]

I am very much myself, and that is what I choose to be. I could be different from what you knew, and knowing me may not be easy. Despite your past experiences, you are meeting me for the first time. But I am meeting you, as well, and it has been special.

[ this smile this time is a little more sincere, a little less tired. maybe he has a saying for everything, but it's clear she finds that relieving and not trite. ]

It's very nice to meet you, too, Kaworu. I'm glad to have had the chance.

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