driftfleet | Bishop Mingle!

[he couldn't know for sure if that was the case, but now that he does, he kind of... nods, and takes a deep breath, sighing it out.]

Thank you...

[He might just. Lean on her a bit. He hasn't really talked about this with anybody since Tadashi got shuffled.]

[ Awww, baby ...

She'll wrap an arm around his shoulders and pull him close :) ]

He'll be alright. Just give him time.

[he's just gonna lean on her for a few here. he's been... sleeping kind of shittily. less shittily the night tadashi decided to DEADWEIGHT ON TOP OF HIM, but he's kind of been working himself half to death the last few days.]

I know...

I know, it's still hard, even if you know eventually things will straighten out.

[ She'll squeeze his shoulder gently ]

[He doesn't say anything to that, just kind of swallowing... hard... He might feel like crying. This has been very emotionally draining and he's held it together shockingly well, since he only really cried twice.]

[ Oh, no ... :( She glances over when he goes silent, to see what's going on, and ...

... Well, she'll shift to pull him into a hug. There you go, now you can cry without anyone watching. ]

[yeah, he thought was a little more okay, but... maybe not yet. he's trying to rush himself a little too hard here.

[he just needs a minute to let it out as quietly as possible.]

[ BABY. :(

She's happy to just sit there and wait while he gets it all out, though, rubbing his back soothingly ]

[it gets a little harder for a second near the end of him crying on her, but he doesn't stop immediately when he pulls back. he kind of furiously wipes it all away, shaking his head and trying to contain it. he's failing pretty hard, but he just keeps wiping it away.]

S-sorry, I just...

[he tries to smile, but his muscles are fighting him.]

I just don't really know why... sometimes.

Hey. It's okay. You've got a lot going on right now.

[ She gives him a reassuring smile ]

And believe me, bottling that stuff up? Is what's made the craziest people I've ever met go totally crazy.

[He tries to laugh a little and it comes out a shaky noise that's anything but.]

I'll t-try not to snap...

[He shakes his head.]

I just don't... get it. You've met him, you've seen him--he didn't...

[deserve it]

A-and... And Callaghan just... He said it was Tadashi's mistake.

[ She frowns, and continues rubbing his back. ]

What he said was what he told himself to justify what he did, and nothing more than that.

People ... will say just about anything to make themselves feel better about the crimes they've committed, if it means they don't have to take responsibility. This Callaghan -- [ She almost spits out the name, like it tastes bad in her mouth ] -- he's too selfish to see it any other way.

... I--...

[He swallows again, and his face is so... sad. But more than that, he looks scared.]

I tried to--

[He's never admitted this.]

He told me it was Tadashi's fault, a-and I lost control.... I-I took out Baymax's healthcare chip... The one that stopped him from hurting people.

[He has to take a deep, shaking breath, and he's still trying to keep up with rubbing the tears away.]

I was so angry... I almost... I tried to have him--

[He can't say it.]

[ Her frown turns to concern as he continues. What does she say? She would have done the same thing. She has done the same thing, and succeeded at it, as well as one can when your opponent is immortal. ]

But you didn't, did you?

[ It's not a real question. She knows, even if he didn't say it. ]

... I would have....

[The words come out so quiet, with this look of horror and confusion on his face.]

I-if Honey Lemon hadn't gotten the chip back in--if Baymax hadn't locked me out of his access port... I-I would have tried again...

Hiro ...

[ She doesn't look horrified at all. It's just a soft, sad look. Because this is just .... normal, for her ... But she knows enough about the world outside of Konoha and her world to know how terrifying that would be, and that all the shit they went through is kinda not okay for a teenager -- someone Hiro's age -- to have gone through. ]

It's not strange to feel that way. Being that angry is only a natural reaction to something so awful. Wanting that person to pay for the things they said or did ... anybody would feel that way.

[The silent crying from before is nowhere to be found now. He stares at her as long as he can while the tears are overflowing, because this is the one thing he can't stop from being ashamed of. He almost took a life. And if he had, he never would have known about Abigail. He never would have had the chance to save her. He never would have made peace with Tadashi's death to the point that he has.

[He would have become Callaghan.

[His head ducks again, and he has to cling to Ino, trying to hide his face against her shoulder. He hates crying. He hates feeling the way he does. He wants it to just... stop...]

[ She'll smooth a hand over his hair, wrapping her other arm around him ]

You have good friends, who stopped you from making a decision you would have regretted. And you learned from it. That's what matters.

[He tries to nod against her, but he's not sure it translates. He needs a couple of minutes to calm down this time, but at least he's on his way to doing so. The only people who ever saw him do what he did, he never really talked to about it. If he pauses, if he's sad for just a second... they always make contact, comfort him, bring him back to the real world.

[By now, Ino is just as capable of picking up on the signs. He's never told anyone about what he almost did. What he tried to do. What he almost became.

[Ino is the first, and the only one Hiro intends to cry about it to.]

[ This is good! She's just quiet as he makes his way back to calm.

And yeah, she can tell that was the first time he had ever tried to talk about it. Your secret is safe with her, Hiro -- don't worry. Though if this Callaghan guy ever does show up, she is really going to give him what for ... ]

You wanna know what my dad said to me, the day I came back from my sensei being killed?

[He makes just a little noise, but it's a grant for her continue. Yeah, he wants to know, he just doesn't trust words to come out just yet.]

He told me -- when something bad happens to you, you have three choices. You can either let it define you, you can let it destroy you .... or you can let it strengthen you.

You picked the third one, Hiro. [ She grasps his shoulders ] It might have been a bumpy road getting there ... hell, it's still gonna be bumpy, if Atroma has anything to say about it.

But I know a lot of people who have faced a situation like yours before, and they didn't have it in them to pick that third choice. They let that death become a part of them. They let it turn them into something that they never wanted to become. You know better than to let that happen. And I'm so, so proud of what you've become, despite everything.

[he finally actually looks at her, and this is the teariest smile he's ever given anyone, because hearing that... is really exactly what he needed. someone who wasn't hurt by tadashi's death telling him he did it right. someone who wasn't affected... the only thing more comforting to him would be tadashi's approval of his choices himself.

[he wipes at his eyes some more.]

... Thanks, Ino... I'm sorry I'm such a mess right now.

[ She smiles back, and offer him a hanky from her pocket. LMAO. ]

If you think this is a mess, you should see when I cry. Furniture and walls get smashed.

[ It's true, but ... also a joke, to lighten the mood a little ... ]

... You know, I can't say that surprises me.

[he sniffs, and it's kind of awful. he refuses the hanky, though; he'd rather get his own stuff snotty.]

I'd hate to be the guy who cheats on you. I say "the" because no one else would ever be stupid enough after that.

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