driftfleet | [Video] [From the Marivisa] [Public to the Fleet]

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[Video] [From the Marivisa] [Public to the Fleet]

[The first angle you see of the phone screen is, strangely enough, looking up at one of the ceilings of the Marivisa. Out of the corner of the screen, you can the edge of a shelf, or perhaps a desk. Slowly peering over the edge, you can see a small, Baroque style clock.

Which has eyes. And a mouth. And it's two hands twitch on the side of his small mechanical face like whiskers. You cannot believe you can make this out, but yes, it does in fact look like the clock is scowling downwards.

Then sighing. Rather dramatically, at that. Then the clock disappears. There is the sound of wood scuffling across metal, then a 'Careful Cogsworth, careful waaaugh!', and the sound of a crash as something wooden slips off of something plastic and then down to something hard. Like the metal floor.

After a moment, the phone is tilted back up into the clock's face, and it growls at all of you in an impossibly posh British accent.]

I don't know where I am. I don't know where this is. I don't know what is happening. But whatever It is? It is somehow Lumiere's fault!

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Ye-es, which explains your confusion. I'm sure Proper English is rather too intellectual for the likes of you.

[SNIFF. ALL THE HAUGHTY SNIFFING.]

EXCUSE me I am just as fun as I can be when I wish to be, I just know we have responsbilities to see to before then, you heathen!

[Honestly, HUFF. A huff that deflates.]

Har har har. Do you think -- do you think everything is still all right?

Enfoiré

[Yeah, well, TAKE THAT you English pig-dog. Your mother was a hamster and so on and so forth. ]

Cogsworth, I have known you for years and I can count on one... I could count on one hand the amount of times I have seen you have actual fun. And for the record? Work does not count as fun. Not the way you do it anyway.

[And anyone watching can enjoy seeing Lumière quickly spin around from seething disdain into genuine empathy in about 0.2 seconds. This is how they are. Best not question it. ]

I can't imagine why not? Everything was going well, no? All he has to do now is tell her and I'm sure it will be fine. We'll be human again before we know it and our lives can be normal again.

Er- failing that, there are people here with magic. People who are trying to find a way to break the curse. As a...back up.

[Blue Eyes Narrowing.]

Now See Here You Skinny Male - [Right, can't use that word, or that word, or that other word ... no, most children wouldn't know that word so. That should be safe.] - TROLLOP. You leave my mother out of this - she and my father had a LOVELY MARRIED RELATIONSHIP - which is more than what I can say for YOU - YOU - YOU UTTERLY IMMORAL PIECE OF BRASS BACKDOOR LADY'S AMUSEMENT!

[Oooooh you don't get to call Mummy a Hamster. No Siree.]

Work is absolutely fun! If you're not having fun doing work, then you're doing your work wrong. Which I absolutely believe.

[And the seething flips back immediately to concern, as he starts to pace.]

I just hope he remembers to be himself -- he can be so charming if he just lets go of his temper. She loves him - I know she must...hm?

[Blink. Blink. Blue eyes widening with hope.]

Do you mean - there might be a chance -

[R.U.D.E. He's not gonna rise to it. Nope. NOOOOOOOPE]

Careful, mon ami you are going to sprain a cog if you keep trying to insult me. Your delicate British sensibilities won't be able to handle it. Besides, who needs marriage?

[Ugh. ]

I have fun doing my work, when I do it my way. Other people have fun with it too. When you do work your way, no one has fun.

...I am sure she does? She just needs to hear it from him, perhaps that will help her realise it? Either way, they have to get it done that night.

[They don't have the time to waste any more. He smiles, a little more gentle, and certainly genuine. ]

There might! No one is sure if they can do it, but there are good people here. They're willing to try. I was hoping that if a counter-curse was found, I could bring it back with me.

[See, he really HAS been working! ]

[You start it, he's going to finish it, Candlewaxed.]

...Well you make a rather good point, who needs marriage, indeed.

[He's not going to bring up why HE is not getting married, but still.

Eye. Roll.]

Honestly, Lumiere. I have fun - and you just say that everyone doesn't have fun because You don't have fun.

[He ... thinks.]

Well. We ... I don't want to get my hopes up. Not again.

[Not after all this time.]

Seems a lot of tying down and missing out on a lot of fun if you ask me.

[He could try and make an educated guess, but he always thought it was best to leave the man to his own devices on that one. It's one area that Lumière decided, mercifully, not to meddle in.]

I'm pretty certain that no one else has fun, either. Unless, of course, you somehow make Chip's chores entertaining for him? I would love to hear how you do that.

[The gauntlet. It has been thrown. And, just like that, his tone is a little more gentle again. He'll just bludgeon Cogsworth down with his ceaseless optimism.]

It is alright to feel some hope this time, mon ami. Chances are, Belle is the one, and if not, we will find someone here. We are so close now, it has to work.

Well, some people like it, some people can tolerate it, some people would rather do what you do and some people ... just won't.

[He was one of those, and he quietly relieved when Lumiere again did not push the subject. After all, he did not want to implicate Lumiere in anything sorted, if it ever came to light.]

I tell him to make it a game - see how many chores he can do in ten minutes, fifteen minutes, and so on! It's a very entertaining game!

[Grrrrr. arrrrrrrgh. Mmmmm. You would think the two of them were manic depressive the way they switched on and off.]

Please, please let it be so. [And the clock sighs, heartily.] We have so little time left, Lumiere. So many people - the Master- all depending on us.

Do what I do being a trollop then?

[Hell, yeah, he'll bring that back to get at you with. Take that. But he'll also take the blow over Cogsworth feeling any need to delve more into his business. Lumière's self esteem is made of Kevlar, he can take it. ]

...That sounds like the most boring game in history. I am fairly certain that counts as torture. Poor, poor boy.

[Best to just smile and nod, really. That's how everyone else who knows them deals with it. ]

I know. But we have to have hope. despairing about it won't get us our bodies back, no?

[Snidest smile in all the world.]

The first step in solving a personal failing is to admitting that you have one.

[Male Trollop. So there.]

Oh, shut up.

[Grumpy now. His game IS fun. Well at least he thinks it is.]

No, it will not. Hope has gotten us this far, I suppose it can carry us a little further.

I would not call that a failing, nor would any of the charming people I have enjoyed over the years would, either.

[Don't be jelly, Cogsworth. Still, he'll count this as a victory for himself. ]

Of course it can! It only has a little way to go, now. What is the idiom? The final hurdle?

Hrm. So you say. I do not necessarily believe.

[HE IS NEVER JELLY where lumiere can hear him.]

The final hurdle, the last steps of this dance. And then ... then we will be human once more.

[Faux gasp!!!]

You would call Babette a liar? [TSK-TSK!! ] Cogsworth, that is just ungentlemanly.

[Lumière grins. ]

And then we can put all of this curse behind us and live our lives again. And speaking of our lives, you should come to the Wonderduck, when you are able. It is a most excellent ship, you will like our captain- I believe she is the one person in the universe who loves rules more than you do.

[Faint smirk.]

I would never dare. She would in fact, feather me into a sneezing fit.

[A quiet snort.]

The Wonder Duck? Where did they come with these ridiculous names.

[Oh honey. ]

I'm pretty certain she would do worse than that. She can be very sneaky when she wants to be.

It is a ridiculous name, but it is a good ship. I like the crew there, it is small, but comfortable. I will show you how to transfer, once you get off the Marsiva.

[Oh, sorry, Cogsworth, did you think moving here was a choice? NOPE. ]

[He let out a long breath, before he nodded.]

She would, in fact, make my life absolutely horrific. You are not wrong.

[His mouth twisted, and his hands flicked up and down.] Oh, so you can choose to be the same ship with your frie - people that you know?

[He did not. BUT ... he is okay with it but not saying it.]

[He caught that, buddy, HE DID!!! ]

Oh, yes. You can choose to be in whatever ship you wish, so long as they have room. You will be moved onto another ship once you leave the Marsiva, but it is only a matter of paperwork.

You like paperwork.

That is true ... I love paperwork...

[Yes, this is Cogsworth rubbing his chin thoughtfully, before he claps his hands together.]

Yes, very good! Where is the paperwork?

[Clearly you sold him just by paperwork. Nothing else here to see, Lumiere. Nope nope nope.]

[Yep, this is clearly the ONLY reason ever. Still, Lumière will take it. He doesn't want you on board because he misses you or anything, whatever.]

I shall send it onto your communicator, mon ami, you can have great joy in filling it out.

[Ping, there you go.]

[Absolutely the only reason you have no idea there is anything else because there IS isn't it.]

I shall have the greatest joy, because it's all about the joy with me. I am a fun individual - OOOOH triplicate!

[Yes he is gleeful.]

[He knew this would make the little nerd happy. ]

...Triplicate. Yes. That is, indeed, very fun. Don't overdo it now.

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[Video] [From the Marivisa] [Public to the Fleet]

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