bye bye love - bye bye sweet caress - hello emptiness...

[thespaceopera]

[It’s been nice and peaceful for a few days, hasn’t it? Everyone in their little cages with their creature comforts, learning all about each other through the strange rooms that have opened up at night… It’s been a wonderful experience, wouldn’t you agree? For some, that blood-curdling scream from the first day has not been forgotten.

A few days into calibrations, the main screen that has been conspicuously silent (aside from passenger use) flickers to life. Anything already playing on the screen is overwritten by a video feed of plain metallic walls not unlike those housing the Passengers. It’s difficult to tell what is going on offscreen. Shadows are uncertain, dancing everywhere; nothing can be gleaned from the shapes no matter how much they are analyzed.

The audio, however, is loud and clear.]

—can’t do this to us, [a woman pleads, her usual saccharine tone absolutely dripping with fear. Some may recognize the voice as belonging to Diamond.] You can’t! We followed orders exactly. It was in the terms! I don’t underst… oh no. No, no, please no don’t do this no no NO NO NO!

[Her voice increases in pitch and tremor until it’s drowned out in a garbled shriek of pain. The shadows dancing on the wall grow frantic and violent. The show is accompanied by sounds of heavy things slamming and the unmistakable whirring of a drill.]

I DON’T WANT TO DIE!! NO NO NO NO NO N—

[The woman’s shrieking cuts off immediately. In the newfound silence, something else drags itself weakly across the floor, getting closer and closer to the camera. SLAM. Until that stops, too.

A man’s voice comes through this time, thready and weak like a dying heartbeat. It's Beau, though he hasn't been heard by Passengers for quite some time.]

A-and now… you come for me. [The speaker makes a choked sound like a laugh or a sob.] All we ever did... was try to... make you happy.

[The whir of the drill begins again, but the feed ends.]

Comments

[ladybro]

[ ...oh.

he launches into an explanation without pressing. without question. without interrogation. and kate feels a humility coil close to her heart -- an understanding that she is being gifted something, no matter how terrible the tale. to harbour anyone's faith and trust like this, no matter what his motivations for telling her might be.

and in the end, although the details are tragic, they aren't difficult to believe. between syllables, her thumb traces a supportive line across the back of his shoulder -- the one connected to his flesh arm.

she doesn't let him go. she doesn't push him back. she's clever enough to recognize what he's doing for what it is: a peremptory strike, an attempt to test whether she'd recoil. kate only holds him more firmly in place. it's likely she won't loosen her grip until she can no longer feel his heartbeat thundering so obviously through his chest. ]

I'm sure it was terrible. But -- you're not there. Not any more. [ and yet he's nevertheless held against his will by aliens looking to use him for their entertainment; the differences are stark, but minimal. ] I'm not going to blame you for surviving.

[ nor will she allow herself to be a figure of concern or fear for him. she will make it known unequivocally -- she's in his corner. ]

[padadin]

[Once again, his body deflates, and Shiro sighs with relief. There are no words to describe how much this means to him - so he tries in the way she likes, too. So he pulls back (a bit reluctant, maybe, but he doesn't want to abuse) and offers a little smile. He looks and sounds tired, but also touched.]

Will you punch me if I try to thank you again?

[There, see! Attempt at a joke! He glances at her wrist again, the idea of finding ice returning to his mind. But he's not done yet, and he doesn't think she'll let him fuss over her twice in a row. Especially if it ends up looking like he's escaping the conversation.]

Keith and Lance said something similar - they got to see it. To feel it. During the calibration thing. [Even if it's ended up well, he's still obviously displeased about that, frowning pretty hard, hands closing in tights fists on his lap.] They weren't happy about me not going to them for support, but they were accepting. They didn't blame me, they still want me as their leader. And I-- [Thinks they're nuts, probably. Oh, wait, he's supposed to be trying not to think like that.] --I don't know where I was going with this.

[He rubs the back of his back, looking at a wall and trying to put his thoughts in order. Usually he's great at giving speeches and talking about bonds but when it comes to his own stuff, there's so much he is unsure about. There's something about her, too, mixing in that mess that are his feelings toward his life, something he hasn't acknowledge yet.]

I think what I'm trying to say is - I just wanted to protect them. I didn't want my stuff to reach them. I did know they would be there if I had asked. I trust them. And... [Black eyes finally look at her again, determined to see this conversation through.] I trust you, too. You're my crew--

[The little smile returns - he's aware he's being too serious and heavy with the mood right now.]

--Captain.

[ladybro]

[ she gets it. she gets it more than she dares to say. kate is frank and open and honest about a lot of things -- but not everything. when someone asks her how she got started in the hero business, she's always quick to tell an easy truth about being a terminal do-gooder wanting to (well) do good. but the easy truth isn't the whole truth.

and the truth is something she's only told to her therapist (the very finest that bihsop money could buy) and jessica jones. -- and winn, but he's not even the fleet anymore. kate doubts he'd remember her, let alone the story she told him when they were drunk and everything was miserable. she wouldn't tell her team, either. it's a detail she's long since decided they don't need to know.

she stays kneeling in front of him -- hands draped gentle-like on his shoulders. her smile stays in place; no hint of hypocrisy surfacing in her blue eyes. ]

Going through shit doesn't make you shit. [ crass, yes, but she delivers the message with conviction. ] Just gets you covered in it. Shiro, [ you're my crew he says and she knows what that means to him. ] Do you maybe wanna get a drink? Somewhere away from the big screen. We can talk more.

[padadin]

[It's crass, yes, but that means it isn't a prepared speech. It comes with honesty, it comes with her way of saying things, and that's what's most important. She wants to keep talking, too, and that alone means the world to him. She could offer a bowl of nails for all he cares, this is what he needs.]

You know exactly what to say, huh. [But he's still smiling, his tone and expression obviously amused. This is good. Her company is good for him.] I haven't had a drink in forever, I wouldn't mind that. We could find some ice for your wrist, too. Just in case.

[Oh yeah, he hasn't forgotten about that. Speaking of her wrist, he gently takes her hands off his shoulders, giving them a thankful squeeze before standing up and... just pulling to get her to stand up too, no effort. His mind is tired but his strong body is fine, thank you.]

[ladybro]

[ she doesn't want to say she's been around this block once or twice before. with herself, with others, with sorting through clint's crap. the way he hides his deeper-than-skin scars like some kind of carnival shell game. they both do.

but she's glad he's talking to her. or beginning to talk to her. even as he frets; even as he still seems shaken. but not so shaken that he doesn't prove himself handily strong in pulling her to her feet. a quiet huff of surprised laughter and -- yeah, he makes easy work of it. she doesn't resist. ]

Just in case. [ she indulges. flexing her wrist with a brief wince. truth is, she knows she doesn't take as good of care of her body as she should. too much coffee; not enough greens. and injuries get ignored until they can't be ignored any longer. luckily for her, there isn't half as much of a reason to get injured in the fleet as there's been back home. ] I make a mean Tom Collins if they've got the stuff.

[ kate only now releases lets go. relinquishes their connection, for now, as she turns towards the hallway. ]

[padadin]

[The laughter is music to his ears, though the magic doesn't last long because yeah, he totally sees that wince. Good thing she accepts his suggestion, because there's no way he'd back off after that.]

I'm guessing that's a mixed drink. I usually stick to beer. [The physical connection may be broken, but Shiro is finding her mere presence comforting after the little moment they just had. So he follows her closely, their conversation about drunk times coming back to him.] I can give it a try, but you remember how you got me to dance, right?

[Only one drunk experience. Cadet times seem so long ago now.]

[ladybro]

Hey. [ she offers a show of empty palms -- of supplication, perhaps, except that it's impossible that she should succumb so easily. ] Trying it is all I'm asking for.

[ -- because she remembers the dance. and she remembers it fondly. kate has taken a fair few hits, of late, to her sense of stability in the fleet. it seems that whenever she turns around, shiro is there to prop her up a little. even if she doesn't say it.

it's only fair that she do the same for him. ]

[padadin]

I can do trying. I own you way more than that.

[It's not just him being nice - there are heavy feelings behind his words. Gratitude, respect, valuable friendship, debt. All warriors have demons, he thinks, and one day he'll make sure to be there to tell her it's ok too if she needs it.

First, though, gotta make things right. As soon as they enter the kitchen, he moves to grab some ice, then extends his human hand toward hers, silently asking for her own.]

[ladybro]

[ she rolls her eyes -- good in nature, however, and only to communicate that she still thinks he's making too much of a fuss about the wrong thing. her wrist is fine. right? kate's fired her bow with worse.

nevertheless, she offers him what he asks for. she holds out her hand, palm up, and fits it snugly against his. ]

You don't owe me anything. [ a beat. ] Friends are there for friends. There's no scorecard.

[padadin]

[Message received and accepted! He doesn't think he's making too much of a fuss, but the fact she does only adds to the fact she's letting him do this anyway. It's appreciated.

He holds her hand gently as he puts the ice on her wrist, chuckling at her comment.]

I can't argue with that, even if it goes against my point. I'll try a drink for my friend then. Better?