driftfleet | [Semi-open] Stress finally takes its toll

Who: Shiro and Ulaz, Shiro and you
Broadcast: No
Action: on Duotera (for Ulaz), the SS Blameless (open)
When: Throughout this week
Warnings for the Ulaz thread: Mentions of Shiro's year in captivity, possible mentions of torture, experimentation and losing his arm; Shiro having a panic attack with flashes of said memories.

1. Closed to Ulaz

[After a really, really shitty month, Shiro must admit it: Ulaz arriving has been a blessing for his mood. Part of him knows it's messed up that people are brought back from death, but it's not like he can do anything about Atroma's plans (yet, he hopes) and damn if he won't enjoy something nice actually happening to him for a change.

He already lost one "purple". Let him have the other.

They arrive to a nice system, too, which also helps, considering they're still waiting for the third dream to happen. One less thing to worry about. So the main issue in Shiro's mind now is... questions. So many of them. When Ulaz arrived, Shiro wanted to give the poor man time to settle down, so he kept himself in check. But he can't wait any longer.

So time to make a good use of the planets! Duoatera has a nice climate and beautiful hills, so Shiro invites Ulaz for a hike. With only nature (and Procyon of course) surrounding then, they can have a private and calm conversation while exploring. So here is Shiro now, near the hills area, dressed in a nice jacket and ready to go, dog sitting next to him like a good boy.

He smiles when he sees Ulaz approach.] Hey. I'm glad you came. Have you ever gone hiking before?

2. Open - SS Blameless

[Maybe you heard from Ulaz, or from Shiro's teammates, or his crew - or maybe you've just been wondering why Shiro hasn't been around much. But the story is only one: someone finally passed out from all the stress and is now stuck in bed. And hey, maybe you've also been wondering why that someone hasn't taken the captain's room when he's now the only captain of the ship.

Well, wonder no more! Because that's where he is now. You can thank the very tall and very strong purple alien for that.

They haven't moved his stuff yet, but Procyon (now quite bigger and with longer hair) is there with him, taking advantage of the bigger bed and taking care of his master at the same time. And Shiro does have his communicator and tablet, because resting isn't a word he knows of.

He's bored, alright.

So if you're visiting him, you'll find him going through documents on his tablet. Please stop him before stress starts going up again.

Or maybe you are just passing by for whatever reason, making your way through the Blameless' slippery hallways. Since the captain's room currently has the door open (you can also thank the alien for that), Shiro will see you walk by and take the chance to speak up.]

Excuse me, can I ask you for a favor, please? [He almost sounds... ashamed? To be asking this. He feels silly asking for little things he could be doing himself, okay.]

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

[Well, Ulaz had tried not to disturb Shiro too much. At least he didn't have to move over that far when Ulaz sat down, trying to sit closer to the edge of the bed. But yes, he was rather tall by comparison it was hard.

And Procyon didn't seem at all disturbed]

Stress builds. Perhaps it just hit a point where it came out in a non-productive way.

[Since passing out is not productive... mostly. Sleep was good, but a panic attack was not the way to get there]

I want you to rest for a few days. No training, no work. Just let your body recover. Or it will happen again sooner than you may like.

[Procyon isn't disturbed at all! He's comfortable on Shiro's chest... that is, until Shiro suddenly sits up, not liking what he's hearing. Ulaz can't be serious, can he? He has things to do.

Besides-] I'm fine! I don't need to stay in bed for days being non-productive!

[Yep, using Ulaz's very same words on purpose.]

[What is with Shiro and forgetting that poor dog is there? Ulaz again reaches out to make sure Procyon is okay - quick reflexes - before he turns back to Shiro, a stern look on his face]

You are not fine. You collapsed not that long ago. You need to let yourself recover or we will be having this talk again. Bed rest may be non-productive for your work, but it will let you heal.

Spend the time doing something to focus on something less stressful.

[Ulaz is not letting you off easy, Shiro]

[Ulaz keeps shocking him, that's what! Usually he isn't this distracted! This is ridiculous! An outrage! We demand a second opinion!

Shiro is frowning pretty hard, and his hands go to his hips ~~like the mom he is~~, looking absolutely furious and pretty much offended, let's be honest here.]

Alright, so I collapsed, I can sleep it off today. I don't need to be bed-ridden for more than that! You're exaggerating.

[It shouldn't really be that shocking. It just so happens to be words that Shiro doesn't want to hear. But unfortunately for Shiro, he's hit the immovable wall that is a determined Galra. His team might appreciate that Ulaz is willing to go up against Shiro's stubborn.

As Shiro puts his hands on his hips, Ulaz just sighs, completely unimpressed by the action. It was definitely a reaction of someone not intimidated by that. He did reach out to give Procyon a few pets because he's being a good dog with his master being stubborn]

You had a panic attack and blacked out. That's a sign you need to reduce stress and give yourself a chance to recover. The quickest way is to spend a few days not working. It's not a permanent situation. It's just for a few days. It's not like I'm making you sleep the entire time.

[Wow he made Ulaz sigh, where is his achievement trophy.]

The panic attacks are not new.

[He expresses with more willingness than he usually would. It's not something he likes to admit or talk about. But this is Ulaz, who knows all his shit anyway (and doesn't want to tell him, tsk tsk), and it's not like the current ~~argument~~ doesn't already bring it up anyway.]

Don't you dare make me sleep the entire time. No drugs or anything similar, understood? I'm not sick.

Or weak. [He adds that last part quite offended - he doesn't like being treated like he's made of glass.]

[Ulaz will be sure to get him a trophy for that... or a picture of one]

I am not surprised that they aren't new. But you should take them for the warning that they are.

[He already said he wasn't going to make Shiro sleep the whole time, but oh well?]

Only if you ask for something to help you sleep. Otherwise, nothing of the sort. No, this does not mean that you are sick or weak. It is to help your body recover from a stressful event. Not giving yourself time to recover will keep wearing you down.

[Oh great, so his panic attacks are a warning now? As if they didn't make him feel broken enough. But then Ulaz keeps talking and... well, at least he does say he isn't sick or weak, but it's hard not to feel that way when he passes out just over an argument and he's being bed-ridden.

A sigh as he looks down at his lap, which suddenly finds itself full of dog head. Shiro buries his fingers in Procyon's fur - this is going to be a long week, isn't it.]

They aren't a warning - it's PTSD. I'm not dumb, alright, I recognize it. [He doesn't need a doctor to know what his mind is going through.] It's always been in my head, though. My body - it's always been able to carry on. To keep on fighting. It can't get this bad, Ulaz. I can't let it.

[The frustration is obvious in his voice, in the pain in his eyes. The Galra have already taken so much from him, what else is coming?]

[Ulaz is quiet as Shiro spoke. He could hear the frustration in his voice, see it in his eyes. It hurt him; that much was obvious. Probably more than Shiro knew, Ulaz wished there was a way to simply take that away. However, there wasn't]

I never believed you were dumb for feeling what you are feeling. You have been through a lot. Sometimes one can fight on for a while, but eventually it may not be as easy. Try bed rest for a few days, see if it helps. Paying closer attention to how you are feeling may prevent it from happening again. So you don't have to do this again.

[It was never easy, he wants to say, it only gets worse. But it's not something he wants to admit. First, because he doesn't liking admitting to what he sees as weakness. And second... because it'd only prove Ulaz's point. Again.

After a long pause and what may be ALMOST sulking but it totally isn't, thank you, he finally nods.]

Fine, I'll bed rest for a few days. In the captain room, I guess. Happy now?

[Yes, don't say that. He's already saying he knows Shiro has problems. But he doesn't see it as the weakness that Shiro seems to think it is.

Oh of course Shiro's not sulking. That's why he ends the thought like that. Also Ulaz is unmoved by not sulking Shiro]

I am. You can do other things except work, but you need to rest. After a few days we'll see how you're feeling.

[Semi-open] Stress finally takes its toll

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