001;

[privateeyed]

Who: Ben and you folks
Broadcast: Yes
Action: SS Huntress
When: now

action; SS Huntress

[Ben doesn't take teleportation well. In fact, if the confetti and the music didn't tip the ship off, the loud cursing probably does - there you go, Huntress, your security officer is here]

What the fuck—give a guy some fuckin' warning next time, geez! God damn teleporting bullshit.

[once he's calmed down, though - and picked up some of the pudding because far be it from him to turn down free food - he's wandering the ship, peeking his head into rooms to see what's what]


broadcast;

[once he's somewhat settled in and found a place to sit and digest everything going on, Ben decides to set up a broadcast to get some Shit Done]

Anyone here good with cybernetics? Or - I don't know, computers? Advanced stuff, can give you the specfics if you're interested. Don't need you right now, I'm just covering my ass just in case.

[he pauses, and maybe realizes he should . . . introduce himself. Like a normal person would. You know, instead of just getting down to business]

Uh - anyway, name's Ben; if you don't know shit about cybernetics . . . I don't know, come tell me about the weird crap going on here. Or stuff I should know. I like being informed.

Comments

[privateeyed]

What a bunch of shit. That's my educated statement on the matter.

[passingthrough]

It would be more impressive with citations and footnotes, but I guess it'll do.

[privateeyed]

I'm not a brainy guy, I'll leave that to someone who knows what they're doing.

[passingthrough]

Kind of have to be a little brainy for the detective work, no?

[privateeyed]

I'm just brainy enough to do my job. Past that? Dumb as fuck.

[passingthrough]

Now, is fuck even dumber than shit?

[privateeyed]

[he snorts] Could be. Depends on your preference and tone of voice. Gotta mix it up every now and then, you know?

[passingthrough]

Oh, definitely. You know, I'm starting to believe you could get that R rating after all.

[privateeyed]

To be entirely fair, all I'd gotta do is say fuck a few times. But yeah, easily.

[passingthrough]

True. They make it too easy. [Though she swears more rarely. She'd definitely earn her rating differently.]

So, Ben, the PI, any questions about the fleet?

[privateeyed]

Disappointing, isn't it? I want a challenge. [for ratings only]

Hmm. [he has plenty of questions] Got any idea how long this shit's been running? What's the longest time anyone's spent here? Does it ever circle into Earth's neck of the woods? Do these Atroma fuckheads ever show themselves? Can I write them an angry e-mail?

[he gives her a two finger salute] If you can answer all of those I'll stop interrogating you.

[passingthrough]

I think it's been a little over four years. My co-captain, Vash, has been here the longest of the people who are left I think. Or at least he's the one I know best who's been here the longest. I think he arrived pretty early. Maybe day one. [Which she hadn't really thought about, but it kind of hits her as she tells him. Maybe something to bring up with Vash sometime. Maybe something to definitely never bring up.]

Haven't seen anything that looks remotely familiar, so we're decently far from Earth. An Earth anyway. Assuming this reality even has one somewhere in the galaxy. The Atroma have a couple of representatives we've seen, though not in person as far as I know. It wasn't too long ago that they replaced the old ones probably violently for our viewing pleasure.

And...what was left? Oh, right, I don't know their email address, but if you type it they might have a record of it.

How was that?

[privateeyed]

Jesus fuckin' christ. [is what he finally says after digesting all of that, flesh hand coming up to scrub at his face] If only I got answers that easily back home.

All right. [he lets out a breath] Is there anything I should know? Y'know, shit that doesn't come in the welcome package.

[passingthrough]

Did I take all the PIing out of your sails? None of it's a secret really, so just a matter of finding someone who hasn't already answered it 400 times or who doesn't mind making it 401.

Mmm...lots and lots of things. Things you'll look back and be annoyed that no one told you at first. And then one day things you won't bother to mention because there's too much to fit in and it's a lot to pile on someone still processing something like "I'm in space" or "I've been kidnapped" or "what the fuck is a protein gel?"

It's been a minute since I read a welcome package. Did it mention augment malfunctions?

[privateeyed]

So it's basically either a learn as it happens or oh by the way kinda scenario.

[oh that's going to be fun. He loves surprises]

Someone on my ship did. I already deal with that shit, the - turning into a kid part or the other crap is new, though.

[passingthrough]

Pretty much.

You mean regular mechanical glitches? [Thinking of how he started the post after all.]

[privateeyed]

Yeah. It's older tech and I've put it through some shit, so it'll glitch or just stop working. Nothing too big - and it usually fixes itself after a few minutes.

[he shrugs] Pretty normal for cybernetics, honestly.

[passingthrough]

And I thought waiting for a computer to restart was a hassle.

Are they common back home? The cybernetics.

[privateeyed]

I've played around with the old ones - how the hell did anyone have patience for all that wait time?

[he makes a face] Yeah, they're pretty common. Lot of folks have the smaller ones that they implant into your arm or your neck - it's a stupid trend. I mean, some benefit from it, like they get 'em for their jobs or because of some medical reason, but - for the most part now it's just - trendy bullshit.

When I got mine it was still - mostly for folks who needed it.

[passingthrough]

It gave us the motivation to make them faster at least?

Wrath was from a world that did things like that to be on trend. Kind of an awful sounding world in a lot of ways though. Still a better reason to do it than what it was usually used for back home.

[privateeyed]

Good point. But damn - ya'll had some slow as hell tech.

[a snort] I know it seems hypocritical for me to be against it, but I didn't really get a choice when it came up. Life-saving bullshit or whatever. [don't be so casual about it, Ben] It's not too bad, but - what'd they use it for back home?

[passingthrough]

Just wait until you meet someone from a world with no tech. Or no tech as you recognize it. Maybe some magic.

Sometimes life saving and for mobility where it had been diminished.

[But]

Mostly to build up an army.

[privateeyed]

Magic's kinda cool, though. Tech and no tech is - y'know, normal. World didn't always have this shit. Magic, on the other hand? I definitely want to see some.

[ah, there it is. One of the reasons he hates cybernetics and mods]

Figures. It ain't that different where I'm from either.

When I was in the army we got offered the newest bullshit. They wanted us to be better and faster for their shitty war. Most of my squad turned them down.

[passingthrough]

They were lucky to get the option. [Leaving it unspoken, but probably obvious for the moment, that this wasn't the case where she was from.]

I guess people have the same bad ideas in lots of places.

[privateeyed]

[he just snorts. He can definitely pick up on what that means]

Doesn't surprise me. When it comes to armies and wars, history makes the same mistakes over and over.