Do Not Feed After Midnight

[pidge_out]

Who: Pidge and ALL OF YOU
Broadcast: Accidentally YES
Action: Yesssss
When: Right Now!

[Video Broadcast]
[The feed is shaky. For a split second this might be concerning, but then there are some snorting giggles while the image comes into focus and reveals... a whiteboard. It's covered in scribbles and notes and papers and magnets and string, and most of the handwriting is fairly neat. If your attention stays on that neater handwriting, you might realize that the things on the board are trying to piece clues together. If you know him, you might even recognize this as being the board in Keith's room on the Huntress.

That's not why the feed is on, though.

Written into the margins of every bit of space not occupied by this apparent search are questions, written in large, bold, black letters that at times go over what was already written. And these questions are not... particularly scholarly. They're mostly things like--

"Do aliens have sex?" "What is Hunk's headband hiding?" "Lance doesn't actually know spanish, Change My Mind" "Who cut Shiro's hair anyway?" "Shut up Lance let me write my Shhit" "Aliens = Birds?" "why does Coran moustAche"]

Okay, look! [Pidge is not at all trying to hold back any laughter. In fact, Pidge seems pretty damn pleased with the scrawled, awful musings that have been left there. Though it does kind of sound like she's not quite talking to the community over the comm. It sounds like Pidge is talking to someone in the same room as her.] Someone's gotta ask the hard questions and I'm the brain here so it's gonna be me, duhhhhh.

[Tap. Tap. It sounds like Pidge is hitting the side of her comm. Because obviously she's just trying to take a picture of her own brilliance.] Nnnthefuck, why's it not working...

[Action: the Huntress]
[So it turns out that Lance gave Pidge some Drinks and then brought her back to his shared room to make sure she didn't trip all over herself while returning to the Bishop...]

Comments

[goldenglasses]

That's some good detective work you got started there. [Don't mind Vash. He's mostly here in the hopes that Shiro chimes in. That should be good.]

[pidge_out]

But questions are no good without answers. I need answers!

[goldenglasses]

And answers only exists if there are questions worthy of those answers! So it's a good thing you have such good questions for the answers which you are searching! [Yes he's talking in circles and trying to be a confusing ass.]

[pidge_out]

[Hold on, Pidge is squinting and making gestures with her figures while she tries to interpret that. She's too drunk tipsy for this shit.]

That's.... round. [The words "circular logic" has momentarily escaped her.]

[goldenglasses]

It is round. So! What is the ultimate question for which you are seeking answers for these questions that you have written?

[pidge_out]

I WANNA LEARN MORE ABOUT THE SPACE POCKETS!!!!

[goldenglasses]

[This is a mistake. This is a mistake. This is a mis-] What do you know about space pockets so far? [Dropping into a lower more "secretive" tone.] Have you heard about the space pocket lint yet?

[pidge_out]

I know that they fold time and space and are totally hidden! [And there goes the voice drop, just because Vash did it first.] Ohmigosh are we the lint???

[goldenglasses]

No, we're not fluffy enough for that! Cats are the lint!!!!!! [What is he even saying right now?]

[pidge_out]

I KNEW IT!!!

[No she didn't, what--]

Of course it's cats. SPACE CATS.

[goldenglasses]

And what do space cats have? Space fleas!

[pidge_out]

[OVERDRAMATIC GASP.] YOU'RE RIGHT.





But Green's metal and doesn't have fleas. Unless I'm her fleas. ..Flea.

[goldenglasses]

[Who's green? Eh, doesn't matter. He speaks as if this is the biggest and best discovery ever.] I don't know?! Has she ever itched when you're around!?

[pidge_out]

[There's far too long a pause while she thinks back on this.]


I-- I don't remember??? Does metal get itchy??

[It doesn't. But alas, Pidge can't remember this.]

[goldenglasses]

Of course metal gets itchy! Everything gets itchy now and then! Especially if your hands are full because then your nose will always get itchy!

[Vash CAN remember the fact that metal can't get itchy, but he's having too much fun talking nonsense.]

[pidge_out]

OH NO.

I HAVE TO TELL THE OTHERS.

[goldenglasses]

YOU HAVE TO TELL EVERYONE!

[pidge_out]

[This is the part where she bolts away from her device and goes yelling around the room.]

THE LIONS ARE ITCHYYY!!!

[goldenglasses]

[As she runs off Vash breaks out into loud, uproarious laughter. Happy in the insanity he hoped he had just created for her ship.]