[ open ] .002 though I am empty, I still warn the sailors on their way

[watermarks]

Who: Katara
Broadcast: Written, Video
Action: Yes! Blue Fish and Planet
When: Message sent Monday, midmorning. Some backdated shuffle action.

[After giving it some thought, Katara decided to make an open network post. She wanted to write it out, but as part of her habit from living with Toph, she decided to both transcribe and say it aloud:]

I want to thank the person who put the memorial into place. If you get in touch with me, I can help you get the number to fill in.

I know that a lot of us have been pretty impacted by what we found here. I don’t know how long we’re usually on a planet, but I was thinking… it might be good to have some kind of remembering ceremony by the memorial? It feels important to find a way to show honor to the lives that were lost here. I don’t know what kind of funeral rites they would have preferred, and there’s no way to respectfully move them, so… maybe some fire and some music? Does anyone have any ideas?

I know that this might not be for them as much as it is for us, but… I think that’s important too.

(OOC: Please feel free to threadjack all up in this conversation; Katara would like to make this a community effort, because it feels like it’s something that’s needed to her.)



[The confetti is still as annoying as the last time it happened, but Katara is happy to be on her brother’s ship. She’ll want to wander around and meet everyone, though no doubt Sokka will soon join her to give her an Official Tour. (Did she really need to know every single detail about the ship and all its history? Probably not, but now she does, unless someone saves her.) She’ll spend some time in the kitchen and try to figure out what she needs to bring up from the planet, and then do the same thing in her new room.

Before she heads back down to the planet, she’s going to try to linger long enough to meet everyone.]


[Since the Blue Fish will likely be her permanent home as long as she’s on the fleet, that means that Katara will be doing what she can to take advantage of the free… everything. Her first stop is a hardware store where she picks up a wheelbarrow and several cans of water-based paint. The color - some shade of blue, though she wants something a little lighter too. She’ll be there pondering over choices for a bit.

She also has no qualms about stealing a good idea from the Vanquish when she sees it, and will pick up a chalkboard for the kitchen there as well. She spends a long time staring at a small electrically powered fountain for noise, trying to decide whether or not to get it. For now, she walks away.]

Hmm… maybe I should get different chair too?

[So feel free to find her, either at the hardware store or wheelbarrowing her way back to the shuttles! After dropping the paint off in the cargo hold, she’ll return once more to the planet for a bunch of canned fruits and vegetables and rice… and maybe go back for that fountain.]

Comments

[watermarks]

Why, what?

[Why did she want to speak with Aang or why did she want to contact him again (though she thought he knew that) or why did she want to give everyone an opportunity? She honestly wasn't sure what he was asking.]

[dothelokimotion]

Why is it necessary for everyone to have an opportunity?

[watermarks]

[It's a question with an answer that is so instinctive to her, that Katara has to pause for a moment to try to put it into words.]

It's not "necessary," but it's something I'd prefer. This is something that impacted the whole community, and so the whole community should have an opportunity to address it. I want to do this for the people who died, but I want to do this for myself too - to show honor and... not leave things undone. So I want everyone else to have that chance, too.

[Because she thinks it will be good for them.]

[dothelokimotion]

[ His lips curls in slight derision. A community. Is that what they are? All Loki can see are people accepting of their circumstances, sheep-like. No wonder Thor continues to chafe here. ]

I see. A noble reason.

[watermarks]

[The word 'noble' sounds like an insult, and Katara frowns, though not entirely due to feeling insulted as much as she felt the word didn't fit. Growing up in the south pole, community was everything, community was survival - the worst crimes were punished by being cast out of the community; the harsh climate would take care of the rest.

And so, like most things, she just can't let it go.]

I'm not sure that's the right word. I just know from experience that it's better to address something like this than to bury it.

[...if you have that option. Sometimes you don't. Sometimes you have to close in on yourself and move beyond the wound and do what needs to be done, but if you survive that, then the wound festers. She knows that from experience too.]

[dothelokimotion]

[ If only Loki subscribed to anything that vaguely helped emotional health. As it stands, he finds it easier to mock because he has little to no experience in it. Asgard was many things, but Loki is hardly going to call it a community. ]

It is a foregone conclusion though. Especially for these people. What is it you wish to address? Does it come from them or yourself?

her thought process here was fascinating to me, thank you for asking this question

[watermarks]

[Katara's expression turns inward, more thoughtful. Though the questions are provoking and she's tempted to just tell him it's none of his business, she also remembers the way Loki was in the bunker. She remembers her as yet unfinished conversation with Thor. So she tries to give him an honest answer; she's not... introspective by nature, so explaining her instinctive responses to things takes thought.]

What I wish to address isn't mutually exclusive to me or to the dead - or to the community. It's - not such a simple thing. I want to do something that will honor the dead, because I think that it's appropriate, that remembering and giving honor where life was lost is just -- [gah, words, how to say this other than 'good'] -- important. But I also want to do it for myself, because seeing this was upsetting, and I've learned ignoring things like this can hurt more than the pain of dealing with them. And I want to give everyone a chance to heal whose been hurt because... [why not? it's the right thing to do? we all need to be as healthy as possible to survive what's coming?] ...I feel that's important too.

It's all [as if coming to the realization herself while she's speaking, and she very much is:] part of the same thing. Healing through grieving is honoring life just like giving honor to the lost and remembering is part of honoring life.

<3

[dothelokimotion]

[ Loki only remembers a small part of his grief in a cage. Lashing out, tearing apart his own clothes. Ravaging his cell until every neat and tidy part had been wrecked. He cannot recall the sorrow, only the steady burn of anger that traced the lines of his vision. He thinks about the scar in his chest, black and ugly. He's healed from death, survived the worst of falls. But is that true healing? It gives him strength in a mocking sense, see how hard you tried?

But it wasn't other people who tried as much as Loki did, fighting himself on every corner. ]

I cannot say much on honour. I have scant little and it has never done me any favors. But perhaps there is some parallel involved.

[ Maybe. Loki doesn't want to be healed. Better, maybe. But on his own terms. He's tired of trying to be someone he's not. ]

[watermarks]

[It doesn't occur to her until Loki speaks that she is discussing honor, and she can't help but think of Zuko. She smiles softly for a moment, but knows that a person's personal honor and giving honor to life are two separate things.

She just... doesn't know how to explain that. So... maybe he'll see what she means if she asks instead?]

Do you think that having personal honor and giving honor to someone else - remembering life - are the same thing, from the same source?

[dothelokimotion]

Are they not?

Who would want honour from — [ a monster ] — a vagabond or strangers drifting through the night?

[watermarks]

[She just stares at him for a moment, trying to wrap her mind around what he's saying.

She suppose... it makes sense... kind of.]

Well, people sure wouldn't want disrespect from a vagabond or strangers passing through the night. And why should their response matter, anyway? [On a very practical level, Katara is certain that the dead don't care one way or another. On the other hand, she is no longer at all certain that's what they're talking about.] It's the act that matters. It's nice if the honor is received - it feels better that way, that's for sure, and it shows a mutual respect that way - but that's not the important part. The important part is giving it. And anyone can do that. Even enemies can do that.

[dothelokimotion]

[ Personally, Loki doesn't think much of honour. And he thinks of it even less now. Base sentimentality, that's all it was. So his reply is laconic. ]

I suppose.

[watermarks]

[ That's a pretty unenthusiastic response for something that he's been questioning her pretty closely about.

Like everything else, ever, she can't just let it go. ]

Do you?

[dothelokimotion]

[ He raises an eyebrow. ]

Did I not say so? I should not need repeat myself. It has meaning for you. Is that not enough?

[watermarks]

It does have meaning for me. [And if the tone of the conversation, of the general planet, were any less serious, there was a self-depreciating, wry little joke in there just waiting to happen. Alas.] But I knew that already. What do you think?

[Because that's how discussions work, see. Side A shares an opinion, and if that opinion gets challenged/clarified by Side B, and then Side A further clarifies, Side B then reflects on if his opinion has changed or not as a result of Side A.

...and honestly, Katara is not sure if Loki knows that this is how discussions are supposed to work, or if he is just dissembling.]

[dothelokimotion]

I rather keep that to myself.

[ He's not in the mood to rag on it, surprisingly. Maybe he's just feeling a little left out. Certain matters of the heart leave him feeling askew, confused. ]

[watermarks]

[...that is not really how discussions work, Loki.

But talking about honor is really more other people's forte. She's more interested in the fact that he'd have this whole conversation and then not... express an opinion.] ...alright.

...

I mean, that's strange, but alright.

And she almost says that, too. It's just... she's not sure if she wants to ask him why he doesn't want to. She thinks it's because he's not sure. She's equally certain he's not going to admit that, and she doesn't want to call him out on questioning his beliefs -- really, she's glad he's willing to question them.]

[dothelokimotion]

[ This is assuming Loki particularly cares. Sometimes he'll just let others weigh in, using their opinions against themselves or saving it for another day. ]

Is that so surprising?

[watermarks]

Yes and no. [Shrug.] You did just ask a lot of questions for someone who doesn't want to share an opinion.

[dothelokimotion]

I'm curious. That doesn't make me a sharer.

[watermarks]

[ ... any urge Katara has to probe further vanishes.

She sniffles a laugh.

She doesn't do it very well. So she tries to turn it into a cough, covering up her mouth. ]

[dothelokimotion]

What.

[watermarks]

It's nothing.

[ 'A sharer.' Pffft - she does, at least, manage to not laugh again. It would be hard for her to even explain just why it was so funny - it was just so incongruous. And it reminded her of a child. ]

[dothelokimotion]

[ His brow creases, but Loki lets it go. ]

Fine.

[watermarks]

[ Probably for the best.

She gives him a quick smile. ]

I'll be in touch about the bunker. Thank you again for your offer.