driftfleet | action and video.

Entry tags:

action and video.

Who: Thor + you
Broadcast: yes, video
Action: First Breath and Blue Fish
When: January 3rd - 4th

closed to Natasha.

[It takes some time for Thor to calm down enough from the shock of his memories to even think about what to do next. He had effectively chosen one thing of importance - Loki - and firmly shoved everything else to the side for hours. To take stock of the rest of it, look his own glaring mistakes in the face, was too much for him at the outset. But Thor isn't selfish at heart. There's only so long he can take focusing on himself before his mind turns to others.

He has to review what he knows from those last shattering moments on Earth with a grim objectivity before he gets in touch with the others. Once he does, it's easy enough to put together some of the pieces from his conversations with Natasha and know she's the one to call.

Not call exactly, but text.]

Can you meet me in the Space Bar?

[He briefly considers saying something else, bracing her for what he wants. There's no way he can think of to put that into text, though, so he doesn't. Once it's sent, he heads over to the Iskaulit to wait.]

action - first breath.

[Thor hadn't exactly been subtle when he came hurtling through the First Breath the night before, running straight through the ship in full battle armor before shutting himself in Loki's room. And that's where he stayed for a long time.

He does eventually come out though, rubbing tiredly at his face and heading into the kitchen. Thor's been here enough times to know where everything is. After a few moments of staring blankly at the countertops and cupboards, unreality threatening to unmoor him, he shakes himself and smacks the coffee pot onto the stove.

He'll be there for a while, drinking coffee at the bench and gazing vaguely at some fixed point on the wall. Still in full cape and mail sleeves. The bone-deep exhaustion in his face might have something to do with it.]

action - blue fish.

[Thor returns to his own ship during the day, knowing abstractly that the Fleet is due to depart this world soon. In the past he would prepare for this, restocking the food supplies and ensuring everything in the armory was locked back into place and accounted for. That was when the ship had more crew, and he hadn't yet become captain. Still, it needed to be done. Regardless of how unworthy he feels when he enters his own bedroom and sees the captain's bed in there.

Thor can be found stacking up crates in the cargo bay, checking through the fridges and freezers, and doing systems checks. Later on, he opts to sit on the top of the ship, watching the snow fall in silence.]

video.

[It's not the sudden reappearance of the short, jagged hair Thor used to sport or the incongruous brown eye where his eyepatch usually is that most dominates Thor's face when the video switches on. It's the weariness etched in hard lines all over him. There's no mistaking it, regardless of his otherwise composed demeanour. He merely nods at the camera before he starts, gruffer than usual.]

For those who knew her, Riona Cousland Theirin has left the Fleet. She was here for over three years, so I know she will be missed by many of us.

[There's a pause as though he might say more, but decides against it.]

The captaincy of the Blue Fish has fallen to me in her place. If you have any questions about that, you can bring them to me. [Thor shuts his eyes briefly, shaking his head.] Or... anything else.

[No doubt there might be some. He switches off the feed.]

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On my way.

[She's not on the Iskaulit, but she doesn't have to drop much before he heads over; it's only minutes before she arrives, scanning the bar for Thor.

He concern is reserved but clear on her expression.]

[It doesn't take long to find him, the bar mostly deserted. Thor himself was sitting at the bar with his back to the entrance when he hears Natasha walk in. He's quick to turn and slide off the bar stool, and-- the change in him is obvious, much like it was last time. His hair has, for lack of a better term, reset to short and ragged. He has two eyes instead of one, though they don't match.

And it's the tiredness in his face that's most striking, even though he smiles faintly when he sees Natasha.]

I thought we should probably catch up.

[That's a pretty weak joke, but what else can you do in this kind of situation? Take some kind of control.]

[Natasha recognizes that look and understands clearly and all at once why Thor messaged her. She matches his expression, smile slight and strained, sympathetic.]

Yeah. Maybe we should. [She sits.] Can I buy you a drink?

[He returns to his seat next to her, letting out a huff.]

I suppose so. It can't hurt.

[Not at this stage. A patch of silence follows before he speaks again.]

Have you been the only one who knew? This whole time?

[It's not like standard liquor will do much for Thor, anyway. But it would give him something to do with his hands, and maybe provide a little normalcy.

She doesn't meet his eyes directly as she answers.]

As far as I know, I'm the only one who's remembered it. I told Barnes before he left.

[At least a day removed from it all he can actually agree to it. If she'd caught him yesterday he doubts he would have accepted anything.

Thor can only nod, brow creasing at the mention of Barnes. He hadn't known the man in their own world at all, hadn't even known who he was looking at when he saw Barnes turn to dust. But Thor had spoken to him in the Fleet. And he knows what he was to Natasha here as well.

No wonder she hadn't said anything.]

Right. [What does one even say to that? Telling someone you saw them die in the end of life as they knew it?] It's a lot to keep to yourself.

It was the right thing to do. [She still believes it, too.] It's too much to put on people who don't remember it yet. Especially when there's nothing we can do about it.

I didn't want you to worry.

I know.

[Even as he had wondered why Natasha hadn't told him, he knew the answer. It's the same reluctance he finds in himself when he thinks about seeing Vision or Wanda (and he has checked, now, that they're still listed in the Fleet. breathed a sigh of guilty relief.) It's not fair to her, but he would never argue with the reasoning behind it.]

...are you all right?

[It's almost absurd to ask, he knows. It's been months for her and there's no good answer to the question. Still.]

[Her smile is sad at that. She doesn't want to lie to him. How can either of them be all right? And there's nothing they can do about it.

She touches the back of his hand gently instead.]

How are you?

[It was less than a day ago that he was telling the Rabbit that he was good to go, that his loss was merely motivating. He had believed it, even when it had been a paper-thin veneer to keep himself from plunging into an abyss.

Now? He takes a long breath and shakes his head.]

Well, I've been better. I woke up here yesterday.

[She sympathizes. She understands to why he reacts as he has. They've all lost so much; Thor, even more than most.]

I'm sorry.

[His gaze drifts away for a moment, at a loss. There's rarely been a time in his life when Thor didn't know what to do next. He was a man of action, of purpose. Even when thrown to the ground he would get back up again and keep trying. Here, now, brought back to the Fleet in the aftermath of Wakanda, it's hard to know what the next step should be. He had spent much of his time here planning what to do when the Asgardians finally reached Earth. He could no more continue doing that than he could continue pursuing Thanos.

Taking up the beer the bartender had set down in front of him, he finally shakes his head.]

I've told Loki some of it. He remembers-- [A falter before he continues.] as far as the attack on our ship.

[And his own death, he adds to himself, not willing to speak of it yet. With a frown, he looks back to Natasha.]

How much did Banner tell you when he reached Earth?

Some. He told us about Thanos. Told us he was coming, that he wanted to wipe out half of all life. He told us that he was responsible for Loki attacking earth in the first place.

[She doesn't get too much into the details. Thor knows. They both know.

Her brows pull together at the mention of Loki, unsure how to feel. She'll never think of him as on their side, but in the Fleet he hasn't been an enemy.]

He told us as much as he knew.

[Thor knew that Bruce must have gotten some of the information to them, to have met them all in one place when he finally made it to Earth himself. They wouldn't have organised an army without it. Still, it's good to know.]

I thought he would, yeah.

[It made a difference, even if not quite enough.]

He gave us time to have a chance. [Not his fault that they failed. She's not sure it's any of their fault. But here they are: they couldn't stop it.]

Edited 2019-01-06 04:19 (UTC)

That was what I had hoped for.

[Something in his expression falters for a moment, recalling his eyes meeting Heimdall's and their coming to that decision. The last act Heimdall ever made, only because Thor asked it of him. He heaves a sigh, drinking from his glass.]

Was Stark there? I don't remember seeing him.

[At first he thought the Hulkbuster was him, only he had seen Bruce in the armor at the end. An abstract observation that he's only now putting together.]

No. [Apparently there's still a little catching up to do, isn't there? There hadn't been time to bring Thor completely up to speed during the fight.] There was an attack on New York. Thanos's men.

That was the last anyone saw or heard from Tony. The ship left, him on board. Both him and the Time Stone.

[Bruce had been able to bring them up to speed on that.]

He was on one of Thanos's ships?

[That was worse than Thor had thought. With the benefit of his Fleet memories he knows Tony had been estranged from a lot of the Avengers, but surely it hadn't mattered when something as big as this was descending on them.

It sinks in that there's no way of knowing if Tony survived. Thanos already had the Time Stone when he reached Earth. The odds... are low.]

I don't know where those ships would have gone. Thanos had a command ship they must have come from, but where the smaller ones would go otherwise...

[If Thor knew, he could go looking for Tony. With Stormbreaker he could travel between planets. Only, he needs to know where he's going.

Him and the wizard. Thanos's henchman showed up looking for him, then for Vision.

[Natasha shakes her head. She wishes she knew Tony's status, but she doesn't. She can't say. They haven't always been the closest members of the team, but they are a team.

And she thinks there's a certain understanding there. At least there used to be.]

Not sure what the best case scenario is here.

[Thor's silent for a long few moments. The best case scenario ... even the most positive of outcomes is dire. If Tony had survived the encounter with Thanos and then survived the Infinity Stones, it still left him stranded somewhere in space. Humans typically aren't prepared for that kind of situation, not in the long term. Tony was one of the most ingenious people Thor's ever met, but he doesn't know if the man can find his way back to Earth from wherever he is.

If he still lives.

He stirs himself and shakes his head, turning his mind from those pessimistic thoughts.]

If he's out there, he'll find a way to let us know. He's probably building something as we speak.

We'll cross that road when we come to it. But if anyone could find a way...

[Far be it from Natasha to ever dismiss Stark.

But he faced Thanos, and he lost too. She doesn't like what that means, not for Tony.]

Even if just to tell us he told us so.

Edited 2019-01-12 05:49 (UTC)

He does enjoy that.

[Even if it doesn't happen often. Thor holds out hope that Tony is still out there. He has to, if he wants to think that Valkyrie and his own people have survived at all.]

Vision and Wanda - they don't know either, do they?

No, they don't [And maybe she should feel bad about that, but even if she hadn't intended to hide it from everyone, she wouldn't have been able to tell one of them and not the other, and telling both of them had seemed cruel.] Vision knows I'm hiding something, but he's allowing me not to get into the details.

He's so happy about him and Wanda, I think he doesn't mind staying in the dark.

[Him and Wanda...? Oh. Realisation dawns on Thor's face, only to be followed just as fast by a twist of unhappiness. No wonder Natasha hasn't said anything. This is more of a minefield than he had first thought.

And isn't that just fitting. The Atroma saddling some of them with horrible knowledge that they can't, or won't, give to the others. No doubt that's the point.]

I suppose if he's making the choice not to know, it's better than the alternative.

More like he trusted me to tell him if it was important.

[She'll own it. She doesn't want to pass the blame on, and it was her choice.]

It wasn't going to make them any happier, either.

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