driftfleet | action and video.

Entry tags:

action and video.

Who: Thor + you
Broadcast: yes, video
Action: First Breath and Blue Fish
When: January 3rd - 4th

closed to Natasha.

[It takes some time for Thor to calm down enough from the shock of his memories to even think about what to do next. He had effectively chosen one thing of importance - Loki - and firmly shoved everything else to the side for hours. To take stock of the rest of it, look his own glaring mistakes in the face, was too much for him at the outset. But Thor isn't selfish at heart. There's only so long he can take focusing on himself before his mind turns to others.

He has to review what he knows from those last shattering moments on Earth with a grim objectivity before he gets in touch with the others. Once he does, it's easy enough to put together some of the pieces from his conversations with Natasha and know she's the one to call.

Not call exactly, but text.]

Can you meet me in the Space Bar?

[He briefly considers saying something else, bracing her for what he wants. There's no way he can think of to put that into text, though, so he doesn't. Once it's sent, he heads over to the Iskaulit to wait.]

action - first breath.

[Thor hadn't exactly been subtle when he came hurtling through the First Breath the night before, running straight through the ship in full battle armor before shutting himself in Loki's room. And that's where he stayed for a long time.

He does eventually come out though, rubbing tiredly at his face and heading into the kitchen. Thor's been here enough times to know where everything is. After a few moments of staring blankly at the countertops and cupboards, unreality threatening to unmoor him, he shakes himself and smacks the coffee pot onto the stove.

He'll be there for a while, drinking coffee at the bench and gazing vaguely at some fixed point on the wall. Still in full cape and mail sleeves. The bone-deep exhaustion in his face might have something to do with it.]

action - blue fish.

[Thor returns to his own ship during the day, knowing abstractly that the Fleet is due to depart this world soon. In the past he would prepare for this, restocking the food supplies and ensuring everything in the armory was locked back into place and accounted for. That was when the ship had more crew, and he hadn't yet become captain. Still, it needed to be done. Regardless of how unworthy he feels when he enters his own bedroom and sees the captain's bed in there.

Thor can be found stacking up crates in the cargo bay, checking through the fridges and freezers, and doing systems checks. Later on, he opts to sit on the top of the ship, watching the snow fall in silence.]

video.

[It's not the sudden reappearance of the short, jagged hair Thor used to sport or the incongruous brown eye where his eyepatch usually is that most dominates Thor's face when the video switches on. It's the weariness etched in hard lines all over him. There's no mistaking it, regardless of his otherwise composed demeanour. He merely nods at the camera before he starts, gruffer than usual.]

For those who knew her, Riona Cousland Theirin has left the Fleet. She was here for over three years, so I know she will be missed by many of us.

[There's a pause as though he might say more, but decides against it.]

The captaincy of the Blue Fish has fallen to me in her place. If you have any questions about that, you can bring them to me. [Thor shuts his eyes briefly, shaking his head.] Or... anything else.

[No doubt there might be some. He switches off the feed.]

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

[Thor snorts weakly, straightening up again and letting Kova go about his business.]

It's hard to find those, but I take your meaning.

[The cat finally seems satisfied by the attention earned from Thor, and gives a low meow in his direction before scampering over to his dish at last. And allowing Haggar to finally stoop to pet him.]

He is the sort of person who appreciates when one... makes an effort that they might ordinarily find difficult.

Yeah. We have... we've been doing well lately.

[Then this happened, and blew it all to pieces. Thor's hands ball into fists on his knees before he forcibly turns himself back around to the table, grabbing his coffee mug for something to do.]

I am doing my best regardless.

[She watches him, this restlessness, frowning thoughtfully. She does not know enough to pry and yet she finds it disturbs her despite him being a stranger.

The twins fault again, no doubt.]

The burden upon you seems... great. You may be doing your best under the circumstances, but your stress will only increase if you keep at it the way you are.

What else can I do?

[It's a genuine question, though a bit rhetorical. He speaks to the table rather than to Haggar.]

I cannot fix what has happened at home, especially not while I am here.

No... you can not do that.

[She's still petting the cat, but she pauses in her own tenseness. The consideration of going back, of time slipping forward, while losing what she has found here. She does not like that. It makes her uneasy, when it happens to others.]

But... you have here, for whatever it may be.

[Silence falls for a long while as that sinks in. Yes, here. The Fleet. A mess of captivity, idle hours and friendships he would have never made otherwise. His feelings on the Fleet used to be so simple. Now they can't be - now the Fleet has Loki whereas his own universe doesn't.]

I hated this place. I still do. I do not hate those trapped here or the time I've spent with them but it is still a prison keeping us from our homes. But-- [He stops, raking his fingers through his hair, shoulders tense.] --now it's done this.

[Brought Loki back.]

A prison it may be, but it is yet a reprieve from your... circumstances.

[Because they could not yet control the circumstances that brought them here, a power that could displace even gods from their own times.]

You are still here... together.

Yeah.

[It's quiet. Thor doesn't know yet how he feels about it all, how he'll cope with knowing this could end at any moment. But he can't deny the relief he feels to have Loki back in any form.]

And that is not nothing.

... It is not.

[She agrees softly, resuming her careful petting of the cat.]

How that affects your priorities here... is your choice.

[His mouth twists a bit, remembering what he had previously spent time doing here. Preparing for Asgard's arrival on Earth.]

My priorities will already have to change. I cannot continue the way I was before.

Having that as a realization is... a start.

[She half glances up at him again, studying his expression.]

[Remorse is written there, etched into his skin. At this point he's fiddling with the mug again for something to do with his hands. He does need to change his actions here, if only because he can no longer work for a goal that isn't achievable in the near future.

It occurs to him he'll need to clear out his office. At least that's one task he can do easily enough.]

A start... yes. I just do not know to what end.

... you need not make all these decisions at once.

[She's quiet for a long moment. It's an odd conversation. But she knows all too well the struggles with having a deeply rooted mindset.]

If you are too focused on an end... you lose out on the beginning.

[That seems to jerk him out of his thoughts more, sitting up straight and staring at Haggar. It's startling because - it hits home. His mad rush to kill Thanos had been bungled at the crucial point when Thor was too focused on what he wanted out of it. Not what he was doing. It had been a costly mistake, one he's still too ashamed of to mention.]

I... I don't know. Perhaps you are right.

... Perhaps.

[She can tell that something in her words had resonated with him, by the sudden intensity of his gaze.

Though she had been on that side of it. Having someone else's words make a difference in the most unlikely of times and circumstance, and feeling strangely made helpless by it all.]

It is a lot to consider. You have much to come to terms with, one way or another.

[Even if he has not clarified, it's written all over his face.]

Mm. [He's quiet for a while longer before he nods, something clearing in his expression.] Thank you.

[Earnestly. Thor doesn't know what the answer is, but in prompting that kind of question for him Haggar has opened things up just a little from the suffocating mess they had become.]

[She was still not used to being thanked, let alone be strangers.

She makes a soft amused sound, before giving a small nod, and then glancing back down to her cat.]

At least you may wish to find something mundane to occupy your time with. It does not make the burden any less, but it may... ease the sting of it.

[Not that it's ever fully worked for her, but she has had people actively nudging her away from such self-destructiveness. It makes such a difference.]

I aim to do so. I am the Blue Fish's captain, and I don't intend to ignore my responsibilities there. There is always much to do.

[A lot of it is of Thor's own making and not required, true. But even before this terrible time descended on him he was loath to waste his time idling around. Thor needs to be occupied, productive. He'll drive himself to distraction otherwise.]

It seems as though you take that responsibility as strongly as he does.

[Not that it was surprising. Though perhaps he too, was less likely to want to delegate.]

[It's always a little surprising to hear that kind of comment about Loki, but heartening all the same.]

Apparently so. Though I hope Loki doesn't push himself with it for a while.