brooklyn_boy: (Default)
brooklyn_boy ([personal profile] brooklyn_boy) wrote in [community profile] driftfleet2019-03-05 10:01 pm

Action | Who needs a gosh dang drink??

Who: Steve and everyone else who just needs to get drunk. One closed to existing CR
Broadcast: No
Action: The Iskaulit/Space Bar
When: Post Calibrations/Bombing the eff out of Marsiva


[OPEN]

Tony would probably be proud of Steve, if he were able to see him right now. He'd slap his back and welcome him back to the world of inebriation while ordering shots for everyone in the bar to commemorate the day. As it is, though, Tony isn't here and, without him, there's not a damn person who would feel proud in this entire bar. That's part of it's charm.

Steve sighs and swallows his fourth drink. It's strong and alien and somehow enough to give him a strong buzz but not enough to really get him drunk. Not yet, at least. But he's not a quitter, so bottom's up! He hisses a little at the burn of it and feels, not for the first time, like he was being a coward. He saw some stuff in those rooms, sure. But other people had it so much worse. Saw so much more. He should really be thankful, actually.

But he's not. And this is a 30's approved way of getting over trauma. There were worse ways of coping, he was sure. So for now he's just going to stay in his seat and keep ordering drinks until that elusive drunken state hits him once more.

Should only take another hour or three.


[CLOSED TO EXISTING CR]

No one could blame Steve for starting. He'd messaged his friends about fifteen minutes ago, telling them to meet him at the bar for some drinks. But just sitting here, waiting? It was done better with a drink in hand to look social, at least. And it's not like that one is going to be his last. No, after Calibrations he can imagine himself coming over here quite often. He can imagine all of them coming here quite often, in fact. But maybe tonight (today? Space was hard to judge) would help take some of the sting off. Or at least some of the awkwardness. 

But it wasn't as though they <i>chose</i> to share all of that. Loki, Steve is sure, would have preferred to keep his death to himself. And Thor? I am sure half of those memories were things he'd rather not have replayed over and over again. And <i>Hux</i>. God... That was just what Steve knew of. Who knew what other people had put his friends through? What they'd been through themselves? 

Steve preemptively orders another drink for whoever shows up first. Whoever it was, he's sure they won't say no. Not now. 

First round is on him.
stillgotmyleftarm: (half smile)

[personal profile] stillgotmyleftarm 2019-03-12 02:39 am (UTC)(link)
[Bucky lets out a breath that's maybe a little shakier than he means, but his eyes go to Steve and his lips twitch up into this look that's... well, honestly, it's a little hard to read, because it's really a little hard for Bucky to figure out what he's feeling. Relief, respect, that bone-deep need to both smack Steve upside the head and stand between him and anything that would try to tear him down.

A box set. We protect each other. We're in it together. He'd wanted nothing more than to hear Steve say words like those again, since the day he'd died and Bucky had known he'd never hear them again. But now here he is, hearing them, and even with the cold churning feeling in his gut, when he thinks of just how badly he's failed his Steve... Steve, who is also his Steve, so much his Steve, is sitting here and telling him exactly what he needs to hear.]


You punk, [he says, and if his voice sounds a little strangled, Steve doesn't have to know it's because his throat feels tight and thick. At least it comes out a little stronger, a second later.] You're a fuckin' idiot, but I guess I must be, too.

And I think I'm at least a little drunk now, thank God, [he adds, with a laugh.] Because what you're saying almost, almost makes sense.

Although you do know I'm not gonna stop trying to keep you from doing shit that's too stupid, right? That's how this works.

[And Bucky has maybe wondered if Steve just... didn't feel he needed Bucky, anymore, once he'd gotten the serum. If Bucky had just become unnecessary. Extraneous. But he'd made sure, instead, to be indispensable. And he doesn't plan on stopping anytime soon, here and now.]
stillgotmyleftarm: (neutral good)

[personal profile] stillgotmyleftarm 2019-03-12 03:15 am (UTC)(link)
You do make bad decisions - and I was just tryin' to think like you, [Bucky points out, definitely aware that he hasn't felt this way, either, in a long time... and definitely hadn't, when he'd woken up kidnapped on some strange ship.

Well. If there's one thing he's learned, it's that life is never, ever what he expects it's going to be.]


I think we're both fucked, [he points out, and his answering grin is a little muzzy, too; he's still got a little liquid left in his bottle, but he also gets drunk a little faster than Steve. He's definitely starting to feel warm and floaty, though the big, warm hand on his leg is grounding. Good. Even if he doesn't need help staying on his stool, thanks.]

Yeah, but that's why we're here, right? I'm still impressed you can get drunk. Never thought I'd miss seeing it, but I kinda did. You always did need to learn to loosen up a little more than you could sober.

[Bucky, feeling magnanimous, pushes the rest of what little is left in his bottle toward Steve.]
stillgotmyleftarm: (smile 1)

[personal profile] stillgotmyleftarm 2019-03-12 04:06 am (UTC)(link)
Yeah, I guess it does. [And he'd think he shouldn't think too hard about that, but they're already on a goddamn spaceship, so it's really not as weird, in the end, as it could be.

He frowns a little in concentration when Steve asks the question, but... Well, yeah. Of course he remembers. At least,]
I remember right before we started drinking, and then the next morning, [he points out, laughing a little.] But you were the bad influence on me. I was gonna stay in with you anyway, you thought you had to bribe me with hooch. I had to tell my ma it was something I ate.

[And Steve is still a bad influence - Bucky reaches for his bottle, to have a little of what Steve's having, soused or not.]
stillgotmyleftarm: (side)

[personal profile] stillgotmyleftarm 2019-03-12 02:20 pm (UTC)(link)

[Bucky scoffs.] Cards, at least. Come on, Steve. [Have another - sloppier - kick to the lower leg. He doesn't know what his Steve had been planning, but he knows that they had a good time nonetheless. And he hadn't missed the way Steve had been extra-prickly the entire week before; Bucky had maybe been on edge, too, because that fever had taken fucking forever to break. And every time Steve got knocked down by some bug... well, Bucky never slept right until he seemed on the mend. He'd been so antsy that his birthday had just seemed like no big deal, in comparison.] Honestly, your damn fever breaking was all I needed. That was a bad one.

[He does blow out a breath that's a little bit of a laugh, too.] She knew. I think she also knew that hangover was gonna punish me more than she ever could. [He eyes Steve.] Pretty sure your ma knew, too, pal.

[Although speaking of hangovers; Bucky reaches out and swirls what's left in the bottle, when Steve sets it down.] 'Least the serum means we get over 'em faster. [He can't drink like this and not expect one, but at least it will be abbreviated.

Then, maybe a little bolder (thanks, super-buzz), he turns to Steve and asks, seriously,] S'this all you spend your money on?

stillgotmyleftarm: (tilted)

[personal profile] stillgotmyleftarm 2019-03-12 04:23 pm (UTC)(link)

Callin' you a punk, punk, [Bucky says, bumping the outside of his foot against Steve's. But his face stays serious, because,] Can't do that back home, and I'm guessing you don't spend your days in a bar there.

[Look. There is nothing wrong with getting falling-down drunk every once in a while. Case in point: Bucky's week. He gets it. He does. But even if the serum will handle all of it,] You need a hobby, Rogers. What about that art?

[Because don't you give him that look, Steve. Be stubborn all you want. Bucky isn't about to let you drink every cent away, even if you don't need it here.]

stillgotmyleftarm: (smile 1)

[personal profile] stillgotmyleftarm 2019-03-12 04:57 pm (UTC)(link)

[Bucky doesn't startle when Steve's hand takes his, even if he's maybe a little quietly surprised at the intensity of the gesture. But that's Steve - intensity personified - and one corner of Bucky's mouth twitches, as he twists his hand around to grasp Steve back, thinking that whatever he needs, Bucky's happy to give him.

Of course he laughs a little because Steve, that is kind of pathetic, pal.] You putter around in the gym and think you're working out. And if you're painting him pictures, you really need to rethink some life choices.

[He knows Steve has said Loki isn't so bad. Bucky trusts Steve, of course, but he still maybe has some doubts.]

I guess you could, [He says, looking a little pleased. Bucky's always been proud of Steve's talent, and equally impressed by it. He's always thought Steve could really do something with it, even if he understands that it isn't what Steve wanted to do with his life. It's still frustrating, seeing those beautiful things bloom out of his hands, and Steve seeming to miss the whole point of it.

Then he grins, almost wickedly.] Need a model?

stillgotmyleftarm: (skeptical)

[personal profile] stillgotmyleftarm 2019-03-13 02:46 pm (UTC)(link)

[It's true; Bucky's callouses now are all gun callouses, along with the weirdly placed ones that come from handling the shield. And for Bucky's part, it's still a little strange: Steve's new hands, even if they fit him just as well as the rest of what the serum did to his body. His hands haven't changed so much - they used to seem a little oversized, and they were always cold. Now they're the right size, if stronger and the knuckles less knobbly, and they're always hot - one thing he'd definitely immediately noticed about the "new" Steve, aside from his sheer size. Steve ran hot after the serum, which made him the most popular foxhole buddy possible... and Bucky may have pulled rank as second-in-command to get Steve in his foxhole more often than not. Between the two of them (and the body heat Bucky's serum throws off), it had made their wartime digs almost cozy.

Steve starts talking, though, and it pulls Bucky out of his muddy thoughts - making him snort and bat at Steve's hand a little sluggishly (the alcohol is finally, finally really hitting his system, thank God) as he grabs at Bucky's shirt.] Excuse you, that's only for guys who buy me dinner first. [He must be drunk, because that almost sounds like he'd be willing to let a guy paw at him after a date, and that's definitely not something Bucky would normally consider. Or has ever considered.

Whatever. He's drunk, and there's something more important he wanted to say.]

And even if it was, people'd pay a hell of a lot for this anatomical study on their wall. I don't know how you got to be an artist when you clearly can't appreciate true beauty. What the hell would you paint?

stillgotmyleftarm: (Default)

[personal profile] stillgotmyleftarm 2019-03-13 05:57 pm (UTC)(link)

[If Bucky notices the pause, he seems to just count it as 'pulled one over on Steve' and looks all the more smug about it, before he squirms away (and does not fall off his stool, thanks very much) from the poke in the ribs.]

You don't know that. You also eat more than I do, if I remember correctly.

[Never mind that had been because Bucky had slipped rations and chocolate bars and stolen apples and whatever the hell else he could find into Steve's pack when he wasn't looking, during the war. Old habits die hard, and Bucky had learned from a young age how to sneak more onto Steve's plate without him noticing. Maybe turning him into a super-spy hadn't been that hard for HYDRA, after all.]

Trish O'Neal, [he murmurs, humming a little.] I guess maybe you do have an eye for nice things, after all. In some respects.

[He still kicks Steve again and steals his bottle for a drink.] You were always better at people than things. I mean, not that you're bad at still life, but anybody can draw flowers. Not everybody can draw a profile like you can. [It's a little more serious musing, but Bucky means it.] Besides. I've been on the cover of Time. Clearly I'll sell.

[Even if it had been for taking down the plane in Steve's absence. And again for apparently surviving it, seventy years later.]

stillgotmyleftarm: (half smile)

[personal profile] stillgotmyleftarm 2019-03-13 07:31 pm (UTC)(link)

Well, look - I know you were hoping your whole life to make it into Ladies' Home Journal, but... [Bucky trails off, smirking as he watches Steve's face flush, and not just from the alcohol - though he's got a bit of a healthy glow going on from that, too, and it's... familiar. It's nice. It just feeds back into that warm feeling the alcohol has kindled in his gut, and this time, his foot hooks itself around the rung of Steve's stool and pulls it closer, Steve and all.]

Yeah, well - those're real works of art, [he says, balancing one elbow on the bar and resting his chin in his hand. It is weird that Steve's sketchbooks are in museums - they are back home, too - and Bucky had only been able to bring himself to look at one for about five seconds before he'd started feeling sick. But here and now, with Steve alive and well and happily drunk in front of him... it doesn't seem so upsetting, anymore.] A real shame they've probably got 'em open to the cats for display.

[Then, a moment later - a little more serious,] You could just ask for 'em back, I bet.

[Bucky couldn't - they hadn't been his. But Steve could.]

stillgotmyleftarm: (bucky barnes)

[personal profile] stillgotmyleftarm 2019-03-14 02:06 am (UTC)(link)
[Bucky's quiet, maybe sensing that Steve's being serious, here and now. That he's being completely, unabashedly, unashamedly honest, in that way it seems like only Steve can be. The air between them feels thick and still, and the warm feeling in his gut stalls a little bit, as Steve speaks and Bucky truly, truly hears what he's saying.

Because they can't go back - not home. Not either of them. Bucky remembers what it was like, when that hit him. The idea that Steve had to feel that, too... it's like a punch to the gut, and it makes him sad and angry and so many other things, all at once. It was a horrible, horrible feeling, that aloneness.

And it's something he hasn't felt since he appeared here and ran into Steve. Since he found his best friend again - even before his Steve appeared, insisting he was anything but Bucky's best friend, tearing open a hole in his gut that he knows he's desperately trying to stuff this Steve inside... and the best and worst part of it is, it's kind of working.

He blows out a breath, the buzz faded to the background suddenly, the reality of Steve here next to him, warm and solid and real, saying he might, y'know, want to stick around for a bit.

Bucky isn't sure how he doesn't choke on his next breath, his throat feels so tight, as he watches Steve silently for a moment, letting out a breath he hadn't realized he was holding until his lungs start to ache from it.]


I guess if you're gonna stick around... I'd better plan to do the same, [he says, quietly.] I mean. Who the hell else is gonna keep your ass out of trouble? Natasha?
stillgotmyleftarm: (quietly)

[personal profile] stillgotmyleftarm 2019-03-14 03:01 pm (UTC)(link)

[The fact of the matter is, Bucky had said he'd follow Steve, and that promise hasn't changed. It won't change. Steve needs someone to watch his six, and Bucky's gotten pretty damned good at it. The fact that there are two Steves here now, trapped, in need of some watching really only reinforces the need to stay - which simply crystalizes into a real, tangible plan when Steve, here and now, says he's going to stick it out. Bucky doesn't know what good he can do here, but whatever it is... he's going to do it.]

Maybe she will, [he muses with a quirk of a smile, in a tone of voice that says he's not surprised, and maybe even pleasantly so.] I guess we'll just have to see. I'm sure one of us'll end up keeping score.

[But the rest of what Steve says drops the smile mostly off his face. He lets out a breath that isn't quite a sigh, but is pretty close, watching his friend with an expression that's definitely serious and sad underneath.] I know, [he says, softly, because - he does. Steve Rogers kind of has some of the shittiest luck... and yet at the same time, some people might argue that his luck is ridiculously good. He's survived, after all - both of him - and he's still here, but while maybe that is lucky, it feels like the price he's been made to pay along the way is unreasonably high.

Some days, some really bad days, Bucky will let himself think about his own luck... and it kind of balances out to the same, when he's being honest for five whole seconds.

He reaches out, hand falling on Steve's shoulder and staying there.] If there's one thing I've learned about you, it's that something being dumb or dangerous doesn't stop you from doing it.

[What he's saying - what he's trying to say - is that yeah. Hope is dangerous. But it's the most precious thing a guy can have. And Steve shouldn't - can't - give that up.] Let 'em hear. [He glances up, too.] We can't control it. Maybe we never will. But even when you were wearin' tights, pal, you didn't really do it for entertainment. [He'd done that for hope, too.]

stillgotmyleftarm: (quietly)

[personal profile] stillgotmyleftarm 2019-03-18 12:31 am (UTC)(link)
[Bucky hates and loves seeing Steve like this - seeing Steve letting someone see the cracks, because it both means he can't handle shit on his own (which, of course he can't, nobody can) and because he trusts Bucky enough to let him see, if however briefly. It hasn't happened often. And while Bucky hates the way it makes him feel every time, some small part of him is honored when Steve opens up that small part of himself, to let Bucky in. He knows it's fucking hard, and he knows what it means, when he gets that glimpse.

He knows it also means he will do anything he can to help. It's not a question. It's a foregone conclusion, and it has been ever since the day he met Steve.

But this time, what he sees in Steve - the bad, and the good - feels like it's simply a mirror image of what he's feeling, himself: the way it's so easy to fall back into this friendship, despite the fact that they, technically, were never friends - and the way that doesn't matter. The way they've found each other, in the face of what happened to their own best friends.

It's so fucking complicated, and yet so simple.]


Too bad that backfired on you, [is all he says, for a moment, just watching Steve's face. Holding his eyes with his own. Letting Steve know that Bucky can see, that Bucky understands, and that he doesn't have any solution other than the one that Steve's found. And he's willing to back that up, with everything he has.

Steve's diversion definitely isn't graceful, but Bucky's willing to give it to him. Otherwise they're going to have to get even drunker, and he's not too drunk yet to realize that.]


I dunno, [he says, looking thoughtful.] Does it mean I get a bigger cake?

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