4. [video]

[pompous_today]

Who: Simon Tam and you
Broadcast: Fleetwide
Action: Anywhere
When: July 7th

[Simon has an expression of mild disgust on his face as he turns the camera on, examining a bottle of soda.]

Has anybody else gotten some personalized cola bottles from the sponsors? I mean, they are clearly meant for me, but my name is misspelled on a few of them, and then... there's this one.

[Simon turns it toward the camera: it has the infamous "you tried" star... with Simon's face on it.]

I got a gold star for... what? Dissecting sentient creatures? Playing my part like a good television star? Being myself? Did I fail at whatever I tried to do?

[[OOC NOTE: This was just a fun idea I had- in the vein of Share A Coke bottles, the sponsors have decided to gift Fleet members with their own personalized bottles of soda. Except their names won't necessarily be spelled correctly, or the soda will have weird flavors, or be loaded with caffiene- be creative!]]

Comments

[poetontheinside]

Mine says Stanley.

[Ironically, probably the only name they got right. And he seems pretty pissed off about it.]

[pompous_today]

Is... that wrong?

[poetontheinside]

You think I like going by 'Stanley Kowalski'? [Wait 'til you hear what his ex-wife as named.]

It's only morally wrong that my mom let my dad name me that.

[pompous_today]

[Simon grimaces a little.]

Okay, I can see being annoyed in that case. I'm guessing the sponsors knew that and gave you that bottle on purpose.

[poetontheinside]

'A streetcar named disappointment of the year'. [Grumpy.]

[pompous_today]

Well, that's even ruder. Did they think it would make you laugh?

[poetontheinside]

...They didn't actually name me that.

[pompous_today]

I see. Who did?

[poetontheinside]

No one, it was a joke--

You Canadian or something?

[pompous_today]

I am not even from Earth, actually. Still a human being, but I am from centuries ahead of most people I have spoken to.

[poetontheinside]

Oh! Like Bev? You live in space, too? [At least Bev had had a sense of humor, so it's not a future-thing, just a this-guy-thing.]

[pompous_today]

Ah- yes, in a manner of speaking! I am glad you have some sort of context for it- it's surprisingly hard for me to explain living in space to someone who doesn't so much as know what "space" is.

The short version is that humanity abandoned Earth centuries ago and went looking for greener pastures. We found and terraformed other planets- that is, made them habitable for human life- and spread out from there. It happened a long time before I was born, however.

[poetontheinside]

Be kinda dumb if I still didn't know, right? [Since that is... literally where they are right now, it's a little hard to ignore.]

Think Wrath has somethin' like that going on, too. You know, the 'old earth' thing?

[pompous_today]

That's a good point. [Simon grinned sheepishly.]

I would imagine it is true for several of us- at some point, Earth will no longer be able to sustain humans, after all. At least that is how it was in my world. There were too many people, not enough land and food and resources to go around.

[poetontheinside]

Global warming, that kinda stuff?

It's a little messed up. Cause, uh, I'm from that earth, and I can't really do shit to stop something like that.