driftfleet | mingle post? mingle post. MINGLE POST!!

[ Well, the fact that he still has to ask at all what upset her says right there that he won't understand that portion of it, so she decides to relent a little and tell him the part that he at least has a small chance of understanding. ]

A few others I met in another place where people were brought to against their will, like this, are here. One of them-- He's disappeared. He was... well, extremely important to me. I loved him. He was part of my family, in the other place.

[ She quiets for a moment and swallows hard, turning her head away a bit in an effort to keep control of her emotions, even as her eyes sting with unshed tears thinking about Barakiel. ]

I suppose... it's my own fault... It's what I deserve. For leaving him in that other place, alone. I hurt him, so this is only fair.

But it's still devastating.

[to say he quietly considers what she has to say isn't very telling--he's always silently churning his way through things like this. it seems to be his default speed in conversation. still, his eyes aren't on her. he's considering anyway.

what did she say? 'we're all in this together?' he looks up, suddenly, when something rattles up in the vents--barely a noise, probably just one of those rodents.

he tracks the motion anyway, watching something he can't see scurry down the small passages above them.]

My friend is here. I left for a month. Says he's been gone for a year. He's taller now, thinner. Doesn't move like he used to. Smells wrong, cut his hair. New scars...

[a part of him seems to return to the present as he squints where the sounds stop.]

He went somewhere I can't follow, don't understand it. Bothers me.

[ Him? He has a friend? She's not sure she wants to imagine that. What must a person be like to be called a friend by Zhas? ]

That is common in places like that. It's been a year for me since I've seen... Barakiel and everyone else. For them, though, it was barely a few days.

I've... changed a lot since they last saw me.

[ She hesitates for a moment, then takes a few steps back towards him. ]

I would like to say that you get used to this sort of thing... but, ah... people like you and I cannot ever quite accept being so powerless. Isn't that right?

[that's the missing piece. 'you and I'. his attention finally makes it back down to their conversation, eyes glowing dimly. his expression is hard to read, even more so now that his face is smudged.]

You think my behavior is childish. You've known others who chosen a life away from normal people. You find me unnecessarily violent and distant, believe I am holding on to old ways that are no longer relevant.

[ Ahh... so he is able to step outside himself for a moment long enough to consider how others think and feel. She's a little impressed, but not sure it's going to get her anywhere with him. Or get him anywhere with anyone else. ]

Yes. I've known many people like you. I used to be you. And all of us killed or did worse to people who didn't deserve it because of the way we were. I don't know if you think you don't deserve a life of your own or perhaps you have simply told yourself for a very long time that you don't need anyone else because admitting to yourself that you wanted someone when you couldn't have anyone was too painful. But I know you aren't doing yourself any favors.

[ She hesitates again, lowering her gaze to the floor, just near her feet. She frowns deeply again, brow furrowing. She doesn't really want to tell him the rest, but... well, perhaps she owes him this much. ]

And there's something else... My memory has been tampered with here. You remind me much of someone I believe meant a lot to me, but I can't remember who this person was. There are just... holes and black, empty spaces in my memory in some places, and an unsettling, haunting feeling that I've forgotten something very important.

[wrong. he thinks that her entire analysis is wrong. his enemies deserve it. he has a life of his own. he knows who he wants, and he wants them to stay safe and well and happy more than he can even contain, sometimes.

but he sets his jaw and keeps quiet. he isn't going to argue her on this. she has more to say, and it's something that strikes a chord in that wound-up knot that's been growing in his chest. that is something he's compelled to speak about--a disgusting secret he's wanted to get out of his head since he realized it was there.]

Mine too. Parts of my master are gone, her face, her name... Something important...

[that is where his shame settles and it gets through his stony looks and the face paint for just a second--he glances away, at the floor, and grinds the palm of his hand into the side of his head, against his hair. safely away from his face.]

You kind of... look like her...

[ That admission grabs her attention by the horns and instantly she snaps her head up to look back at him again. Seeing his body language change so drastically, if even for a fleeting moment, completely shocks her. She laughs shortly in disbelief as he continues, floored by this revelation. ]

...I suppose I just have that sort of look to me. And, here, when I was a child, I used to think I was a freak for being the only person who looked like I did in my entire country...

[ She shakes her head bitterly and, in spite of herself, she walks back over to him and sits down on the floor next to him. She laughs again, but she's clearly not amused and there's no real mirth in the hollow sound at all. She's thinking about Damarhis and how he was attracted to her so much at first because she looked like his princess, the one he was in love with at home. ]

Needless to say, I am not her. Don't forget that.

I'm not sure if the memory-tampering is intentional on Atroma's part or an accidental side effect of the brain chips. Either way, I don't know how to fix it. I can't decide if I want it fixed.

[this again. he's got a strong urge to kick her, just like the first time, for sitting so close to his feet like that--but now that he understands her motivations better, he can at least figure she's doing it to appear friendly and non-confrontational, rather than intentionally submissive.

so he shifts his weight from one foot to the other, but never raises it. he looks down at her instead while he tries to decide how to say what's rattling around in his brain.]

Don't make assumptions about me. [then, awkwardly, almost like it only just occurred to him--] Please.

[ Another hollow little laugh, but at least this time when she looks over at him, there's a hint of a smile on her lips. ]

Then don't make them about me.

And I wouldn't have to fill in the blanks myself if you did it for me.

I don't like talking.

[that he can say easily, even if he frowns. the rest is troublesome and annoying and can be dissected later.]

I can tell that much. And I have to wonder why.

Why the face-paint. Why the dark heavy clothing that makes you look bigger than you are. Why the street fighting style. Why a Master...

What exactly are you fighting for at home.

I don't like explaining.

[he's starting to feel kind of sick. not physically--his body feels great--but this has already been a mental obstacle course he hasn't been expecting. she's not supposed to be interested in him, she's supposed to go, "god, what a freak," and then do her best to avoid him for the rest of her time here.]

And stop sitting there, it's annoying.

[ She takes a page from his book and reaches over to punch him lightly in the knee. ]

Then sit with me.

[he pulls his leg back, surprised--? he didn't expect her to do that.

but then... something about it makes him change his mind. he slowly lowers himself onto the floor, sitting cross-legged and slumped forward. he lets his arms rest uselessly against his knees, but refuses to look at her.

doesn't look angry, but he's not making eye contact with her. his eyes are on the floor. he says nothing about it, just waits.]

[ She smiles a little to herself when he actually does sit down rather than climb into his shuttle and leave. She doesn't mind that he doesn't say anything, content with this much. She's inwardly surprised he made this choice, but she remains silent for a long while and when she does speak, she doesn't say anything about him deciding to sit with her. ]

I used to be what is called in my homeworld a Dark Knight. I trained since I was a child to harness the powers of dark energy and utilize blood sacrifice to become such a warrior, because the queen of my country asked it of me. She had found me abandoned as little more than a newborn and because of that, I felt I owed her everything. She was my mother, my teacher, my disciplinarian. I loved her and I dedicated my entire life to her and the nation that she brought to, even though many people of that nation looked down on me because I was an orphan with no history.

I don't regret the things I did as a Dark Knight anymore, but looking back on it, if I hadn't felt I owed her a debt, I'm not certain this is the path I would have chosen for myself, no matter how much I loved her as a person.

My background as a Dark Knight is why I beat you. And my own choice to deviate from that background is how I healed you.

[he watches her again as she tells this story, watching her posture and what she does or doesn't do with her hands as much as he watches her face.

so he's met a giant killer and, now, another knight from a faraway land. he has nothing to say to it, but his questions are all being answered, and he nods to show that he's been paying attention.]

[ His continued attention is a bit unexpected, but not an unpleasant surprise. She stays quiet for a while, then: ]

I became captain of Baron's airship fleet, the youngest to do so in history, and war broke out. A lot happened and I was abducted to a place called Court. A universe like this-- a crossroads. Beings from all over the multiverse were dragged there for reasons nobody knew.

I changed there and I went home before I could forget that I was a knight, with duties and responsibilities. I can't go back anymore. I only have more duties and responsibilities now, as...

[ She closes her eyes and presses her lips together tightly, trying to force herself to be truthful by telling herself that it might teach him something. The problem is, she's not so sure what it is she's trying to teach him herself. ]

...as a queen. I regret leaving without saying goodbye, without asking them to leave with me.

[...he's not sure where she's going with this either. he's learning plenty about her, though her feelings don't strike much in the way of a meaningful chord...

still, he's listening. maybe she just needs to get this out. girls are like that.]

[ She's pretty much done now, looking back at him expectantly this time. When she sees she's not getting through to him, she only sighs and goes silent herself. ]

[he watches her eyes, leans forward a little to follow where her line of sight goes. he's still curious. he wants to know why she's bothering. it just doesn't make any sense to him.]

And.

[ That isn't a lot to go on, so she just blinks at him and quirks a brow. ]

"And" what?

[he's tired of talking. he considers not saying anything. the fact that he does fess up some words after a couple of seconds of deliberation speaks volumes about his involvement.]

What's your point.

Ahh...

[ She laughs again a little, looking away from him and out one of the view ports at the stars outside the ship. ]

My point, I guess, is that you don't have to be alone here if you don't want to be. I know it's frightening and disorienting, and everyone wants, needs to go home just like you, but we're all trapped together whether we like it or not. You don't have to carry whatever burdens you brought here with you alone.

So, maybe you should try letting the part of you that's kept you listening to me right now for this long breathe a little more.

Hm.

[a show of camaraderie. he can understand that, at the very least, though it helps him to think of it in terms of allegiances and contacts and resources. that last part, though--he feels it is misaligned.

with the blandest expression he can summon, he reaches over for her shoulder, slowly, and... gently shoves her towards the floor because that's stupid and she needs to stop and this is how he communicates his feelings.]

Assuming again.

Edited 2014-12-16 19:47 (UTC)

[ This time, she tips right over and just lies there on the ground for a moment before extending her leg and kicking him half-heartedly in the hip with her heel. ]

Well, I assumed I would wipe the floor with you and I wasn't wrong about that, now was I?

[ There's a hint of a smile on her face again and a teasing little tone to her voice. ]

mingle post? mingle post. MINGLE POST!!

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