clay тerran | ѕpace nerd (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
geonomy) wrote in ![[community profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/community.png)
driftfleet2015-11-25 08:13 pm
geonomy) wrote in driftfleet2015-11-25 08:13 pm
Entry tags:
play a jingle, it's a mingle!
Who: Vanquish crew and visitors
Broadcast: why
Action: Anywhere on board the Vanquish!
When: 11/25 and on!
[The ship is looking classier and cooler now, and what's this? Nice little gifts? Say it ain't so! Surely this must take some investigating!
Or, rather, some mingling! Haha!]
Broadcast: why
Action: Anywhere on board the Vanquish!
When: 11/25 and on!
[The ship is looking classier and cooler now, and what's this? Nice little gifts? Say it ain't so! Surely this must take some investigating!
Or, rather, some mingling! Haha!]
Have ten million apologies (and a gagtag) as I try to get back into this IF THAT IS OKAY
He does get the strength to look her in the eye. She should be his sister. As her brother, he has to try to make things right.]
Well... It's just... I don't know what to think. I know I said... a lot of things when I got here. Everything felt so fresh.
But I keep thinking. About what happened and about... about that weird dream thing the other month. I thought that I had lost you already when- what that happened.
[He shakes his head.]
Now it feels more like... I'm letting myself lose you. I... I don't want to give up anymore, Rogue. I want to try... to understand.
we can give it a shot!
Alright. Alright.
She kept her expression strictly neutral.]
What do ya wanna understand?
no subject
[He shakes his head.]
I know I was impossible when I came to this place. But... I want to listen now.
no subject
...I appreciate that when ya came here, it was a very raw pain for you. There is nothin' I can say or do that will change what happened on the cliff that night, an' while I am sorry for hurtin' you, an' sorry I was the one that killed her, I am not sorry she's dead. Kurt, she lied ta me from the day she took me in, she lied ta me an' made me think that the X-Men, you, were all tryin' ta kill me on the day I got my powers. Heck, she pretended ta be my friend an' used me again ta get the information an' access to the mansion which practically blew up the New Recruits. An' then she served me up ta Apocalypse like appetizers on a platter. I am not sorry she's dead. If I went back even now ta that cliff face, I still don't know what I'd do. And that's the truth.
[And when she'd told it to a stranger, to someone who barely knew her, he'd said good. And she shouldn't have needed to tell it to Kurt, he'd seen all this happen and still looked at her like she was a monster. She'd made a bad choice, one which she now saw as a natural choice, out of pain and grief and betrayal; she'd warned Kurt that she wasn't ready and he'd still pushed her. Maybe she was a monster, but she didn't stop living just because she'd turned into one. She believed that even monsters could turn around in their life, and she was no exception to the rule of redemption.
Kurt had helped her see that once. Twice, really. But right now, after months -- months -- of nothing from the one who should have been her closest friend in the fleet, someone who hadn't even expressed an interest in her five years of captivity? She didn't feel like she needed his forgiveness. He'd already given it to her twice. She wasn't going to go crawling to him on her knees; she had come to the slow and steady realization that she was not the only one who was wrong here. He was too. He should have listened to her.
They were both kids, and she forgave him for that although he'd likely never ask for it. But she wasn't going to let herself fall into the same level of guilt she had in the past; Jim had said good, and she didn't think he was entirely wrong either. She would tell Kurt the truth and see what he made of it.]
no subject
What did he want? A desperate hope that Mystique would change if they helped her - that she would somehow have answers he would want to hear? That Rogue would prove herself to be 'better' than Mystique by having mercy? He's not sure anymore. All that grief which felt so raw and overwhelming when he came here hasn't exactly gone away, but it's subsided enough to give rise to other feelings and thoughts.
And it's all helped Kurt to realize how blinded he has been by his own perspective. He had known that both of them had every reason to hate Mystique, but he could not properly understand the depths of Rogue's feelings. Even with whatever he remembers from that calibration room, he still feels like he's only scratching the surface. But all of that plus her words has helped him to realize one thing at least: that what she did does not invalidate her. It does not make her worse than Mystique. It's still too hard for Kurt to come to grips with the idea of someone needing to die for the greater good. Even someone as hurtful as Mystique.
His head raises enough so that he can glance at her, trying to meet her eyes with his own soft expression. And he can't find words to express everything that he's feeling right now, but instead he just breathes a word raggedly.]
O-okay. [At this moment, with his mind and heart still reeling, all he can manage is that word. A confirmation that he hears her, that he is listening this time.]
no subject
This is the third time we've had a conversation like this. Ya don't remember the first two times, 'course. The first time was back home, when it looked like I was leavin' the X-Men when Remy kidnapped me. The second time was in Luceti. You forgave me both times, 'cause you're a better person'n I am.
[She lifted her chin a little.] I ain't askin' you for that. I told ya how it is. Ya need ta accept that or not, 'cause neither one of us can go back an' change it.
no subject
First, he shakes his head in answer to his own question.]
Never mind, that doesn't matter now. This is... what's important.
I understand, Rogue. I get what happened. What happened is... it's done. And she's not here anymore, but... but we still are.