♢ 01

[effluent]

Who: Sarah Turner and you!
Broadcast: Fleetwide
Action: SS Golden
When: 12/06

[as the video flickers on, a blonde teenager stares intently at the camera before she flashes a toothy smile and leans in closer]

Aaaand there we go. Testing, one two-- [she taps the camera twice and grins a little wider as she hears feedback from her own device]

Is it too late for a Wizard of Oz reference? Because we sure are not in Kansas any more. [her left hand reaches up to fiddle with a strand of her wavy blonde hair as she looks up, past the camera]

So tell me if I leave anything out, because here's what I've got figured out so far. We're on Survivor: Space Edition, with just a dab of Star Travel mixed in for flavor. And I'm guessing instead of getting voted off the island, we get jetted off into space? Man, and I thought human reality TV was vicious. Turns out aliens are the real assholes.

[but despite that she laughs a bit at her own joke and turns her full attention back to the screen before she continues]

I guess the meet-and-greet comes next. Hey, I'm Sarah. [she wiggles the fingers of her right hand in a half-hearted wave] Nice to meet you, blah blah blah. While we're on the subject of introductions, I looked through the contestant list, and you guys have some wild names. Special shout out to "Belthazar" and "Adrasteius"... I can't tell if your parents were huge nerds, or if they just hated you.

So! Who all is out there? Don't be shy, I don't bite... much. [aaand yep, she accompanies that with another shit-eating-grin. She'll also be lounging around the Golden's kitchen area... Draped forward on the counter and snacking on her free pudding. Such a class act, this one.]

Comments

[Video]

[effluent]

[that's like the surest way to make sure she never says it]

Oh come on, you don't want to be friends. [...] Unless this is how you make friends, in which case I'll let you know.

You're terrible at this.

[Video]

[honorbends]

So I've been told.

[ god sarah you can't make him feel bad he's already self-deprecating !!!! ]

I used to be worse.

[ so there's

that ]

[Video]

[effluent]

[she makes an 'ugh' noise. ZUKO, you're no fun to pick on if you don't fight back.... she massages her forehead for a bit in mock exasperation]

Good for you? Like, I don't even know how I'm supposed to respond to that.

What do you mean by "worse"?

[Video] 1/2

[honorbends]

My first meeting with the majority of my friends didn't exactly go like it should. I tried to kill most of them.

[ you know

like normal teenagers ]

[Video]

[honorbends]

-- I failed, obviously.

[ just in case that wasn't clear ]

[Video]

[effluent]

[she stares at him as if she doesn't believe what he's saying, but then lets out a sharp bark of laughter before she narrows her eyes, as if there's a cosmic joke and only she's in on it]

Good job on getting that order right. You'd be a real monster if you did the opposite.

[Video]

[honorbends]

[ with a roll of eyes. ]

I'm not planning on going through all that effort and ruining it.

[ making friends is fucking hard okay ]

But thanks, I guess.