♢ 01

[effluent]

Who: Sarah Turner and you!
Broadcast: Fleetwide
Action: SS Golden
When: 12/06

[as the video flickers on, a blonde teenager stares intently at the camera before she flashes a toothy smile and leans in closer]

Aaaand there we go. Testing, one two-- [she taps the camera twice and grins a little wider as she hears feedback from her own device]

Is it too late for a Wizard of Oz reference? Because we sure are not in Kansas any more. [her left hand reaches up to fiddle with a strand of her wavy blonde hair as she looks up, past the camera]

So tell me if I leave anything out, because here's what I've got figured out so far. We're on Survivor: Space Edition, with just a dab of Star Travel mixed in for flavor. And I'm guessing instead of getting voted off the island, we get jetted off into space? Man, and I thought human reality TV was vicious. Turns out aliens are the real assholes.

[but despite that she laughs a bit at her own joke and turns her full attention back to the screen before she continues]

I guess the meet-and-greet comes next. Hey, I'm Sarah. [she wiggles the fingers of her right hand in a half-hearted wave] Nice to meet you, blah blah blah. While we're on the subject of introductions, I looked through the contestant list, and you guys have some wild names. Special shout out to "Belthazar" and "Adrasteius"... I can't tell if your parents were huge nerds, or if they just hated you.

So! Who all is out there? Don't be shy, I don't bite... much. [aaand yep, she accompanies that with another shit-eating-grin. She'll also be lounging around the Golden's kitchen area... Draped forward on the counter and snacking on her free pudding. Such a class act, this one.]

Comments

Video

[save_the_souls]

[Oh Lord this girl. Normally he'd probably flip right past not wanting to deal with this, but she had to be rude about Belth and Adra's names. Ugh]

...Belthazar and Adrasteius are elven names. Because they're elves.

Video

[effluent]

[her grin shrinks to a smile, and her eyebrows shoot up as he talks. Elves, huh?]

Riiiiiight. Elves. Should I ask them for some cookies from their tree-house while I'm in town?

Video

[save_the_souls]

[. . .]

No. I don't think that'd go over well with them.

video

[acuition]

[ Speaking of weird names, here's One.

That was a terrible joke, but also that's her name. ]

It may be dangerous here, but I doubt you're in any danger of being ejected from the ship.

video

[effluent]

[I literally snorted]

Really? Well shit, now I probably just gave them a great idea. Sorry everyone.

[although...] What kind of danger is there?

video

[acuition]

[ :') ]

I doubt that. We're here for their entertainment-- that wouldn't give them anything.

Though I've heard the ships have come under attack before. I haven't been here long enough to experience it.

video

[timelapsed]

Don't worry, nobody gets jettisoned into space. Just get your privacy horribly invaded.

video

[effluent]

[she laughs in a short, snort-like sound]

Faaantastic. So what are we dealing with... Cameras in the shower?

video;

[ino]

[ She just sighs, pinching the bridge of her nose. ]

It's perfectly normal where they come from, you know. I've never heard of anyone named "Sarah" before, either.

video;

[effluent]

Wait, are you serious? [but she looks so... normal.]

It's like, literally the most common name in the country. For my age group, or something like that. Never a single Sarah?

video;

[arcanepower]

[You want a provocation, you got it. Belthazar might have a cute face but his green eyes are glowing brightly and unnaturally, and there is a veritable storm of purple magic swirling around him.]

Speak of my parents one more time and I will incinerate you so thoroughly that even Atroma won't be able to bring you back!

video;

[effluent]

[he is sure baby faced but that is real-ass magic behind him, and that causes her to raise an eyebrow and try very hard to play it cool]

Jesus, talk about an overreaction. So which one are you... Belthzenable or... Ass face?

[she literally already forgot the two names she made fun of]

video

[experiencepoints]

[The video reply here is coming from another blonde girl, in what appears to be a magical girl costume of some kind.]

So... You show up, start insulting people who have been here way longer... Are you trying to piss off everyone else here?

Re: video

[effluent]

[. . . well this is uncanny. she doesn't respond right away and just stares at this new girl on her turf before she asks]

What's with the get up? [10000% not the answer to the asked quston]

Action

[averagestar]

[Someone new again! Let's meet and... wait, what the-?

But before we talk about how you look pretty close to someone I followed back home, let's focus on the important things: Introductions, then we can try to move on to damage control.]

Um... Welcome to the Golden. I'm the ship's communication's officer, Uzuki Shimamura. Or... I guess you're a communications officer now, too? Let's do our best together! In the mean time, if there are any questions, now would be a good time to ask. Also, I'm kind of working on something of an upgrade for our communications system, but it might take a while before it's finished, so if you need help figuring anything out with it, just say so.

Action

[effluent]

[Hm, she settles in and props her chin in her hand, watching this girl lazily as she talks. So someone else can do the job that she does? P e r f e c t.]

Wow, lots of info up front. Did you rehearse that? [but she flashes a casual smile, to show she's joking (mostly...)] What kind of upgrade are you working on?

video

[huaaaaagh]

You might have a hard time making allies here with a first impression like that.

[From one socially malfunctioning person to another, he can somewhat relate.]

video

[effluent]

[she laughs softly under her breath and tilts her head]

Haven't you ever taken Reality TV 101? 'I'm not here to make friends' is the name of the game.

[Video]

[honorbends]

[ w o w

he can hear allen's ragefit from here ]

Congratulations on the world's worst first impression.

[ hashtag hypocrisy ]

not here

[bolder]

[Video]

[effluent]

[she raises a hand to her mouth in a mock-gasp]

Oh no. People on the magical reality show space ship might not like me? Oh whatever will I do?

video;

[hymnals]

[Adra ain't bovvered. He's had a lot worse thrown at him than a simple sneer at his name. Belthazar, however ...]

You like mocking children, eh? That's fun for you.

video;

[effluent]

[children? That other guy did look awfully young, but at least like a young teen]

I guess you could call it a talent. And you all might need it, seems like a fleet full of people with awfully thin skin.

action

[unfulfilledpotential]

[After watching.... whatever the heck THAT broadcast was, Shawn wanders into the kitchen because he needs a drink. Except, of course, the lovely lady's on his ship too.

You can almost see the incoming groan on his face as he helps himself to some soda.]

That was uh, quite the introduction you made there.

action

[effluent]

[she looks over her shoulder at him, and leans over the kitchen counter so that her elbows are resting on the counter, and her chin is propped up by her clasped hand and her shoulder]

Well hey there, stranger. [she's in a mood, but she's not dumb enough to actively antagonize her crew right out of the gate. It was the same with Uzuki, you have to scope out the situation before you make a move in these cases]

What can I say, I like to make a splash. [she sits up strait and twirls around in her chair so that she's facing him]

So who are you?