[Video]

[timelysteward]

[And hey look, it's a clock! You know, that walking and talking clock you all know, love, and some tolerate. He sniffs, holding up a piece of paper.]

Greetings, all. I am Cogsworth, for those who do not know me. For those who do, I am alive ... [a roll of the eyes] so to speak, and I am making this announcement so you know I have not been kidnapped or held against my will or have become an ... inanimate object in which will never change and never enjoy the feeling of flesh ever again -

[He cuts himself off.]

Anyways. That is all. Still Captain, still alive, still here.