six ☀ video

[deshabille]

Who: Mal & u
Broadcast: Fleetwide
Action: Arslae, if there is any!
When: Right meow.

[Witness a grumpy captain making a face that's the vampire equivalent of a cat put in a bath. Mal is huffing and puffing along the outskirts of the nearest salt town, bundled up tight (all in black as usual, and please note that she does not have to huff or puff but is rather doing it for dramatic effect).]

So, question. What in the hell is a Christmas? Half of you keep talking about it like it's the beginning of a new universe and I'm a bit puzzled, because there's nothing like that where I'm from.

. . . Actually there really aren't holidays where I'm from, but where I'm from is shit so nevermind. Other places there's something sort of maybe similar, called Hogswatch, where a big man in a red suit rides around on a sledge pulled by hogs, obviously, and gives presents to the deserving children, ie the ones with rich parents, probably.

Explain, then. The person with the most entertaining explanation will get a prize.

Comments

text

[droprate]

[ Sorry, they're not much for the video and voice options! Enjoy this very textual response to your cool video, Mal. ]

It's a beloved holiday, where parents lie to their children and tell them that a man will break into the house and leave gifts behind in exchange for food.

[deshabille]

[She will PERSEVERE IN HER COOL VIDEO-ING and. Grin a little at this response.]

So it's a barter transaction that doubles as bribery. Well played.

[droprate]

The legends also say that unless the child behaves throughout the year, they'll only get rocks instead of presents.

[ Doesn't it just sound weird when you put it like that... ]

[deshabille]

The legends sound deliciously stupid. Rocks are very useful.

[droprate]

Children aren't hoping for "useful," they just want something fun.

[ Chara you are a child. ]

[deshabille]

I never wanted fun when I was a child. I just wanted to punch things.

[droprate]

Sounds like someone would've gotten a bunch of coal.

[deshabille]

Yes, and then I would have lit a fire with it and been the most productive child.

And then punched someone again. Hurrah, I win Christmas.

[droprate]

[ They like her already, a little. ]

Why not light a fire and then push someone into it?

[deshabille]

Ooh, I could at that. So light a fire and find my least favorite person, push him in . . . get more coal, make the fire bigger. This is a good system!

[droprate]

I'll share my coal with you, if I get any.

[deshabille]

Do you think you will?

Does the Hogfather exist in space? Or the other one, the not-Hogfather.

[droprate]

Probably not. Since it wasn't really some guy, it was just kids' parents.

I wasn't expecting anything, anyway.