duck tales, oo-ooh!

[frigidaire]

Who: Crew & Visitors of the Wonderduck
Action: The Wonderduck
When: a mingle for the month of January!

[ come one, come all, crew members and visitors alike. come play terrible rec-room games or eat awful, overly processed food! or just mingle! ]

Comments

[thezerothlaw]

[Illness is vaguely alarming to Daneel in general, as he's had very little experience with it. He's pretty sure that sneezes aren't supposed to leave marks like that. Pretty sure. He looks directly at a caw, and back at his captain.]

Is this normal for you?

[feathery]

Ugh, no.

[He is so offended by the idea that he's sick that he's entertaining the idea that maybe he's allergic to Jade's fox. Never mind the fact he was surrounded by who knows how many of the little assholes at the pet shop.]

I mean which part. 'Cause the fireworks are within the realm of reason, I guess. Normal for my feathery freakshow.

[thezerothlaw]

The... fireworks, as you put it. I have never seen a sneeze leave a visible mark. Is this something I should be concerned about?

[feathery]

Uh. [The long blank look says it all.] Maybe. I mean I'm probably not gonna laserify anything too important, but you should keep precious textiles out of range. Be a shame if I fucked up a one of a kind Persian rug, or something.

[Who the fuck says things like that? This kid, apparently.]

Also maybe if I'm contagious. I got no fucking idea.

[thezerothlaw]

I doubt very much that a robot can catch any sort of biological virus. Nor do we have any expensive rugs, to my knowledge.

[Still he hovers sort of anxiously.]

Is there anything I am able to do? I understand soup is helpful in these cases.

[feathery]

[Davesprite is not used to the semi-anxious mom hover and has no idea what to make of it. But he shrugs a little helplessly.]

I got a hefty chunk of game code floating around my brain, but that didn't preclude me from nothing. But don't worry about it, dude. I don't know if soup would do anything for me, anyway. [His existence is weird at best.]

[thezerothlaw]

[He hesitates.]

Do you eat? If you do, then perhaps it cannot hurt. It may at least ease your suffering.

[He won't assume eating. He doesn't, anyway.]

[feathery]

[His suffering. Sweet jesus, Davesprite is embarrassed by virtue of Daneel's sincerity alone.]

I can eat, but I don't have to. Probably. It's complicated. [Understatement.]

I'll be ok in a couple days, either way, unless it turns out I'm allergic to the miniaturized hellbeast.

[thezerothlaw]

[Daneel looks at him with the quiet bafflement of someone who takes things literally.]

To what are you referring?

[feathery]

You know, Newt. The salamander fox.

[He glances around their feet like he expects it to show up any second.]

Little white furball that chews on anything that holds still long enough.

[thezerothlaw]

Ah, yes. You are not fond of it?

[That's unfortunate. Daneel isn't used to pets, but they seem really nice to him...]

[feathery]

It thinks I'm some kind of canine pacifier.

[Which isn't really a confirmation or denial. Davesprite doesn't mind the fox, really, but being the guy who bought it for Jade doesn't keep him from sassing about it.]

I haven't figured out how to foxproof myself.

[thezerothlaw]

That may prove to be difficult. I wish you luck.

[He's... not sure how to help, sadly.]

[feathery]

Yeah.

[He makes a mild face at the thought before he sneezes, bringing an arm up to cover his face.

Which doesn't really do much for the lasers he conjures up, spattering the word shit against the wall.]

Goddamn, no wonder sprites are antiprogrammed against this shit.

[thezerothlaw]

[He tilts his head, rather curiously.]

You refer to yourself as a 'sprite.' I've wondered, if it not offensive to ask, what sort of being you are?

[feathery]

I'm a fucking biohazard, that's what.

[But he makes a dismissive gesture at the idea of the inquiry being offensive.]

You ever play video games, dude.

[thezerothlaw]

I have experimented a little with the games available to us here. They seem very primitive. I have seen more advanced ones before coming here, but I have never played them.

[Robots are rarely invited into such things, and his owners were generally not fans of that sort of entertainment.]

[feathery]

[On the upside, it means Davesprite doesn't have to give Daneel a longwinded, probably difficult to understand spiel that attempts to explain video games.]

Ok, well, I pulled NPC duties in a video game for a little while. Guidebook BS for the most part, but I wasn't that great at it and gave it up pretty quick. The bird and Dave deal are incidental.

[Which is a shitty way to talk about the things that actually make him who he is, but whatever.]

[thezerothlaw]

[Daneel blinks, briefly. None of that makes sense.]

I don't understand how you were in a video game in a role like this.

[feathery]

I don't really, either, but it's just one of those world mechanics.

[He's well aware his life doesn't make sense and he shrugs, because it's easier to be irreverent about it.]

Suffice to say, I used to be a floating orange ghostbird with more useless digital wisdom than an unmoderated message board.

[thezerothlaw]

[He stares for a long moment.]

... That seems improbable.

[feathery]

[Davesprite stares back.]

But not impossible. [Right. Right??????]

[thezerothlaw]

Evidently not.

[He'd say it was impossible. Apparently he's the only one.]

[feathery]

[You're a bro, Daneel.]

Thank you. But ok, so you're a robot, right. There's got to be some impossibility factor to that from my perspective. Probably. Maybe. Ok, maybe not, but I'm trying to be generous and limit my pandimensional expectations.

[thezerothlaw]

Indeed. What you describe would be impossible from my perspective, and perhaps I am impossible from yours. The multiverse is more complicated than I once thought.