and it burns burns burns, the ring of fire

[got_it_memorized]

Who: Axel and anyone on Bloodsport and Tourist
Broadcast: Seemingly anonymous text to everyone on Bloodsport
Action: Anyone on Tourist
When: Tuesday, 30December, late morning

Broadcast
[Axel had spent a little time toying with the computers in Castle Oblivion, but the communications augment this place gave him is coming in really handy now. He spent about fifteen minutes messing with functions and filters and poked through the rosters to figure out which ship Riku was on--he never should have said Axel wouldn't be able to bug him from a whole other ship, because so help him, he's going to bug the crap out of him now. He was going to send a slew of annoying text messages to just Riku, but it'd be more fun to be obnoxious at his entire crew, right? Setting the filter for anyone onboard the Bloodsport, Axel decides that he might as well be educational while he's being insufferable. All texts appear to come from an anonymous source.]

Fire Facts! Everything you ever wanted to know about fire and never thought to ask! A candle flame burns at approximately 1800 degrees Fahrenheit, or 1000 degrees Celsius.



Action for anyone onboard the Tourist
[Axel is in the dining area, his feet propped up and a big sly grin on his face as he sends messages from his communicator. There's a plate of barely-touched (questionable) food nearby--he's really not sure about this protein gel stuff. Feel free to give him some pointers on how to make it more palatable. Or maybe ask what's so amusing, if you dare...]

Comments

text.

[limitstorm]

Who is this?

text

[got_it_memorized]

Smoking is the primary cause of death by fire. Don't smoke, everyone!

[This is hilarious already.]

text

[limitstorm]

I know this is you, Axel.

[got_it_memorized]

I'm sure I don't know what you're talking about.

No one actually knows who invented fire hydrants. The patent caught fire.

1/2

[limitstorm]

[ pfffff--

no, no laughing! ]

[limitstorm]

There's no way that's true.

[got_it_memorized]

Cross my heart. ;)

[limitstorm]

[ he's almost petty enough to drop the 'you have a starting one now actually' bomb, but... he's not too mean. ]

I could block you.

[got_it_memorized]

I'd just find a way around it. These computers aren't so tough.

Did you know the bark of the redwood tree is fireproof?

action.

[clownshoes]

[ and, naturally, there is a sora lurking around nearby, ready to sneak right up on him. ]

What are you doing, Axel?

action.

[got_it_memorized]

[He glances up, a little surprised to see Sora there. He's not used to this whole being friendly gig--last he checked, Sora was wary of him at best, and honestly with good reason. He's still a little unsure about the whole being a good guy now thing, but if it means he doesn't have to fight Keyblade wielders anymore, he'll take it. Fighting Sora was a pain. Literally. The kid hit like a ton of bricks.

[Axel waves casually, then holds up his communicator.]

Educating the masses. What are you doing?

text

[birdsbirdsbirds]

[on the one hand, he's not comms-savvy enough to trace this back to another ship. but on the other hand, he's pretty sure that either a person or "Atroma" is responsible, so... let the games begin.]

Is that so?

٩(◕‿◕｡)۶

text

[got_it_memorized]

[Oh good, someone else to play with!]

100% so.

In building fires, wall masonry collapses at approximately 760 degrees Fahrenheit.

text

[birdsbirdsbirds]

I did not know that!

Did you know that blood can't be set on fire? The water content is too high. About 50% of your blood, in fact, is made of water.

[got_it_memorized]

I actually never tried to set anybody's blood specifically on fire; duly noted.

[birdsbirdsbirds]

Cultists try the weirdest things, yeah. (」ﾟヘﾟ)」

So are you a professional or an enthusiast?

[got_it_memorized]

[Cultists? Oh, this just got interesting.]

Can't I be both? You might say what started out as a professional skill became a personal hobby as well.

Here's a fun one: soaking a cottonball in superglue can make it spontaneously combust.

[birdsbirdsbirds]

[that's what he's here for.]

Not a bad thing to enjoy your vocation, I guess.

Nice, I've got to try that. Though, I'm sure you know you can use the end of a 9V battery to set steel wool on fire.

[not_mafia]

[There's a pathetic whine coming from over near the food dispenser from a very miserable, very hungry child.]

Isn't there any real food here...?

[got_it_memorized]

[He glances up from his texting when he hears a whine, and for a moment he thinks it's Sora. Skinny kid with spiky brown hair, he really does look like him, but something doesn't feel quite right. The spikes are wrong, he decides--maybe Sora has a brother. Wouldn't the Organization love to hear that?]

'Fraid not, kiddo. [He puts his feet down and leans forward, propping his elbows on his knees.] I looked, too, but it seems our only option is to try and make something outta that weird gel stuff. [He wrinkles his nose a little.] I have a feeling everyone is going to lose some weight. [Not that he can afford to lose much--he's got like no fat below his head.]

[not_mafia]

Heh--! O-oh!

[THERE'S A PERSON IN HERE. You'd think a person would be more aware of their surroundings in a strange environment. Hunger is very distracting, though.]

Ehh-- seriously?

[He looks at the machine with a sad and longing expression. Maybe if he stares at it long enough, it'll become an ice cream machine.]

I'm gonna starve...

[got_it_memorized]

[The kid looks startled and Axel holds both palms up as if to show he's unarmed. He wasn't even trying to be sneaky!]

I dunno about starving... Hunger drives a hard bargain. [He sort of prods the plate in front of him, dipping his pinkie into the teriyaki gel and sticking in into his mouth, then making a bit of a face.] Though I do recommend using the microwave. This stuff's pretty eugh cold.

[not_mafia]

[Don't worry Axel, startled is his default state of being!]

Does the temperature really make any difference?

[Now he has the task of choosing his poison.]

[got_it_memorized]

Well, it doesn't change the fact that it's flavored goo or anything. [No sense giving the kid false hope.] It does make it a little more palatable, though.

I don't think we've met, have we? I'm Axel, and they tell me I'm in charge of communications around here.

[not_mafia]

Oh... nice to meet you.

[He gives a little bow of his head.]

My name's Tsuna.

[........... yeah he's not saying anything about his job]