driftfleet | Paisley mingle

Thank you. [He's so desperate that when he squeezes her hands, it doesn't feel like it's enough. Part of him wants more.] This... feeling...

It doesn't ever go away, does it?

No.

[Because it doesn't. She may not have an Elena, but she's lost so many others, and sometimes she still sees them in her dreams. Mark's easy-going smirk and his stark passion for people; Sirius' dark eyes, and the tightness of his arms when he found out what she'd gone through; Rise's smile in the bright sun. They'll never leave her.]

But it gets better. You learn who they helped you become, and who you can be to make them proud. And after that... [They're always with you.]

[He lets out a slow, resigned sigh.] Back home, they never left. They would forget - sometimes big things, sometimes little things - but they were always with you.

It wasn't much like the Fleet or your castle, now that I'm really thinking about it.

[Alex can't decide which of those is worse, but she feels like at least seeing her friends again, and knowing they were safe, would be worth it. She knows some of them were going home to terrible situations, and the uncertainty is hard to bear.]

Yeah, it was different. They'd just get zapped away, in the middle of that night, and that was that. You'd never see them again.

Just like here, then. [...] I mean, amnesia sucks, because without their memories, they'd move back home or go abroad or leave the country...

But then you'd hear from them, and they'd always have your back, even when they didn't have any reason to.

[She nods, imagining what that must be like.]

... Sometimes the castle would bring back people you'd known, only they wouldn't have any of their memories. And you could try to remind them, but it just wouldn't work. You'd still be a stranger.

I think this place does that too, though. Me and Hermione were never friends or anything, but she should at least remember me.

But she doesn't? [Weird. Stefan almost wonders if that "parallel universe" theory's true.] Is there anyone else that's happened to, or is that just a Hermione thing?

I don't know. I didn't really talk to a bunch of people back there, so they probably wouldn't remember me anyway.

[He shakes his head.] You left more of an impact than you think. Even if you didn't talk to them, you've got this presence that - trust me - makes it impossible not to take notice.

[She starts to shake hers as well, but just shrugs instead. This was supposed to be about him missing Elena, not her own insecurities. She starts to feel bad for mentioning it at all.]

You must be thinking of someone else.

Nah. My brain's not that jumbled up.

[He scrunches up his whole face at her, pulling the pillow pet-thing closer to his chest. It's practically becoming a security blanket.]

Just a little jumbled.

[She tips her head over to press a kiss to his cheek.]

Yeah. [...] Thanks for staying with me.

I miss her a lot, but who knows? Maybe I'll see her again some day.

I wouldn't leave if you paid me.

[... Okay, depends on how much.]

And you were lucky enough to run into her here. Most people don't get that. So I'm sure it won't be the last time.

[His face falls, right as she mentions most people. Right. How selfish could he be, to mourn her when so many others don't get their loved ones?]

Of course. [It's quieter, more pensive than normal for him.] Did I ever tell you the full story? Er, do you want the full story?

You never told me. But you can if you want to.

[He's quiet for a couple of seconds, gathering his thoughts before he begins:]

I was out hunting one night when I hear a car crash into the river. So I jump in and - there she is, floating in the water. [He lets out a small laugh.] It sounds so - so cliche when I say it like that, but the first time I met Elena, I pulled her out of the water and wondered why the hell she looked so much like Katherine.

So I transferred into Mystic Falls High that fall, and I figured, if I were attending high school all over again, I'd get to know her. And I did and... for the first time in a century, I felt normal. Or well, Salvatore felt normal.

[He pauses there, quietly adding,] I don't remember a lot about the two and a half years I dated her, but I remember what she was like, and how she pulled me back into a town I'd almost forgotten about. So to hear that she's gone is...

It doesn't feel real.

[She tries to fight off the insecurity that his story brings. After all, she did agree to hear it. She knows it doesn't mean he loves her any less. But two and a half years...

Swallowing her discomfort, Alex reaches down to take his hand.]

I'm so sorry, Stef.

[The worst part is, he's glossing over everything else. He's glossing over how he and Elena were doppelgangers destined to fall in love every 500 years (or 150 years, or whatever because that math still makes no sense in his head). He's glossing over how she reacted to his vampirism (not well), how she pushed through anyways, and well - their entire story.

Because in the end, Elena was then and Alex is now, and Alex matters more. Mystic Falls is a long-off dream, and one he may never see again.]

Hey, I've still got you. [He smiles, though it doesn't reach his eyes.] I've lost Elena before, but I don't know what I'd do if I lost you too.

Paisley mingle

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