ACTION | guess who's back, back again (and sad about stuff)

[collegedropout]

Who: Sam Winchester
Broadcast: N/A
Action: SS Red Fish, space station
When: Today (3-3-16) and for rest of week in the station!

I. RED FISH - Locked to those involved in his waking up.

[The last thing that flashes in Sam's mind is pain - a sort of blinding, horrible, familiar pain. One he's endured before, both inside and outside the Cage. The last memory he has is of Lucifer -- Castiel -- Lucifer, it was Lucifer, and he had speared his hand into Sam's chest and gripped his soul there, pinched his nails into the light and was twisting it, wrenching it, pulling a scream from him before he lost consciousness. And then suddenly he's wide awake with a gasp, jumping up and staggering. He's so out of it, memory still a scratchy blur. Where is Lucifer? He puts a hand to the ache where the devil's hand had been.

He has to get Dean. Save Castiel. But he has no chance against... no chance...

His first thought isn't a space ship, and his first thought isn't being lightyears from home. His first thought is I have to protect myself, or Dean is definitely dead. He smashes a nearby mug, the glass a temporary weapon. Then he staggers out into the halls, the dreary skull decor right out of Lucifer's handbook, white glass clenched in hand.

His vision swarms in colors. He cuts his hand wide open. He's always cutting his hands open. He puts his hand to the wall and begins to paint a symbol in his blood. A sigil. Angel banishment. It will get rid of Lucifer; get him out, make sure he can't twist his fingers in Sam's soul again, give Sam time to think, wrap his pounding brain around what's happening. This isn't the bunker...? Was he teleported?

He's nearly done with the sigil. His hand is steady enough, and it's only minutely sloppy from the rush of finishing it before anything splatters him on the walls...]

II. Red Fish - OTA

[It's not too long after that his memory returns fully to him (and with it, guilt, because he kind of almost banished Cas into space). He sits in the kitchen with a troubled, thoughtful expression taking over his features, his hands wrapped around a less broken mug -- tea. His left hand is bandaged again, and every once and a while he presses the thumb of his uninjured hand into the wound. It's real. He breathes in, breathes out. He won't ask for this to be healed; he'd like it left as is.

He doesn't leave the kitchen for a few hours, just until he can... pull himself together. Something.

Castiel said yes. For some reason, he said yes. Dean is on a submarine heading for death. Sam is probably dead. Dean's vanished from the Fleet. He tries to piece together a silver lining.

Can't currently be done, turns out.]

III. Space station - Bar - OTA

[... Well, he can't just lock himself in the ship. The next day, he forces himself to return to the bar he's been working at; the main owner is surprised to see him, said that an orange-haired woman had told him he was likely not coming back in. Sam wastes no time reclaiming his place behind the bar, and he pastes on a slight smile as he prepares drinks for the ladies at the end of the bar, same as usual.

They say fake it 'til you make it, and Sam's always been pretty good at it.

(Until he's not, but whatever.)

This too shall pass. And then he can let it fester without concerning anyone else, like normal.

(There's gotta be something he can do.)]

IV. Space station - shopping - OTA

[Towards the end of the week, he goes out to see what he can afford on the credits he has. As it turns out, there's some very colorful yarn that he thinks Katie or Sansa might like, so he buys that. He also finds a new mug to replace the one he broke, because he does kind of feel bad that he shattered a perfectly good mug. Maybe he should just spend his credits buying other people stuff, because he's actually kind of feeling a little better doing that.

And that is went Sam became a temporary shop-a-holic.

One may find him traveling back with a few bags of things.

...... Just. Y'know. Things.

Maybe this is why there are talkshow specials on compulsive spending.]

Comments

[experiencepoints]

[Nightingale, having been hard at work trying to get that fox park set up, does occasionally need breaks. And what better place for a break than the bar? At least, to her credit, she's been going there a lot less lately, but still gives Sam a slight wave when she spots him. She should probably make an effort to talk to him, and do so nicely, since the last time she spoke to him was... her being depressing as fuck. Be positive, Nightingale, you can do it.]

Hey, haven't seen you in a while.

I. I guess pile in here!

[namisan]

[Nami's visiting is a constant, usually swinging past the Red Fish after a bar shift, checking in, noting no change; his crew looks after him plenty fine, so there's not much for her to do except sit for a while and carry on half a conversation sometimes and then leave again, an hour after she'd come.

She's grown used to it, and the reassurance that he will wake up is only half helpful, because that reassurance came hand in hand with the idea of future memories. It's the reason she still visits, hoping that maybe he'll choose to wake up while she's there. Maybe it's needed. Maybe it isn't.

Used to it. So yeah, when Sam surges up out of bed like that, it's kind of a shock, and she recoils on her chair in surprise as he stumbles around the room.]

Sam...?

[He's white, shaking, and paying no attention to her at all. But maybe that's to be expected, considering. She's slow to move after him, not at all sure she should intervene. Up until the point he breaks the mug, at least. Then her voice is sharp enough to ring down the corridor of the Red Fish.]

Sam!

[What the hell are you doing?]

Dog pile on Sam

[child_of_bhaal]

[It's blood that catches her notice first. Blood always calls, signaling suffering, potential death. But she's not yet a slave to the thrill of death, and she calmly starts walking in search of the source. Thinking perhaps someone was just careless and hurt themselves.

And then she hears the shouting and picks up her pace. Rounding a corner, she sees Sam, and his friend -Nami? Isn't that her name? She needs to get her head back in order. She's missing all sorts of important things- and there's the blood being painted on the wall.]

What's going on here? Sam, what are you doing?

Sounds normal

[collegedropout]

[Sam looks back in startled confusion for a moment; he doesn't seem to be all there, not even when Nami and Sye call out to him -- but he tries to see through the mental fog as his mind and augment catch up. What are they doing here...? They shouldn't be here. Think. Think -- is this a fever dream? Is this Hell? Has he been dragged back down, after his soul's been used for whatever Lucifer's needs are?

His throat feels dry, and he speaks hoarsely -- breathlessly -- as he puts out a bloody hand to stop them; that hand is always bloody, always has a reason to be sliced into.]

Don't -- stay back. I need...

I need to make it safe. Stop him from getting in -- staying here. He's too strong to fight... It's almost done, I just...

[namisan]

[She didn't even see him cut his hand open, but it's across the palm and not the wrist so let's not panic just yet. Instead Nami glances up as Syeira enters the corridor with a small shake of her head. Sup, Captain-type.]

He just woke up. I don't think-- Sam. [She tries to catch the bloody hand-- lightly enough, not exerting force, mainly just to draw attention, hi, hello, I'm really here.] You're on the Red Fish. You're back on the Fleet.

[And given how he woke up, she swallows uneasily and says:] He's not here.

[Whoever he is. She can make a couple guesses, though.]

II

[interstices]

[Asuka pops in the kitchen a lot these days, mostly because it's generally peaceful there. Sitting around by her bed is too much like being back at WILLE and waiting on the next sortie. The station... it's okay, but overall too flashy for her preferences.]

[That being said, she has gone out there a few times, securing silly tourist-trap treats. She's munching on what at least looks and tastes somewhat like pastel macarons as she walks into the room, bag of the confections in her hand. At his presence, Asuka blinks once, then sort of shakes her head.]

I thought you weren't coming out of that.

[Another crunch and then she pulls up a chair in front of him, mild, usual frown on her face. He'd been all right to talk to earlier, and though she doesn't seek out too many people's company, he seems a bit too lost and weird for her to just abandon him in the kitchen alone. It's too much like ditching Shinji.]

You look like hell.

[collegedropout]

[Ah. Sam's demeanor switches up -- the uneasy, quiet contemplation becomes a thin-lipped smile, where it doesn't quite reach his eyes. He's used to it, having to sort of make things okay just through grinning and bearing it. He misses Dean already. He's worried about Dean infinitely, back home. Seems hard to imagine a good ending scenario to what just went down in his world.

But fuck it, he's gonna be positive toward the person he told to be positive.]

Oh, yeah. You know how it is. Awake one moment, knocked out for a few weeks the next.

Someone even painted my nails.

[child_of_bhaal]

[She returns Nami's nod, small and short, reverting her attention back to Sam immediately. She moves forward, towards him, calm and unhurried, hands slightly up to show she's unarmed and means no harm. She won't grab for him, not yet, not with Nami already trying to touch him. He's clearly already disoriented and on edge, too much stimulation could push him over the edge. But she wants to be close enough to intervene if that does happen.]

Sam, it's all right. You're safe. Nothing is going to harm you here.

[experiencepoints]

... A few weeks.

[well, now she just looks alarmed.]

Are you all right?

[collegedropout]

[He looks between them for a moment, lost. The Red Fish? Well, that'd explain all the red hair around here. What's Nami doing here...? And that's...? He remembers bits at a time, even if it trickles in slowly. He doesn't reciprocate Nami's attempt to touch, though, because she doesn't seem to understand the urgency. He pulls his hand back and shakes his head.]

Nami... Sye — you're wrong. I just saw...

[He sucks in a breath. Blood drips on steadily to the floor.]

You can't know that.

[A pause. He looks in a circle, around the hallway of the ship.]

... Wait... This is — familiar.

[namisan]

[Yeah, that doesn't surprise her. If gentle touch doesn't work for you, Sam, let's be matter of fact.]

You're back in the Fleet. I don't know if you remember-- [Is that like Adstring was, then? Sanji went home and forgot he was ever there. Talk about updating, Cole.] --you probably don't. But you fell into a coma a couple weeks ago. Either you just woke up from one hell of a nightmare, or you got new memories from home.

Bad ones, I'm assuming. [When are they ever not.] But they didn't follow you here. Please don't... [Her gaze slides to the symbol on the wall. Painted in blood.] Don't do whatever that is.

And II like the greedy person I am

[namisan]

[Nami doesn't follow him to the kitchen. Give him time to get used to the idea of being back, nurse a drink... she helps Sye clean up the bloody print on the wall and the glass fragments from Sam's room.

But she isn't leaving the Red Fish without talking to him. Not after the fiasco in the hallway. And they're crew, right? Crewmates just don't let crewmates brood on their own.

When she does enter the kitchen, it's to lay a line of credit chips on the table next to him, scattering them very slightly with a slide of her fingers.]

Here.

IV

[flickerflash]

[She... actually follows him for a while without saying anything. Katie has absolutely no idea why he slept for so long, but she thinks maybe it was kind of bad for him.

Your echoes are just a little darker, Sam. And while she's relieved to find you up and on your feet again, she's hanging back to make note of the differences before she gets distracted by other things. Just in case.]

all these redheads on this post aw yea

[collegedropout]

[Ah — Asuka. He smiles up at her quietly from his place at the table, hoping she didn't hear him causing a ruckus earlier... Probably on the station, during that whole fiasco, which is one small mercy. Last thing he needs is knowing other people saw his little episode. But it's true, he looks terrible. Tired and beat-up in every way but physically, though his bandaged hand is another matter.]

Sorry. Didn't mean to check out like that.

[He appreciates the check-in. He'll give her his best energy, which isn't much, but it's better than a dark cloud over his head.]

Guess if you sleep for a few weeks, you look pretty messed up.

[collegedropout]

[Sam snaps out of his small trance when she lays down the chips, flinching and glancing up before he relaxes again; he's on edge, but that much was obvious not too long ago. He'd offered to clean his mess, but you know how it is. You get shooed away to tend to yourself, to lick your own wounds.

He reaches out with his uninjured hand, slowly scooping up the credits.

His brow furrows.]

What're these for...?

[namisan]

When it was obvious you weren't waking up any time soon, I swung by to let the bar know. [She slides into the seat opposite, glance flicking to the bandaged hand.] That's the last pay they owe you. I wasn't...sure you'd wake up again before we left the station.

Dean helped me get you back here. He was worried. Though he thought you were just drunk at first. [Said with a small quirk of the lips.] He was here a lot of the time.

[...just so, you know. He only vanished a couple days ago.]

I'm sorry, Sam.

[She still doesn't know the details of your home visit, but missing Dean's exit from the place... well. That's shitty as hell.]

III. Space Station Bar

[nostraightlines]

[ Ramse's low on the credits he's earned hauling things around on the space station, but what better place to blow what he does have at the end of the day than at a bar? He could certainly use a drink.

This is the first place he found, not being terribly familiar with the space station yet, and he takes a seat at the bar, a modest distance from everyone else. He learned some bar ettiquite back in Eudio, and raises his hand when he catches the bartender's eye. Over here, yeah.

He looks tired and stressed and just a little worried, though the latter might be a permanent expression considering his life in general and their current state.

Nevertheless, it's time to drink it away. ]

sob yes

[interstices]

What happened to you?

[After grabbing a few more of the sweets for herself, Asuka shoves the bag of macarons across the table as if in gruff payment. Her eye roves briefly over the bandage on his hand. He definitely didn't end up with that in his sleep, but she figures if he really wants her to know, he'll tell her.]

[If anything, he looks like he could use some more sleep. Hopefully this doesn't happen often, isn't just some bizarre, depressing quirk of the Fleet when there's not enough drama going on already. She eats her next pink macaron in silence, waiting for his response.]

[offline] the bar!

[flameandpassion]

[ being here has been an odd mixture of joy and awful. alphonse doesn't remember her, and is apparently off ... being dead, or something? she doesn't even know anymore, and she's trying not to think about it. she can't find castiel to bother him into hanging out with her, and so she finds sam instead -- and takes a seat at the bar, a grin instantly in place. ]

You're alive.

[ warmly, and she puts her chin in her hands ]

Free drink?

shows up late with starbucks

[heavenonearth]

[ it's not easy to hear things out here, when he's in the cargo hold, so cas doesn't hear the voices right away, or the sound of the mug breaking - but once he's stepping back into the ship proper, sound carries. it's not like they're working with a lot of space, here.

either way, the sound of hurried, quietly urgent voices catches his attention, and cas tucks the bottle of absinthe under his arm as he turns the corner, brow drawn curiously - and is immediately face to face with three people, sam among them, and worse, a very familiar blood sigil on the wall.

it might be hilariously nostalgic if it weren't so terrifying; cas hates that damned sigil, and it's enough to shoot a little lance of fear straight into his gut. he's got enough angel left in him to have some sort of reaction to that thing, and he really, really doesn't want to be launched to his death into bfe outer space somewhere, thanks. immediately both hands are up, palms out. ]

Woah woah hey big guy, let's take it easy -

[ seriously what the fuck is going on here. ]

[collegedropout]

[Sam looks torn on what to do; he trusts Nami. Of course he does. She's been through so much with him, through thick and thin. He's caused her a lot of hell, and maybe he's doing that right now -- the Fleet. It's familiar, and through the cotton muffing his thoughts, he starts to put the little things together. Things like Sye telling him about balancing on your head while reading. Nami taking him clothes shopping. Faces are slowly matching with moments in time.]

Yeah... I...

[His hand lowers slightly.

And then Castiel shows up. Sam's entire body seems to be struck by some sort of lancing alarm as he turns his head toward the figure -- Castiel. Cas. Only it wasn't Castiel, not anymore, and that means... Guh, he can practically feel the archangel's fingers again, tearing through towards his soul. He scrambles toward the sigil, his other hand thrust out in front of Sye and Nami, as if to protect them from the startled angel.]

N--Get back, it's him--!!

[There won't be enough time. Lucifer's seen him, seen the sigil. They're going to be burst like grapes in just a flick of his fingers, and it'll be Sam's fault, because he wasn't vigilant, wasn't careful. He swipes, wiping his blood into the sigil to try to finish the last small piece of it. If he can just slap his palm over it, he could--]

[child_of_bhaal]

[Syeira doesn't know what the sigil does, but she knows that she can't let Sam cast whatever he's trying. She moves quick, snatching the wrist of the hand trying to complete the symbol, and with her other hand she slides her palm right across the mark, smearing it half down the wall.]

[namisan]

[Nami is so confused. Cas arriving in the hallway should have meant another familiar voice to help orient Sam, right? So why this reaction? Sam is terrified. Sam is... about to do something Cas is terrified of, and that's enough for her; sorry, Sam, you're not really thinking straight. Her tackle takes him straight to the floor, away from Sye and the mark, strong for such a scrawny looking navigator, and she really hopes your ribs have healed nicely over that two weeks of bed rest--]

It's not him! [She's not letting go either, please snap out of it--] Whoever you think that is, it's just Cas! Remember? Not even the one you know! [Her glance at Cas is half apologetic and half perplexed, because she has no clue why Sam would find him so utterly frightening all of a sudden. Something's clearly happened at home involving the angel.]

He's not hurting anyone. Least of all you. Sam, just... take a minute.

[heavenonearth]

[ he's able to breathe a little easier once syeira smears a hand through the sigil, and nami gets sam pinned, but there's still the buzz of lingering fear picking at his mind; sigil like that in a place like this is an almost guaranteed death sentence for cas as he is, and while he might not be terribly attached to his life, apparently he's attached to it enough.

once sam is down, he lowers his hands a little, taking a step back, slowly, like he's dealing with a rabid animal he's trying not to startle. ]

What did you see, Sam?

[ he asks, gently, while easing the absinthe bottle out from under his arm to set it aside, then dropping slow into a squat, elbows resting against his knees. ]

What did you see.. wherever you went?

[collegedropout]

[Sam tries to push Nami off, if only because it's for her own good — he's putting all he's got into it, and even with how stiff and uncomfortable he is from lying prone. His ribs hurt a little, yeah, his hand is smearing blood everywhere as he pushes back at Nami and Sye. What are they doing? Are they out of their minds? Or — is he just out of his? He's not sure.

But Cas — Lucifer? — is squatting down near him, and Sam looks at him with an expression of fear, disgust, a bone-deep panic. Cas is speaking so calmly, so patiently, he can only be reminded of Lucifer's display of acting. Of him telling Dean that Sam knew the risks. And then —]

You're not Cas. Nami, you got to see — It's Lucifer...!

It's a trick — !!

[Are they even Nami and Sye? Is he locked up somewhere?

Eternal torment is Lucifer's normal M.O. Sam feels trapped enough for it.

He shoves backwards with that ridiculous leg and back strength, broad shoulders bucking Nami and Sye like he's an animal they're attempting to clamor around like netting; hang on, ladies, it's a struggle. He starts in on painting a bloody circle on the floor, apparently determined to the death to at least try, even knowing Lucifer has him right where he wants him; he spent two lifetimes with Lucifer in Hell. He's got a good stubborn streak in trying to pull the bastard down with him.

Were Nami and Sye's faces just diversions—??]