driftfleet | Let's all hold hands and sing Kumbaya

It sounded like gossip.

[ And she can't help how she moves into his space a little more, definitely on the brink of being ridiculously possessive now. After what Kara had told her - well, she can't help herself. She wants to firmly plant herself beside Hank in practically everything; she's lost so much already and she refuses to let Hank be another number on top of that. She isn't going to let him go, no matter who else might have caught his attention in her absence.

Her guilt on that matter isn't all that important.

Tilting her head up, she fights back the flustering that settles in her own stomach, thank you Hank, before she kisses his cheek. ]

It's cute.

It wasn't gossiping. What did they say?

[oh god what did he say. He isn't worried about it, really; just flustered, that he was caught talking about the girl he loves to other people, which is honestly pretty par for course with him. He doesn't do it very often, since he's private with most things as is she, so it's rare that he actually does past a brief mention.

He looks away after she kisses his cheek, trying to push back the flustering even as he feels his ears burn a bit]

It is not. [why does everyone use that word]

Hank, I think you're making my ears go red right now.

[ Raven's hand moves and presses against his ear gently, as if she can somehow rub away some of the redness there with her own gentle exploring fingertips, but then she's shaking her head and moving to glance back at the tree, as if it might have some marvellous revelations for the lot of them. It doesn't of course, and she huffs a little noise as she turns her head back to look at Hank.

The thing is that she doesn't really want to tell Hank what Kara told her; she doesn't want to admit to the jealousy and the guilt she had felt in that moment, or the shock - not because she had imagined that Hank might be unable to move on, because he could, he was handsome and smart enough, but because she had still always thought of them as a 'together' even when they were apart.

She has to do her best to stop those emotions flickering over to him, but she's not certain how good a job she does. She's not exactly experienced. Instead, she shrugs a shoulder, trying to play it off. ]

We just talked, that's all.

[he leans into her hand a bit before he huffs, his voice just a little petulant and just a bit teasing] That's what you get for teasing me.

[he catches glimpses of what she feels, and it's hard not to understand nor feel a little guilty about it. Even if he had wanted to give it a shot with Kara, it was obvious that he wasn't able to - even if Raven hadn't shown up, he doubts it would've worked out. He was too caught up in how he felt about her to ever truly move on.

He doesn't address it out loud; but he does lift her hand to kiss her knuckles, something like understanding coming across their connection. Because how could he not understand, when he had his own, tiny bursts out jealousy and possessiveness when it came to what she had with Azazel?]

It sounds like you were gossiping about me instead.

[ It's hard not to laugh, and Raven shakes her head. ]

You can't make me blush just because you're blushing. That's cheating, and it looks much better on you.

[ What Raven wants right now is to practically crawl into Hank - not that she can, of course, because that's just as stupid, but she wants to be as close to him as she can manage. She wants to slide into his arms and not let go, to bask in the sense of belonging she has when she's at his side, the warmth and the comfort. It's a foreign feeling she had chased for a decade, but now it's back because of him and there's nothing she wants more than to allow herself to have it.

She gets to stay with him, too, and that means she can appreciate it all the more.

Everything about her softens when she glances up and he kisses her fingers, and Raven turns so she can respond in kind, pressing her mouth over the skin of his knuckles before she just holds it against her mouth for a moment. It's a sweet, romantic connection they're sharing and it feels wonderful; it feels like home, and she hopes that Hank can understand that, coming from her.

Shaking her head, she opens her eyes and glances up. ]

It wasn't like that, don't worry.

Apparently I can, and I'm using it to my advantage.

[he understands, very well. "Home" was a hard concept for him at times, with the only place he ever really considered it a world away. It was difficult to place the term on other places, but with people - with people it was easier. Raven felt like home, all warmth and love and everything else he never thought she'd feel for him. It was with Charles and, sometimes even with Erik. Home may have been a long time away, but it was still here in pieces, in the people he cared about and thought of using that dreaded word that seemed only to become more difficult to say.

He leans in to kiss her forehead when she looks up, and he has to wonder if the tree needs more than them sharing their feelings so openly. It wasn't as though they'd been trying to hold much back]

Mmhmm. I'm sure it wasn't like that at all.

Hank.

[ She says it with what she's sure sounds a little like a whine, and lifting herself up she draws Hank down to press a kiss against his mouth, soft and sure. One of her hands is still linked with his but the other one goes to the back of his neck, holding him in place as she offers herself entirely, not wanting to do anything else but be close to him. She doesn't even care what the tree wants them to do - as far as she's concerned it's nonsense - but she does want more of being close to Hank and, as usual, she can't quite resist the urge to smother him in her affection.

Leaning back, she softens, nudging their noses together before she turns to follow his gaze, glancing back over at the tree with a little huff. It's only when she tilts herself back up to kiss him again that she stops, taking a step back and frowning. Something feels heavy in her pocket and she's not sure what it is - and she's sure it's not Hank pressing against her, thank you, tree, they have more control than that.

Her fingers stay squeezing his before she reaches inside, pulling out a picture frame - and then she goes as still as a statue, her eyes widening and her face losing the flush of colour. ]

Raven.

[he tries to say with the same tone of voice, but it only comes out amused instead. And then she's kissing him, and there's nothing he can do but echo how she feels - that all he wants to do is be close to her, tree or not tree, bask in how she feels about him and share how he feels about her, and maybe it's taking advantage of the planet's effects but even now he can't bring himself to care. She smothers him and he returns it, and he feels like he's going to drown of warmth and love.

But then she's stepping back and his eyebrows furrow, confused. He can feel something in his pocket as well but he doesn't reach for it, not yet when he sees the expression on Raven's face. Is it good? Is it bad? Did this backfire horrendously?]

What is it?

[ Raven wants to focus on Hank, she really does, but it's hard for her to do it. It's hard for her to do anything when she's staring at the photo in her hands, the one that had appeared out of nowhere - and she wants to know what the hell the tree thinks of her, giving her this, and her heart feels a little sore and aching as she tries to breathe out and wrap her mind around it. She doesn't want to keep looking because it hurts, but at the same time she can't look away. It's impossible, really, and only Hank speaking to her snaps her out of her daze.

Tilting her head up, she hesitates, not wanting to reveal too much, but... It's Hank. What's he going to say? Nothing, probably, and she imagines he'll make more sense of it than she does, this stupid little picture that she's so stupidly fond of already. She wants to hold it to her chest like it's some kind of prized possession, some kind of anchor, and maybe it is, all things considered.

Slowly, she holds it up, turning it around for Hank to look at. It's a photo of Charles from the day of his graduation from Oxford, before they'd all started drinking and celebrating, looking utterly over the moon and completely happy. She remembers being the one to take it, she thinks, because he had been busy talking to someone else and was so happy and so charming that there was nothing she could do but capture the moment. Her brother, the professor, who had taken her by the arm and dragged her off to show just how much he could drink in half an hour.

Her hand isn't shaking, but she thinks it is. ]

Magic tree, right?

[it's hard not to look a little surprised; it wasn't as if he knew what Raven would have received from the tree or even wanted, but this wasn't something he would have expected. It was so simple and yet, he didn't need the connection to know just how important it was.

He doesn't think he's ever seen Charles look that happy. He doesn't know when it was taken but he can take his guesses - before he met them, before he even knew they existed, back before their lives had gone utterly insane. It's a good picture, and it's suiting, he thinks. That Raven would get something like this, knowing how much Charles loves her and how much she loves him.

Still, he finds himself staring at the picture a moment longer than necessary before he looks at her face, trying to gauge exactly how she feels]

Magic tree. [he repeats, his expression softening] Guess it's real, huh.

[ It's hard for her to really make sense of the things she's feeling, and for a moment she's desperately angry. She's furious that they'd give her this little taste of history that she can't touch, this thing that burns inside of her and makes her so upset she wants to snap and throw the damn thing back at the tree. She shouldn't want to remember Charles as he was, as the Oxford boy that all mothers wanted to have but theirs had ignored; she wants to know him now, as Charles Xavier the teacher.

The thing is... He's happy in this photo. She looks at it and it softens her because she's truly, desperately happy. She can remember the moment and thinking how proud she was, how happy she was that he was her brother, even if she had no idea how she would ever catch up to him, and her pride and her glee had been beautiful. She remembers it with a fond nostalgia that she doesn't mean to shove at Hank but probably goes towards him anyway, at least until she breathes out and looks up at him. ]

I get a picture of my big brother. It's definitely something.

[ Then she pauses, lowering the frame. ]

Did you get something?

[he doesn't mind the wave of fondness and nostalgia, and it even makes his smile widen, just a little. It was a good gift, he thinks. Not to keep them trapped in the past, as they've all been trying to escape it for years now, but a reminder that there were still good memories there. Even if the bad ones overshadowed them, she still had that]

You can tease him about how young he looks. [because that's what Hank would do, rather than focus on the feelings behind it at first.

At her question he finally reaches behind him to pull whatever it is in his pocket out, half-expecting a picture himself. But as he lifts it up he goes stock still, eyes widening and breath catching.

It's a book - a pun book - a little worn, like someone had kept it in a pocket and flipped through it more than once, but no less cared for as if it was something precious. He has to let go of her hand to flip it open and that's when he makes a noise, half a laugh and half something else.

He can't find his voice, so he just turns the book so Raven can see the message written on the inside cover:

Hank—

You're outta this world, buddy.
-Viva]

I'm not going to show him.

[ Charles doesn't need that. He deserves better than being forced to remember a time long ago, and the fact that the tree gave her this - well, it might not exactly thrill him. She's going to shove it into their room on the Blameless, in some corner somewhere, and then pretend that it doesn't exist. It's easier than coming face to face with memories of a Charles that doesn't exist anymore. This isn't the man that's here on the fleet and she knows that - and the tree should, too.

Hank moves and Raven follows the motions of his body, waiting for him to take the book out and show it took her. She doesn't mind waiting as his mind processes what he's been given, because if it's anything like her photo frame then... Well, it might sting or hurt and she can handle it with some patience. She's learned that, at least.

Her hand strokes over his back gently once his hand tears away from hers, and she waits until he shifts and turns the cover of the book to her so that she can read it.

Buddy. She can't help her own quiet laugh. ]

Viva - someone from the other world?

Why not? It won't upset him if you explain how you got it.

[if anyone would understand where it comes from and why she got it, it would be her and Charles, and while he can understand why she wouldn't want to show him - it'll come up eventually, whether on purpose or by accident. But regardless, that's up to Raven and how she wants to handle it.

She should never pass on teasing Charles, though.

He can't help but let his fingers touch the message written on the cover, ducking his head as he tries to get a hold on the rush of emotions it brings forth. He had very, very few possessions that he treasured, and the most important one was in his hand, as if he'd never left it back home in his office.

When he finally talks his voice is a little weak and rough]

Yeah. She's - she's family.

[ Raven ignores Hank's words, focussing on him instead. She's not the most important person in this moment and she's sure of it, especially when she watches his face. The way that he looks at it, the way that he speaks; she understands that this is something that means more to her than maybe words could express, and she steps into his space and wraps her arm around him again, drawing him close and offering him herself - for support, for warmth, for comfort, whatever he might desire.

It's hard to be a support for something you don't understand, but Raven can be a pillar even if she's blind to it. She can move closer to him and turn her gaze away from the book, something so special and important to him, and let herself hold him instead. She loves Hank, and she focusses on sending that through their connection, her love and concern and the warmth she feels in his arms, the way that her eyes are always drawn to his face, the way that her heart is so completely and utterly his.

Leaning up, she leaves a soft kiss on his cheek. ]

She must have been amazing.

[ It's Hank; she's sure that his judgement on people is sound. If he thought this person was special enough to be family, to be seen as that... Then that's good enough for her. ]

We'll have to find a special place for it.

[it's hard to settle on an emotion, because while he's thrilled to have this back, because it means so much to him, it also reminds him of how much he misses her. It's an ache that always comes back whenever he talks about Kyriakos, and while he didn't have a deep connection with his team, he did have one with a few people outside of it - and the most important one being Viva. Viva who'd bonded with him over mutations and being different and acting as each other's support when they needed it.

He leans against her and sighs out a little shakily, before he closes the book]

You'd like her. You two would've gotten along really well.

[and after a moment . . . he offers her his hand, a wordless offer to show her, because he can do that. He can share a memory of her]

[ It's another one of those things that Raven can't possibly understand, but the sting isn't really there, not in the way that it could have been. Raven knows that she's never going to really wrap her mind around Kyriakos or what happened there, but - she can try to sympathise, or support whatever is in Hank's mind. She slips closer, letting her arms hold Hank close, letting herself be his support, before she softens and tilts her gaze up to look at him, expression soft.

Raven is soft when she holds him, tilting close and pressing her mouth to the side of his head, closing her eyes and leaning against him. ]

Maybe I'll be able to meet her one day.

[ Maybe. And then Raven pauses, hesitating for a moment before she breathes out and reaches to take his hand into her own. ]

[there's a lot of memories he could share with her; both good and bad and both, some so personal he isn't sure he can or if he's allowed. Maybe one that involves the pun book, and the two of them going back and forth? Or maybe just them hanging out, doing what was as close to normal as it got in Kyriakos.

Instead, when she does take his hand and his fingers curl around hers, he focuses on when he and Viva met. He'd just remembered how he got like that and then he was like that, with very little answers or context and it'd been terrible - and yet his teammates and more importantly, Viva, had come along and had treated it as if it was the coolest thing they'd ever seen. He didn't know how to handle it, and sometimes thinking back he still doesn't. But it had left such an impression on him, so early on. It was certainly why he was more comfortable now.

He ducks his head, his hand squeezing hers the memory as well as the fond feelings that come from it are shared across their connection, but he's quiet. There's nothing to say about it, nothing to explain. It was just the beginning]

[ The memory comes gently, more like a gentle wave on a calm beach than the storm she might have been expecting, and Raven can't do much more than brace herself for a second before she leans close and accepts the memory for what it is - something sweet, and nice, and welcome, and it washes over her even as it relaxes her, not even realising the effect it's had on her until it's done.

The thing is... Of course it would be a stranger that would make Hank feel better about his mutation, especially when she wasn't sure how much he actually knew about it at that point. The people around you, your friends and family... They were supposed to accept you and supposed to love you for just the person you were, so you almost expected their comfort and their kindness. It wasn't true for her, of course, but she thinks that most families were a little bit different from the terrors that she had as parents before she met Charles.

Strangers are different. They have no obligation to tell you the truth or try to hide how they feel behind a sweet lie.

Slowly, Raven tilts herself up and, just as carefully, draws Hank down against her. She presses her forehead against his and she closes her eyes, leaning into him and holding him gently all at once, her smile soft and hidden before she speaks. ]

Thank you for showing me.

[there's more to it, of course; not shown there is something that happened after, when he'd finally given in and took that shard out. Of meeting up with Viva again and her sharing that she too had something, a mutation of a different kind that may have even been the answer to her world's problems. Problems that, while he knew what they were, was never able to get more information about in order to help her, somehow. Which was maybe for the best, but he wasn't the type to just leave it at that.

This close, and his feelings so close to the surface, though . . . it's hard, to hold back the ache of missing someone he cares so much about. He shuts his eyes and puts her arm around her, holding close and breathes out, trying to reign it back in. She had asked him not to go and . . . if he hadn't needed to go back home, he would have stayed for her.

He hasn't told anyone that, and he doubts he ever will]

You're welcome. [quietly] I miss her.

[ It's impossible, almost, to fight back the urge to push and ask for more information, because Raven is thirsty for more; she feels like she's in a barren wasteland of lacking information and it hurts. Now, though... She can ignore it. The very fact that Hank has shown her something at all means more to her than she can say, and she embraces it before she breathes out a quiet noise, tilting her head up and gazing at him with a tenderness she can't hide. She wants to comfort him but she isn't sure how, not really. It's not the kind of loss she's entirely aware of.

She feels the second the ache of missing Viva hits him, and Raven breathes out a shaking breath, her hands squeezing around the fabric of his shirt. Oh, it hurts, and she feels it deep in her own chest, and all she can do is lean close and try to hold onto him, as if she can press the hurt out of his body and make it all go away.

She can't, of course, and Raven doesn't think she'll ever be able to. ]

I know. I can feel it. [ Raven presses their foreheads together again. ] You'll see her again.

[part of him feels the same; that he'll see her again someday, whether it be here or home or in her own world, because he had refused to say goodbye. "Goodbye" always sounded permanent to him, and he couldn't leave it at that. Not when he was going home and she was still stuck there, and he was so fiercely protective of her. Something that had only grown in the end, when they'd given up their mutations to make sure the other survived. If there was a way, he'd make it work.

On the other hand . . . he knows how unlikely that is, and that's why it aches. Because logically, even if being here proved it was possible, it was different back home. He didn't know if it could happen without some sort of outside interference, and the thought that he might not ever see her again was something he did his best not to consider for very long. Because that hurt just as much as so many other things in his life.

If she wants to ask he'd answer - he'd tell her anything and she knows it, as difficult as it may end up being. What she says makes him want to pull away, but instead he lets her draw him closer, taking comfort in her embrace and that he can share this with her.

He lets out a slow breath] Sorry. [he knows he can't help it, but he's going to apologize anyway] I hope so.

[ The way that Raven sees it, despite how jaded she feels that she's become, is that they're already the impossible; humans evolved into mutants, with powers and gifts that the rest of the world can barely begin to imagine. They're already unlikely and already an impossibility come to life, and she knows that the same can be said about worlds like this, like the places Hank and Charles and Erik were at before - they're all impossible, and yet here they are.

That means there's hope, even if she doesn't want to accept it. There's hope for the future, and that means she can look forward to it or try to pretend she isn't all at the same time. It also means she can try to have hope for Hank as well; if she didn't have hope in what he meant to her then she wouldn't be here, at his side, in love with him and offering herself completely. She'd had shut herself away and locked her heart into a steel cage that no one else can touch.

Charles and Washington had done more to her and for her than she would ever be willing to admit.

It's hard not to keep holding onto Hank until all the bad feelings have gone away, but Raven has a better idea. She slips back for a moment, takes a deep breath and then guides him away from the tree, taking his hand and tugging for a moment. When there's space, a little clearing of grass and trees, she tilts herself up and smiles. ]

Sit with me?

[even with the proof that the impossible was possible staring him in the face, he still can't help some of his doubts. They're not nearly as bad as they were before he and Raven talked - that, at least, sunk in. That they'd fight for what they have and not allow it to be taken from them. That much he knows, and he'd fight to get back to Viva, too. But that was a world away - two, if she's gone home by now - and years into the future.

Idly, he hopes that he did exist in some form in her world. That the addresses he gave her worked and she was able to find them, that she could find a safe place to stay and that he'd help her out in any way he can, despite her being a stranger. It wasn't hope, not really, but it came very, very close, and he had to have it. He had to hang onto it because the other option was thinking the worst and he didn't want that.

He blinks but follows along at the tug, and he manages something of a smile and a nod. Sitting down sounded great, especially considering all the rush of emotions they were sharing was starting to get to him. So he sits down, and gently tugs on her hand for her to join him]

Sitting sounds great.

[ It's easy, once they're away from the tree, to slip down and settle beside Hank, to lean against him and shove herself against his body so his arm has to go around her. It's easy to be the one to support him because at the moment she's doing a rather good job at hiding her own tangled emotions, and her conversation with Charles comes back to her memory with tingling sadness, prickling at her thoughts and making her frustrated as she stomps it down.

She doesn't want to expose Hank to that, not right now.

Instead, she leans against him and closes her eyes, forcing all those thoughts and memories away. Right now all she can do is focus on Hank and soothing him, sending love and affection in his general direction. It's so strange to be so deeply connected to someone and she feels as though she's fallen into something; her breathing catching before she shakes her head and relaxes.

Oh, but she loves him, so much, and that's what makes all of this so much harder.

Raven wants to believe that he'll find Viva again, that they'll be together, that everything will work. He wants to believe that Hank can find the people from the world he was in before and be happy. It doesn't stop her being a little selfishly jealous, that he had all of that, a brand new family, and she has nothing (not literally, she's aware of that, but...) She wants to be a part of it and she can't be, because that's untouchable, and she can push all those thoughts away.

Instead, she tilts her head up and offers him a small, soft smile. ]

It's actually a really nice forest.

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