Edwin Jarvis (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
edwinjarvis) wrote in ![[community profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/community.png)
driftfleet2016-12-30 03:42 pm
edwinjarvis) wrote in driftfleet2016-12-30 03:42 pm
video.
Who: Mr. Jarvis and you!
Broadcast: Fleetwide
Action: Marsiva
When: Today!
[The video begins with a fellow in a well-pressed suit and a carefully adjusted tie, all befitting someone who puts the most care into looking a well-kept part in society. His poor hair could do with some pomade - it hangs a bit, droops like a wilted leaf on his forehead, but otherwise he's made sure to keep his dignity in the wake of this... horrible event. He's been clearly kidnapped. Kidnapped! He prays Miss Carter is safe somewhere; the last thing he remembers is being hit with a tranquilizer, but he can't seem to remember if it had been a terribly dangerous affair. Didn't they have the assailant in their trunk? Oh, what a beast the man had been. He will attempt to keep his composure regardless. It's his job.]
While I appreciate that you've let me keep my reading glasses, I'm afraid I won't be broken in by such... backwards methods. Whoever you are and wherever you have... taken me, I can assure you that you've chosen a terrible person to kidnap and that kindness will earn you nothing of use. I'm just the butler; a chauffeur, and I'll have little to offer you, unless you would like to learn how to properly fold any and all manner of clothing.
... Or how to properly prepare a dining table.
[I imagine nothing of that sort will interest you, you're probably all thuggish barbarians.]
If you think you'll get anything at all from me otherwise — well!
[He folds his arms, and though he's concerned for his health in the future (god please don't murder me whoever you people are), he is doing his best impression of an impassive, dry-witted butler. As always. He doesn't sell it perfectly, but at least he's selling it, and that's what matters. Look how tough and unbreakable I am. Can't hurt a butler when he's down.]
You're sorely mistaken.
[........ brb fumbling now]
How do I turn this thing off?
Broadcast: Fleetwide
Action: Marsiva
When: Today!
[The video begins with a fellow in a well-pressed suit and a carefully adjusted tie, all befitting someone who puts the most care into looking a well-kept part in society. His poor hair could do with some pomade - it hangs a bit, droops like a wilted leaf on his forehead, but otherwise he's made sure to keep his dignity in the wake of this... horrible event. He's been clearly kidnapped. Kidnapped! He prays Miss Carter is safe somewhere; the last thing he remembers is being hit with a tranquilizer, but he can't seem to remember if it had been a terribly dangerous affair. Didn't they have the assailant in their trunk? Oh, what a beast the man had been. He will attempt to keep his composure regardless. It's his job.]
While I appreciate that you've let me keep my reading glasses, I'm afraid I won't be broken in by such... backwards methods. Whoever you are and wherever you have... taken me, I can assure you that you've chosen a terrible person to kidnap and that kindness will earn you nothing of use. I'm just the butler; a chauffeur, and I'll have little to offer you, unless you would like to learn how to properly fold any and all manner of clothing.
... Or how to properly prepare a dining table.
[I imagine nothing of that sort will interest you, you're probably all thuggish barbarians.]
If you think you'll get anything at all from me otherwise — well!
[He folds his arms, and though he's concerned for his health in the future (god please don't murder me whoever you people are), he is doing his best impression of an impassive, dry-witted butler. As always. He doesn't sell it perfectly, but at least he's selling it, and that's what matters. Look how tough and unbreakable I am. Can't hurt a butler when he's down.]
You're sorely mistaken.
[........ brb fumbling now]
How do I turn this thing off?
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That sounds like a very exciting job, Mr Jarvis. You must miss it already.
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As exasperated as I often was, it's home now. And home is a place I'm rather fond of.
And... I imagine my wife will be very cross with me for going on this journey alone.
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Has no one told you she won't even notice you're gone? The welcoming committee must be slipping.
[She can offer that slim reassurance, even if she has to phrase it as a question.]
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Surely she will, if I'll be here for an indefinite amount of time.
[No, he isn't aware of the clock on pause back home. But that would be helpful, now wouldn't it?]
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Why don't you ask one of the people you know about it? [Or know of. She can see there's a couple.]
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Yes, I... suppose I will...
[What is happening to me.]
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Not me, though. I'm afraid I'm too young and idiotic to know much of anything.
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There's no need to put yourself down, miss, I'm sure you're a very bright and intelligent woman.
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Well, Mr Jarvis, it's very nice of you to say so. I suppose time will tell, won't it?
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[Who says being kidnapped in space has to be all blind panic?
Nay, says me. We'll talk later, my dear!]